Feeling like i'll never stop loving her

[Loveisdifficult]

We were together for two years,
We had it all, we matched perfectly. I figured she was the love of my life, i shared things with her i couldn't share with anyone else, not even close family. We had one problem, her father didn't accept me & i wasn't welcome at their home. I saw how sad that made her, she had a lot of fights at home, she got into trouble a lot due to this & it made her depressed, sad,... But not once did she think about breaking up with me.
I lost both my parents when i was 14 (21 now) , i wish i could know how it feels to be loved by a parent & it hurt me, seeing i was the reason of her suffering, the reason her dad treated her like shit, didn't give her the love she deserved. So i decided i didn't want that for her, so i pushed her away & started being a dick, all because i knew i wouldn't be able to break up & she wouldn't allow it. Now she blocked me everywhere. A month after we broke up i contacted a friend of hers who confirmed that her issues at home are gone. Its been 5 months & recently noticed she sometimes unblocks my instagram to check my stories & then re-blocks me. So i thought she still cared, but she recently got into a new relationship, it broke my heart, again.
Little does she know, why i did what i did & i don't want her to know, ever. Cause she'll feel guilty.
I tried dating , i tried meeting someone new, but i just can't. I still love her so much, crying as i write this. she hates me but i feel like i'll never stop loving her & i still see her as the love of my life.
I feel like there will always be a part of me waiting for her.
If she's in trouble & calls me i wouldn't hesitate a second to go help her as much as i can.
I'm so stuck

 

[Voyager]

Why doesn't the dad accept you? Any particular reason?

The dad not accepting you isn't a reason to break it off. It's a reason to prove to him that you can look after his girl.

If i was in this situation I'd go back to her, tell her exactly how it was, and go from there.

If you don't think you're up to that, then it may be time to move on.

 

[Loveisdifficult]

@Voyager

There was no particular reason, i was her first boyfriend.
The dad was just jealous i think & he has some mental issues, no one at their home dares to talk against him, even her mom is afraid of him.

I wish i could go back to her, but i pushed her away. She hated me, yet still loved me at the same after we broke up, 3 months after we broke up She said she lost her feelings for me, and now recently she got into a relationship (+- 5 months after we broke up) & I still love her as much as before we broke up.

But i noticed her sneaking on my instagram stories, i had a date last week (just me trying to move on but all i could think of during the date was how fun it used to be with her) & apparantly she panicked but didn't want to say anything because she just got someone new,..

I honestly have no clue on what to do to move on, i totally lost her now that she has someone new

 

[Voyager]

@Voyager

There was no particular reason, i was her first boyfriend.
The dad was just jealous i think & he has some mental issues, no one at their home dares to talk against him, even her mom is afraid of him.

I wish i could go back to her, but i pushed her away. She hated me, yet still loved me at the same after we broke up, 3 months after we broke up She said she lost her feelings for me, and now recently she got into a relationship (+- 5 months after we broke up) & I still love her as much as before we broke up.

But i noticed her sneaking on my instagram stories, i had a date last week (just me trying to move on but all i could think of during the date was how fun it used to be with her) & apparantly she panicked but didn't want to say anything because she just got someone new,..

I honestly have no clue on what to do to move on, i totally lost her now that she has someone new

If you still love her try and win her back. Doesn't matter if she has someone else now, you can at least try.

Alternatively you can try and move on (no advice for this, time is the only thing which maters) and potentially spark things up later on

 

[BUILD]

These situations can be very hard. You have 2 options.

A) You see her in-person, have that eye-to-eye heart-to-heart conversation. Tell her that you felt un accepted, and that you feel you were the root cause of every thing wrong with her family life at home. Tell her you acted that way because you didn't want to hurt her but didn't realize how much that would hurt her and yourself. Apologize, and try to work it out.

B) You still see her in-person, but this time the chat doesn't go how you want it, so you discuss with her the topic and then you develop 'closure' with her and ensure no hard feelings, a thanks for the chance, and if you want ask to be friends still, nothing more.

You WILL get over it if it doesn't work out.
These things take tons of time!

 

[SwoleScape]

Friend was in a similar situation. And as much as it hurts, all I can tell you is that you are young and you have a whole life ahead of you and you will find somebody else. Truth of the matter is... it's been 5 months since you stopped dating and she recently got into a new relationship and most likely (definitely) fucked some other guy. Do you really want to pursue going after her knowing she fucked someone after you were dating? Love hurts, but sometimes going through the hardest times will prepare you for your best.

 

[Markz]

You'r still young, I've been there thinking life was over without her.

Just to let you know it gets better, you start to feel better over time. But it take a long time sadly.

 

Friend im in the same situation. It will take months to feel best. Sorry u have ti go thru this.

 

[GoldMine2210]

This is depressing man, similar thing happened with my last relationship. After all was said and done, the woman of my dreams left me to be with my BEST friend. So not only did I lose my girl, I lost my BEST friend that I'd been friends with for over 7 years - one day were hanging out talking about my break up, then months go by and I never hear from him again.

To make matters even worse.. I worked with the girl for about 1.5 years after, knowing she was dating my "friend" thinking I'd get over it but I never did. On top of that, they made her a manager toward the end of my time at the work place. As soon as she started telling me what to do, I quit. So I was out of a job, my best friend, and my girl..

I think working together after our break up made it much worse. It's been about a year since I left the job, I've taken plenty of time to myself and I'm FINALLY starting to feel better & check out other girls.

I hope you get/got through this, love can absolutely suck.
Best of luck, you will heal - just takes time!