Lol Wut

Chuck Norris once lost a fight to a paraplegic because "His chi was too strong."

 

Holy fucking panda titties!
I declare sir Shredderbeam SPAM KING!!!!

 

When the boogyman goes to sleep everynight, he checks his closet for chuck norris

 

Chuck norris tears cure cancer, To bad he has never cried EVER

 

Rather then chuck norris being like a normal child, cHuck norris decided to punch his way out his mothers womb.

 

Nick you know we also need food and water, but not mountain dew coz it can make your balls shrink to the size of small peanuts

 

Chuck norris once shot down a german fighting plane with his finger yelling" bang"

 

Chuck norris" crouched and ready to attack" chuck norris never had to pay taxes" ever"

 

^^ one of my favorites there lol.

 

Fucked that one up^^

 

Chuck Norris once got an erection. Nobody noticed.

 

Chuck Norris masturbates furiously in a corner whenever he sees a Bowflex commercial.

 

In fine print of the last page of the guinness book of world records in notes that all worlds records are help by chuck norris and those listed in the book are the closest anyone has ever gotten

 

Chuck Norris once tried to eat a 72 oz steak in an hour, but filled up on a house salad then threw up.

 

Hahaha

 

Chuck norris is currently suing nbc claiming" law and order" are trademarked names for his " left and right legs"

 

Chuck Norris gives all his friends back, sack and crack waxes. But he is very gentle with them.

 

Chuck Norris doesn't like fat chicks. He loves them.

 

Chuck Norris uses live rattlesnakes as condoms. Tiny, baby rattlesnakes.

 

Rofl, Chuck norris roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes strait out!