How bad did I mess up

cliffs

-be me on a Tuesday night
-drunk and can't find bottle opener, decide to use the counter top to open said beer
-put beer lid on edge of counter and yank down as hard as I can
-beer cap flies at my face with the force of 1000 virgins
-hits my eye and somehow cuts my face
-I start vomiting all over my floor
-a part of me wants to smell and have this liquid back inside of me, I get a spoon and taste the liquid which was once a part of me
-my window is open, girl in the apartment next to me was walking past my place and saw all of this happen, we made eye contact and she looks as if she wants to cry
-I tried to run after her, but I slipped in my pile of vomit and just lay there hoping this is all a dream
-it's not a dream
-this girl liked me and I don't know what to do now

Wat do guys??

 

So if I got this correctly, she watched you trying to eat your own vomit with a spoon?
Hmm. No chances at all

 

My grandfather always told me, "If she doesn't love you when you're eating your own vomit with a spoon, then she isn't worth it."

Fuck her man, feminism is crazy.

 

if girls want equal rights they can get equal lefts

 

just tell her u were drunk. chicks dig that bad ass stuff.
and she's done worse i bet she sipped period blood from a fork or something. idk girls are weird.

 

what did the vomit taste like btw

 

just beat the shit out of her for spying on you lol

fucking NSA is getting bold

 

One time i was sober, started kissing a girl, she vomited in my mouth. Woops

 

dude you didnt fuck up at all, she wanted to cry with happies.

you did good son.

 

Thanks for the support guys.

 

Wait am I reading this right...?


YOU DIDN'T OFFER TO SHARE?

 

Explain to her that you were cleaning the floor off with a spoon and your mouth so that you guys would have a clean place to fuck. duh

 

easy answer here..give said girl flowers with vomit in the vase

 

Tell her it was your twin brother who lives far away and was visiting for one day only.

 

this is no support section

 

no support, OP is a faggot. Wait...

 

Lmao you fucked up son