Thanks, Brother.

do you take creative writing class at school? because im starting it this year, and you seem pretty good at it, lol

 

No, I hardly write poems, unless it's for school.

 

Awesome poem, for some reason I started off reading like it was a rap lol

Very touching, 10/10.

 

Perfect, just that one little error. I guess editing all those interviews made me alert.

 

He just wrote it to let his feelings out, not to make a nice poem for little finny.

 

I can only think of one word , WOW. Shit man, you should really show that to your brother somehow. Damn if i were you brother and you showed it to me I would cry like hell. Very nice writing and very touching!

 

As I've stated before, I didn't really write it as a poem, I just needed to write something down. I'm pretty sure you can find some Imagery in there..

@M.A. Thanks

 

Did you read the fucking poem? Obviously not if you are asking the background of it...

Very touching poem.

 

Very deep.

 

Thanks again, can anyone give me ways on improving?

 

mmm, yeah. Thanks Finn.

 

You roll in with that can in your hand
You shout, You scream, all these demands
All I could hear was mommy cryin, Daddy yellin
About how that shit from your breath was smellin
I was only young, I didn't deserve it.
How my self-esteem went down, yeh you hurt it.

I knew what was important to me.
That is God and my family.
Had you been gone, it woulda been a tragedy
Losing my brother, what a catastrophe.

You leave us, like you just don't care.
two weeks later your back, thats not fair
you left us, you think its all gonna be sweet now.
Nice act, why don't you just take a bow.

Im not saying I dont miss you,
Im just saying we need you to
Be strong and get out of this misery
and we can put it all in history

Me and you we had our days,
Some where blue and some were grays,
I wonder if it'll ever be the same.
Because I know we wont care one day

I can read read between the lies
You can see the tears between those eyes.
I wont tell you because you'll just deny
That what your doing, It could make you die

I know you see what Im telling you
I just hope its gettin through
That without our help, your not getting anywhere soon
Just sing this song, Ill give you the tune

Now im here in this room.
one on one, its me and you
I tell you my story, you laugh
Its not my fault you chose this path
I stop you, I tell you the deepest thing i feel about you
That is, That I really do love you.

 

Added your song to the first post.

 

Nice, Whats it have to do with his part of the poem?

 

I made his poem into a poetic rap. Ill make a better one later, that one took me 20 minutes. Ill be adding gansta rap to ot.

 

amazing. Give it to your brother please...