gf 2 months pregnant & want to get rid of baby

Idk how to break it to her but i want to ditch the baby to come. I have no plans of being a father in life, and especially not with her. How should i tell her this? I can afford it btw

 

"A firm believer of God." But you want to get an abortion.

In other news id just tell her that you dont want to have it. You just dont see having her and you baby in your life (could go either way). And also tell her you dont have the time to raise a baby (Only say this if ur still in school).

Or you could just try and talk to her and see what she says and if not just start saying stuff from above and hopefully you can talk her out of it.

 

I'd sit down with her and have a long conversation about your options. If you two can not agree on something that is best for the both of you, it's going to be a nightmare. Therefore, it's best to invest a lot of time talking with her and trying to get her on the same page. Not sure if you're from the U.S. or not, but many states will practically always side with the woman in court, and you'll be forced to participate in the child's life, or pay child care at the very least.

OT: You can always pot the baby up for adoption if she doesn't want an abortion. Maybe she agrees that you're not fit as a father and wants to raise the baby on her own without any money from you. I'd definitely start by understanding what options you have, and make a list of what works best to what will not work at all, in order. Don't present that list to her, but have that in mind whilst discussing your options.

 

I'd start by listing out the pros and cons of having a child. From there you can go down the list and both speak your mind about the benefits and downsides of raising a child. If you guys still differ on the matter, it's time to bring it up to the parents (if you haven't already, not sure how old you guys are). Legal counsel after that to discuss terms if you aren't going to stick together.

EDIT: Try your best to align with her from the start, don't get upset if her thought process differs from yours, and remain calm throughout the discussion. This is life-changing regardless of the decision, and there's no going back once this plays out. I'm a new father of a 2 month old so feel free to AM.

 

I myself got my girlfriend pregnant at the age of 16 and never did I think of an abortion, not only because of my own personal opinions but imagine the damage it will do to her body or any further damage down the line.

I don't regret the decisions we made together and I can honestly say I'm glad she fell pregnant at such a young age as we can now prepare our future together and have faced the hardest things in life first.

 

Abortion is honestly her decision. She carries the baby and delivers it, its literally a part of her so you can only express your opinion on the situation and hope she agrees. but not ready to be a father? you'd think you would be more responsible during sex if that was the case but its not my business. And i wish you luck sir

 

The child is "literally" a part of both of them, not just the mother. They both have the right to make decisions on behalf of their child before the child is born and after the child is born. Although the decision to go through the procedure of getting an abortion would only be up to the mother they both have, or should have a say in the matter. As for him needing to be more "responsible" during sex, I'd say it takes two people to make a child so the responsibility doesn't only involve him. The expected mother could have been more responsible with using preventive methods as the expected father could have been as well, to blame him for creating the child just wouldn't be fair.

As for your question I think you should honestly just discuss your feelings with her and explain why you think it wouldn't be the best idea for you to have a child at this point in time, while at the same time listening to and understanding her point of view on the situation as well. It's both of your decision to make together, as a team. You don't want to force her to do something she doesn't want to do if it turns out that she wants to keep the child.

 

Abortion is her decision, I am however against abortion. It is practically murder. Abortion will ruin the mother's body in the long run. You, as the father have absolutely no right to say that the child should be aborted. I'm sorry if this isn't the answer you want to hear, but oh well ... such is life.

 

The child is the both of theirs and they both need to make the decision together, though in the end, it is ultimately her decision. What you do will depend on what happened as well. If you decided to have the baby and are now backing out, you will probably need to have a good amount of involvement with the baby. If, say, the condom broke, i would doubt that you would have to have a large role in the baby's life. Although, you may need to help pay for the child.

I would also stress what the previous users have posted about discussing this with her. Do this first and foremost.

 

This is something you and your girlfriend need to sit down and have a serious talk about. It's between you and your girlfriend, and no one else.

 

I want some updates on this! But being serious, why risk even putting yourself in that position to be a dad when you have no intentions to be one?

Seems pretty selfish tbh

 

My man once upon a time I was in this same position I was 17 years old selling pounds of weed driving a kick ass BMW M3 then I had found out I got my girlfriend of 3 years pregnant at the time instantly I started becoming the biggest pile of shit ever I started dating strippers blowing all my money at a strip club doing other drugs then just smoking weed and after a lot of harsh reality checks when my son was 3 months old I started coming back around and getting more involved now im almost 20 and my son is almost 2 and I don't regret being involved in his life at all hes by far the best thing that happened to me a total reality check and motivation to grow up and do better for myself, now I run a runescape hustle making a couple grand a month off the game while im doing concrete flat work IRL. At one point in time we we're looking into families for adoption even and we sat down talked with a few and at the time I blew it all off like it was a big deal and now some time later looking back on the situation if I would've given my son of for adoption or went with abortion I really dont know where I would be at today or if i'd even be here today. Dont make a decision you're going to regret sometimes its best to take the rough path tough it out through the bullshit get as much help as you can from others and step up to the plate make that money and provide, trust me if and once you do it you'll feel like 10x more of a man. I went from selling weed and washing dishes for $7.25/hr to making $600-$1000/wk on RS and making $2000/every two weeks doing concrete and you can do it to my man! Best of luck to you and your family to be.

 

I love it. So how old is the kid now?

 

I personally think you should have a long think about it and make sure it's what you really want... And if it is, then sit down with her and try to explain it in a caring way.... If you quoted yourself here, and said "especially not with you", I doubt it'd go over very well.... But with the right approach you may both be able to agree on something.