I am stuck..

[Glyder]

Well as you might know, I posted a lot of things on my EX, well that is over and done.

We sat down, talked and came to this -
We will just keep all contact away except when in groups or a club.

^ That helped just getting her to talk.


Now I have this issue.

This girl in Arizona has liked me for over 2 years now. I live in Hawaii, but she visits every couple months. She really wants to date me LD, I kinda want to cause I have feelings, we know each other IRL, so yesterday she tells me, she loves me....

Now another girl I know, is also really into me, I have known her for about 4 months. So today we were texting, she tells me she really wants to be FWB with me but not date since she would not like that. I said ok, define FWB, next thing I know she said check your email, and I got what, well, nudes saying FWB, get it now babe?

Well I want to do things FWB with the one girl, cause well, she is fucking sexy, beautiful and what-not, rocking body and features...

But on the otherhand, I have history, with the other girl and she really likes/loves me.



I want to date the first one AND be FWB with the second, but is it wrong to if your just getting enjoyment? ( I am 16 )..

What do you think..

Personally I want to do both, but risk something comming up? For one I told the FWB girl about the first and she told me, I just want to be FWB even if you love her or not. So well, I know she isn't a tramp as well so don't say whore either...

What do you think?
Would it be "OK" for me to do both?

 

[Vini]

Do you think its okay to do both? You are pretty much cheating.

 

[El DLo]

First off, don't even consider cheating. It seems ideal before you do it, but believe me from personal experience you feel awful about it, and you'll eventually come to loath your relationship with the girl who lives far away because you'll hate what you're doing to her, even if you don't wish to admit it.

That said, long distance relationships are hard. I had to have one temporarily while I was on a 2 month business trip several states away. It actually lead to the end of that relationship, I'm sorry to say, and unless your bond is unbreakable, they will likely end in conflict. If you are having thoughts of not being faithful, then you're probably not ready to consider a long-distance relationship even if that's what you want. Figure out what you want first. Realize that seeing a loved one only once every several months is extremely difficult and unless the opportunity to become closer is going to arise in the foreseeable future (an example being college), it probably won't work out.

On the same spectrum, friends with benefits sounds appealing, but you'll find yourself wanting more. From the start it sounds like she's adamant about NOT dating, and that's an issue, because it means it's not likely that she'll develop feelings. However, the more you spend time with her, and the more you fool around with her, you'll start to feel like you're dating someone who both doesn't love you and feels no need to be faithful to you, and it's going to hurt. In fact, it'll feel like a breakup even though there's no relationship to begin with. I say this also from personal experience, because I've experienced this from both side and it sucks being hurt as well as knowing deep down that your personal gratification is hurting someone else.

Honestly, I think what you need is some time to play it single. You're 16, you have time to figure things out, and especially once you hit college there will be more opportunities. If the girl who lives out of state likes you as much as she says, then unless you're totally into the idea of being with her, I'd give it time and let things play out. There's no reason you need to be picking either of them right now, but especially be careful about the long-distance one, because unless your bond is flawless, issues will likely come up.

 

[Glyder]

Well here is what I came up with, I am not going to do both..

I care alot about the first girl and well, I can wait for her.

So, if things do not go well with us, I always have a backup I guess.

I am not one to cheat, no idea why I though about it at first..

 

[kid elvranqe]

post the pictures so we can better help you with your predicament.

in all seriousness, just do what you feel is right. go with your gut feeling because if the relationship is really meant to be, she will understand.
although from personal experience, when a girl says she loves you and you havent dated eachother for a lengthly period of time, she really doesnt know what love is and is just saying that because she wants to feel accepted.

 

[superman sp]

Do FWB first and then go date simple

 

[Glyder]

Donja just love people?

 

[Billetes]

I say you do the FWB thing with the second girl, and THEN start a relationship with the long distance one.

 

[Glyder]

I say you do the FWB thing with the second girl, and THEN start a relationship with the long distance one.

Yeah I plan to do that... least for now... Idk, tbh, may just be single haha and do FWB for fun.. MeH, least I know how to stay clean..

 

[FrozenChaos]

What does FWB mean? Do that first, then do the long distance relationship.

 

[El DLo]

FWB means Friends With Benefits. As in someone that they're not dating, but fool around with anyway. From personal experience, this tends to be a bad idea because inevitably one of them is going to end up developing feelings for the other and getting hurt.