Selfies at funerals...

Please read this article before you post a generic answer, would prefer one in response to it: here

tl;dr (kind of)

The problem with death, as I’m sure you’ll agree, is that people don’t take enough photographs of it.

The thing is – it’s definitely not the worst way you can document a funeral.

[give an example of a businessman asking someone to film a funeral because he couldn't make it]

There really should be more pictures of death, though. Nobody photographs the end. Mantelpieces are full of framed pictures of newborn babies, but nobody frames a picture of the old man dying in the next ward, to remind you what happens next.

But then, death is supposed to be hard. Funerals are supposed to be hard. And if you’re used to having your phone in your hand at all times, you need those dopamine hits more than ever – you are basically a drug addict, taking drugs at a funeral.

This summer, I took photos of my daughter standing next to my grandmother’s grave. A little girl who didn’t even understand that she was in a graveyard, running around, probably desecrating stuff with all of her energy and rush.

I think he/she has a point. It's a coping mechanism and there should be no 'outcry' about such things. Death is this un-talked-about taboo and when it springs upon children and such it's a world-rocker.

Referring to: http://selfiesatfunerals.tumblr.com/

Example:

 

[Lame]

There really should be more pictures of death, though. Nobody photographs the end. Mantelpieces are full of framed pictures of newborn babies, but nobody frames a picture of the old man dying in the next ward, to remind you what happens next.

I agree with this but then when i see the photo that was taken it doesn't reflect any kind if remorse or greiving for the dead. Seems like two arrogant douche bags who didn't really want to be there and were bored. This is disrespect at its finest.

This i can agree with as a coping mechanism. And its not completely disrespectful as most of the ones i looked at.



Edit: this is another one of vices hipster bs articles. #notworththetime.

 

I don't see it as disrespectful, though... I mean, I wouldn't want loads of people sitting crying and being in awkward silence at my funeral. Obviously they'd be heartbroken (you can see she's been crying).. but why not try and be how the deceased would want you to be

On a day where you're at the bottom and maybe need some attention, why not try and get some online if it'll help you cope.

 

[BGlave]

Are you subscribed to tyt?

OT: I blame social media sites. The people who are doing this are narrow-minded, superficial morons. My biggest problem with this is you're suppose to mourn at a funeral with other relatives or friends to share your thoughts about the person who died. Then again, how would one recognize grief in a picture? All in all, this shouldn't have any attention. It would only make the trend bigger.

 

[Lame]

I don't see it as disrespectful, though... I mean, I wouldn't want loads of people sitting crying and being in awkward silence at my funeral. Obviously they'd be heartbroken (you can see she's been crying).. but why not try and be how the deceased would want you to be

On a day where you're at the bottom and maybe need some attention, why not try and get some online if it'll help you cope.

In that case id request this at your funeral.

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/04/12/nyregion/12funerals.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0

“To us it’s a celebration, but to an American they see it as a place of sadness,” Manny Tamakloe, 27, an aircraft mechanic, shouted over the music as he sipped a Guinness at Mrs. Ikol’s funeral. “If you’re Ghanaian and you come here, you’ll see 10 or 12 people you know and they’ll introduce you to somebody. And before you know it, you know everybody.”

“Why go to the bar,” he asked, “when you can come here and get it for free?”

^^thats a culture different cultures have different ways of dealing with death. These idiots are hipster morons just going with a trend like bglave said.

 

you're suppose to mourn at a funeral

Why? What good does crying do?

I'll give a brief example.

A friend of mine killed himself just before the summer. All of us from school and rugby were fucking distraught. Like, totally in disbelief and upset. He was a good friend of mine and many other people. At his funeral service there was no moping around crying, there was just a group of family and close friends laughing about all the good times, making fun of stupid things he did.. people were happy (OMG!!!!111!). I'm pretty sure had someone taken a photo and hashtagged it with #funeral #goodtimes #r.i.p[name] it would've gotten hate. People cry enough when it happens and when they're at home or in bed at night.

I don't see why it's such a problem for people, obviously people are mourning and are upset - but crying at a funeral doesn't need to be necessary or the only thing you remember.

 

[BGlave]

Why? What good does crying do?

I'll give a brief example.

A friend of mine killed himself just before the summer. All of us from school and rugby were fucking distraught. Like, totally in disbelief and upset. He was a good friend of mine and many other people. At his funeral service there was no moping around crying, there was just a group of family and close friends laughing about all the good times, making fun of stupid things he did.. people were happy (OMG!!!!111!). I'm pretty sure had someone taken a photo and hashtagged it with #funeral #goodtimes #r.i.p[name] it would've gotten hate.

I don't see why it's such a problem for people, obviously people are mourning and are upset - but crying at a funeral doesn't need to be necessary or the only thing you remember.

Mourn doesn't mean to cry specifically and never stated they had to or should. You're showing sorrow and or disbelief for that person's death. Technology is so involved in our lives we lose focus of what's really going on.

 

I'm pretty sure had someone taken a photo and hashtagged it with #funeral #goodtimes #r.i.p[name] it would've gotten hate.

Right?

I'm not some moron dependant on social media but if I were on a large social platform and I'd have had my phone on and taken a picture - I'd be hated on?

In my personal opinion, those who hate on people so quickly are the result of social media rather than the object on the other end. Someone above called them disrespectful, hipster faggots. You called them narrow-minded, superficial morons. Why? Just because they posted a picture? I don't know... I'm actually really surprised people have a problem with it

If you look at all the old traditions or the tribes and cultures who aren't "modern" per se, then you'll see a celebration of life and not a mournful gathering of death. Maybe it's just me, but I'd rather my loved ones have a great time at my funeral and take as many selfies/pictures as they need or want to.

 

[BGlave]

There is a difference between celebrating one's death and wanting attention from it. Everything is revolved around social media and it really brings out the stupid in individuals. I called them what I did because they're following a trend that is disrespectful. Some of the pictures I've seen are totally irrelevant to what they're talking or hashtagging about. Because of this, it's getting attention. Does anyone have morals anymore?

 

[Lame]

Right?

I'm not some moron dependant on social media but if I were on a large social platform and I'd have had my phone on and taken a picture - I'd be hated on?

In my personal opinion, those who hate on people so quickly are the result of social media rather than the object on the other end. Someone above called them disrespectful, hipster faggots. You called them narrow-minded, superficial morons. Why? Just because they posted a picture? I don't know... I'm actually really surprised people have a problem with it

If you look at all the old traditions or the tribes and cultures who aren't "modern" per se, then you'll see a celebration of life and not a mournful gathering of death. Maybe it's just me, but I'd rather my loved ones have a great time at my funeral and take as many selfies/pictures as they need or want to.

I agree with this it should be a celebration of sorts BUT unfortunately i think this is just some fad and thats the main reason i find it disrespectful. Btw i didn't call them "hipster faggots" i called them."hipster morons"... How about you celebrate their memory in real life(like the example you gave). Obviously they just want attention via social media.

 

What's wrong with wanting attention when you feel like shit? If not from family, who also feel shit, then why not from the people who follow you on social media for support?

Yeah, okay, some heartless people may have taken it too far. But why should they spoil it for the whole crowd. Just like everything. Try not to stereotype here, I'm kind of going with the author's point rather than the individual people involved.

 

[Lame]

What's wrong with wanting attention when you feel like shit? If not from family, who also feel shit, then why not from the people who follow you on social media for support?

Yeah, okay, some heartless people may have taken it too far. But why should they spoil it for the whole crowd. Just like everything. Try not to stereotype here, I'm kind of going with the author's point rather than the individual people involved.

This is just another result of technology and people not being able to socially express themselves in reality so they turn to social media because all they do is text and dumb themselfs down all day. This results in them not knowing how to express themselfs face to face with an an actual person.

 

[BGlave]

They want the attention for the attention, everyone does. They take away the significance of a funeral and what goes on there. Taking pictures at funerals isn't a bad thing, it's how you present yourself that may be the problem. I totally agree they ruin it for many others who don't have their intentions which is why I hope the trend dies out.

 

As soon as something becomes a "trend" people hate on it, whether it's good or bad. Look past it being a trend and look at the act itself Don't focus on the "morons" who spoil it, but those who take it seriously.

Anywho this post was just aimed at the author's point of view, irrespective of the pictures, just I thought I'd add why the author chose to write about it.



sidenote@lame: that's the attitude that I hate - people sometimes NEED somewhere online. So? Why can't we all go converse with ACTUAL people about this topic? A worldwide scope is much better not only for discussion but for people seeking support and whatever else they want to bring attention to. I have a tumblr - if something shit happens and I make a post about it and people replying makes me feel a bit better - am I a moron dumbing myself down?

 

[Lame]

As soon as something becomes a "trend" people hate on it, whether it's good or bad. Look past it being a trend and look at the act itself Don't focus on the "morons" who spoil it, but those who take it seriously.

Anywho this post was just aimed at the author's point of view, irrespective of the pictures, just I thought I'd add why the author chose to write about it.



sidenote@lame: that's the attitude that I hate - people sometimes NEED somewhere online. So? Why can't we all go converse with ACTUAL people about this topic? A worldwide scope is much better not only for discussion but for people seeking support and whatever else they want to bring attention to. I have a tumblr - if something shit happens and I make a post about it and people replying makes me feel a bit better - am I a moron dumbing myself down?

The internet is a great resource to get support on whatever you need, its just sometimes the way people go about getting support sometimes seems a lot more like attention seeking.

A support forum for abused women, drug addicts, teen moms etc. That is great this just seems silly to me. Sorry if i came off as a jerk in my last post. Thats just how i feel in regards to this situation.

 

"Attention seeking" doesn't always need to be a bad thing, especially when you're feeling like shit. It just gets that stigma because it has a bigger audience. If it were on a private facebook with 200 friends it would be fine. Just people take it so seriously when it's a worldwide audience.

Hell, if I want support because I've had a shit day due to failing an exam, my car breaking down, kicking the table and hurting my toe.. I should be able to post and be sympathised with and not be called attention seeking or belittled because people have bigger problems. (Not aimed at you, just letting my mind wander)

Off on a tangent here, I'll try keep it on topic from here lol.

 

[Lame]

"Attention seeking" doesn't always need to be a bad thing, especially when you're feeling like shit. It just gets that stigma because it has a bigger audience. If it were on a private facebook with 200 friends it would be fine. Just people take it so seriously when it's a worldwide audience.

Hell, if I want support because I've had a shit day due to failing an exam, my car breaking down, kicking the table and hurting my toe.. I should be able to post and be sympathised with and not be called attention seeking or belittled because people have bigger problems. (Not aimed at you, just letting my mind wander)

Off on a tangent here, I'll try keep it on topic from here lol.

Well you are seeking attention. Sure you want to vent that you've had a bad day, some people don't want to hear it. Message a friend on facebook. Text or call someone about it. Don't let the whole world know you stubbed your toe and failed your exam. Because your obviously doing it to gain attention whether you are consciously aware of it or not.

 

Then those people can unfollow me and not look at my blog, it's MY blog for my feelings and posts and whatnot - same as these people.

Just when something has a global audience, people don't look at it the same. Which is more of an effect of social media on their part than the person posting.

 

[Lame]

Then those people can unfollow me and not look at my blog, it's MY blog for my feelings and posts and whatnot - same as these people.

Just when something has a global audience, people don't look at it the same. Which is more of an effect of social media on their part than the person posting.

Is tumblr a blog of sorts? I only go on there to look at gifs. Anyways i think a blog vs facebook/twitter are very different things. Blogs are more personnel(with less of an audience) while facebook/twitter are mainly used for mass communication on a much less descriptive/personnel level.


Either way people can do as they please. Like you said i don't have to follow and i wont go personally hate on any of them on their social media accounts. My opinion is that taking these pictures is disrespectful but at the end of the day its 10x worse insulting and hating someone whos loved one just died(even if they are looking for the attention).

 

Of course, I just enjoy casual debate about whatever's on my mind. I can definitely see both sides and why you say what you do, but it doesn't stop me from playing Devil's advocate to get discussion going