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Forcing Family

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Oct 13, 2007
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You are born with a family, must that mean you have to love them?

Today my Grandfather asked me to helped him with a certain thing, I occasionally meet him (about each 3 - 4 months) because I dislike him, no he does not abuse me in any way or hurts me; but there are certain people I rather be around with and some I rather not.

When he asked me I tried to make up an excuse not to go, he got mad and about after 30 minutes I went to help him, not because I love him but because I think we should respect the elderly and I had guilty feelings like letting him down, making him feel unwanted etc...

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Should I be forced to like / love my family just because of our blood connections?

If when I was younger, I had a friend whom now I cannot stand, and I stop seeing him then people will say "Well you cant force him to be his friend, people change".
So why if I say I don't love my Grandparents anymore I'll get comments like "Their your family! you must love them"

Note I'm not talking about extreme cases where someone from the family hurts you , but a normal family.
 
Yup, As everyone else said..You're not forced to like them...But yeah, you should love them..They brought you up.
 
Even if your family treats u like crap, no matter what, u are there peers. U MUST love them. Sorry but u must
 
Even if your family treats u like crap, no matter what, u are there peers. U MUST love them. Sorry but u must

Sorry, but I disagree.
They may be family, but if you dont like them then you dont like them.
You may have no logical explanation as to why you cannot tolerate that family member, but it doesnt mean your wrong and you should 'love' him.

I cant say I can relate to your scenario, but I have been through this experience with friends rather then family.
If you don't like them, you dont like them.
You cannot be forced by other peoples morals, ideas and opinions.
 
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The word love has been used so many times, it has people confused to the real meaning. When people say "you need to love your family", you don't have to be all cuddly and jolly with them 100%. It's hard to explain, but I would say "love", would be similar to "respect".
 
Don't have to like, but a there has to be a certain air of love, and willingness to help in difficult times.

my 2 cents.
 
Honestly, I don't think you should be forced to love your family. My parents both despise my uncle and aunt but I like them. I hate my cousin but I have to see her on a weekly basis, and be nice to her. I think it's just a matter of respect.
 
I hate my grandparents, i always make excuses to not see them. I see them once every couple years. I don't really see the need to see them. They are family, but apart from that they are nothing else, they don't mean much to me. It sounds harsh but its the truth.
 
It doesn't mean you have to love them, I hate my uncle with a white hot rage, and I still feel fine.
 
No, after a while, your personality comes intact, and that's where the real chemistry comes in. Just do remember of all of the things that they did for you when you were little.

Like, oh I don't know.
College.
Birthdays.
Money.
Clothing
Vacations
Cars.
Help.

It's an evolutionary genetic behavior
 
When it comes to family, you don't have to like them. Love them, or at least respect them
 
I think this will be different for every person. But somewhere along the line for reasons unknown you always care for your family.
 
You aren't forced to love them just because of your blood. But someone such as your grandfather, whom with you have no connection, and I'm just gonna assume he had no part of raising you, you shouldn't be forced to love because he held no importance in your life. That just me speaking but I would have to say you SHOULD love your family.But you DON'T have to.
 
Give your love to whom ever you think deserves it.

"So much of what we know of love we learn at home."
 
not because I love him but because I think we should respect the elderly and I had guilty feelings like letting him down, making him feel unwanted etc...
That's only about it,even if you don't like someone who in your family whose old,you should help him/her,because old people can't do much things that you can do at your age,i'm sure you will realise this when you grow up and be a Father/Grandfather.
 
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