Should I contact her?

[Lambda]

Going to try and make this as brief as possible.

My ex and I broke up about 6 months ago. We dated for a year and nine months. We agreed to talk again once it felt right. We broke up because she was going to college and I understood her reasoning.

About two-three months back she unblocked me on facebook. I immediately noticed this because she liked her moms status which I commented on and my facebook said, "**** likes ****'s status." I flipped out and contacted her days later saying "hi."

We talked on facebook messages for a few days, I spilled my guts (saying how I missed my bestfriend), she didn't reply, I wrote another message back saying how I took a stab in the dark messaging her and I shouldn't have spilled my guts and that if she ever wanted to talk again, to message me because I failed.

She messages me back 3 days later saying how she wants to talk about us talking again, but she's too caught up with finals and college course work to think rationally about her feelings. I replied with okay, just message me when you're ready to talk. She messages me back a few hours later asking, "can we just talk about random stuff like then?"

So for 2-3 days we talk about random things. Then she stops replying, completely. I send another message asking if she's going to reply because I feel like I'm watching paint dry. (I wasn't thinking well)

It's been 2-3 months since our last message. It's really starting to bug me inside.

Did I do something wrong? Does she feel bad leaving me on a cliff hanger and is too ashamed to reply? Should I just keep on waiting? I just miss my old friend... Any ideas? :|

If I do message her, I was thinking about saying something around, "Hey, so I'm not sure if we haven't talked because... but if you want to talk just message me because I don't think that I can do this again." OR possibly message her and keep it super casual.

Not sure.

Sorry for the length. Input is appreciated.

 

[Brendan]

2-3 months, that's a rather long time for not speaking to you without giving you any notice. I don't think it can be the fact that she's doing College work still and decided to stop using Facebook to study or something. Maybe drop her a line asking how College went/is going?

 

[Sanctuary]

Yeah, I'd try to play it smooth. Just ask an innocent question, see if she answers that.

Goodluck!

 

[Illuminati]

if you think its worth it message her, im in that same situation atm, we dated for 2 years we broke up, some shady shit happened, im debating at the moment if its possible or worth it to be her friend still, hard to say if you can really put teh shit behind you do it.

 

[Siinep]

I understand where shes coming from. I'm currently in college and in a relationship for about the same time. College honestly does put unnecessary stress on every aspect of your life. It seems to me that shes not that interested in you any more but you are almost still head over heels for this girl. It also seems that in a way you cannot let her go. So she finally unblocked you on FB, that's not a sign saying come back to me, it could be just a nice gesture saying that you may not deserve to be blocked because you DID share a part of your life together for a while, but it's not the open doorway to say, come back into her life. I say this because, at college you're forced to make new friends, meet knew people - it's the only way to survive college; having people there for you and others to talk to.

What I think you should do is just leave it to what it is. A real test for you would be to see if she contacts you instead of you contacting her. The way you described your conversation, I feel that you overwhelmed her at the time, and she didn't care to listen to what you had to say. She's moved on and I think you should too. There's plenty of others out there, let the right one find you.

 

[Lambda]

What I think you should do is just leave it to what it is. A real test for you would be to see if she contacts you instead of you contacting her. The way you described your conversation, I feel that you overwhelmed her at the time, and she didn't care to listen to what you had to say. She's moved on and I think you should too. There's plenty of others out there, let the right one find you.

I should've listened to you.
I sent her a message and it's been almost three days with no reply.
:\

 

[Siinep]

I should've listened to you.
I sent her a message and it's been almost three days with no reply.
:\

I'm sorry to hear man. It just seems like you are still obsessed with her, and after 3 days, she would have said something back if there was anything there. Don't worry about it man, just move on and I can guarentee you will find the right one for you. It's not your fault about anything really, it's just she lost interest in you over the period of time, and she thought maybe you would have done the same, but instead you are still trying to talk to you but thats not what she wants so she is ignoring you.

It happens to everyone man, take it slow, and move on.

 

[†Tysonâ€Â]

Sorry but she's probably found another guy or something which is why she hasn't replied. Since she doesn't know how you'll handle it or anything, or she just doesn't care about talking to you now that she's with another guy.

I'd send her a message saying 'you're a bitch', and never talk to her again. Forget about her, though if you want to get her back, the best thing is not to contact her. Let her contact you.

 

[I Only Sell]

This was me about a year ago. What you want to do is just keep busy. I can't tell you to stop thinking about her, because that's impossible, but if you keep busy, you'll think less of her. Also, talk to other girls.

I'm not telling you to burn bridges, but just live your life. Don't contact her. If she contacts you, that's great. If she doesn't...oh well.

lots of fish out there if you just talk to people. It's funny when you start looking for another girl, you could never find her. Then when you finally stop looking, she finds you

 

[Lambda]

Then when you finally stop looking, she finds you

This is what I've heard and it gives me hope.

It happens to everyone man, take it slow, and move on.

Would you suggest blocking her?

 

[xyammahax]

Dont look for the perfect one theyll find you. Honesly, I've been there bro. What you gotta do is find a new hobby. Play runescape/wow/sports/goto school. Get successful in life and show her what she missed out on just let her go man its hard but move on theres someone better out there she obviously doesn't deserve you I am here if ya need it

 

[AfterLyfe]

This is what I've heard and it gives me hope.



Would you suggest blocking her?

No don't block her. Blocking people is a horrible idea for any boy, because girls LOVE to spread rumors. I am not trying to be hurtful just honest. Keep her on your list, and pretend like you don't care about her anymore. Eventually if she wants you she will come to you. If she does do a little bit of the "hard to get" routine, just don't be a asshole about it.

Although it sounds wrong, I got back with one of my ex's once by sending her pictures asking what clothes I looked best in because I was going on a date.


But, if she doesn't come back, there are plenty of other people.... It sucks but its part of life

 

[Matt Hasty]

She just wants to be friends and thinks you want something more. There's nothing you can do but move on, she's busy with school and has a lot of stuff on her mind.

I think if you really want to just talk to her wait until the summer.

 

[Npapadopulos]

This may be kindof harsh... But I think you need to move on. What you're doing now is really only making you seem needy/clingy. You guys will go your separate ways once you get into college and I think you need to do exactly what she has done-move on.