No More Appologies

I posted this a while back, but it contained a large ammount of flaming and "f" words. But here it is, intellectually discuss.

Normally, a conversation about a friend hurting a friend would go like this:

*dudeA punches dudeB in the stomach while playing around*
*dudeB actually loses his wind, can't breath, and falls to the ground*
*dudeA's reaction is to fall to the ground, and help dudeB up*
*dudeA repeatedly says "Sorry" in an attempt to comfort his friend, and fix the situation*
*dudeB manages to shake it off, and gets back on his feet*
*both dude's laugh it off, and "sorry" fixed the situation*


That's nice right? It works like that quite often, but really, it's not a very good thing. If you re-read, you can see the point I am going to convey later. dudeA intentionally punched dudeB in the stomach. This shows that his action was in fact what he wanted. However, dudeB's reactiong was not intended. So dudeA, in response to dudeB's reaction, jumps to dudeB's aid and trys to fix the situation. He repeatedly says "Sorry" and helps his dudeB get over his pain. dudeB gets up, and they share a laugh. That shows that simply helping another, and appologizing will fix nearly any situation.

Let's see what would happen if he hadn't appologized:



*dudeA punches dudeB in the stomach while playing around*
*dudeB actually loses his wind, can't breath, and falls to the ground*
*dudeA's reaction is to fall to the ground, and help dudeB up*
*dudeB manages to shake it off, and gets back on his feet*
*dudeB punches dudeA in the face, and they both fight till one goes down completely*


Now, "sorry" seemed to have helped the situation in the first example, however, "sorry" in the scheme of things has given these two "friends" immunity from each other. Basically it's saying "if I appologize to you, you'll forgive me. And likewise". This can be seen as good, but how good is it, when the other friend does something serious and appologizes.


What I am saying is an appology has gone so far as to corrupt society. "Sorry" is looked at as a get out of jail freecard, and an attempt to save someone's own ass.


"Sorry" can be accepted, however, only in situations where harm was not intended, or accidents did not occur. An accident does not merit an appology, because the person doing so is only "sorry" that they had done it or that they could get into trouble. If it is intended, then you cannot be sorry that you had done so.


I understand there are those who are truly sympathetic, however, the majority of appologies heard today, are merely to save oneself from harsh judgement or bad reactions.


Discuss.

 

Sorry, but your going to die...
Like that?
I have noticed the same thing in my english class and it is really very funny. Someone does something and the teacher yells at them, but the first reaction for the student is to say "Sorry". The teacher is smart and instantly replys with "No your not! Otherwise you wouldnt have done it!"

But still what are we meant to be discussing?


I know you are a smart person, but I don't suppose you could lay off posts like this a bit? All it ends up with is a massive brawl and people calling one another noobs. You should realise that, Yes today's society is corrupt, But do you really think all your threads about this is going to help? People who are mentally restrained are always going to remain that way. Everything these days are all about a "Quick fix" its what humans enjoy (I Think???). Humans don't care about who gets harmed or whether something is morally right. If saying "Sorry" fixes something then thats what humans will do, its a quick and easy way out of things. Yet I find it funny, that your trying to explain all this to a bunch of 13 - 17 year olds. If you haven't noticed most young people are blind when it comes to emotions or body language. Same goes with sorry. It gets the job done and hardly anyone would care who gets hurt as long as they get what they want.

Maybe you should try discussing this on a far more mature forum? One of those ones with a "No Shit" policy? You know, where there are no morons to be found?

If you think this post was off topic, I'm Sorry....

 

I completely agree with you, and trust me, that forum is in the making .

And yes, I understand them not getting it, and my threads not assisting. One can simply do, and hope a single person is changed.

If that can be accomplished, my deed is done?

 

Nice theory DF

 

I think that sorry will always be your first reaction no matter what you do.

 

No Mage, mine is to discuss the situation. IRL I never say "sorry". I do say "please" and "thank you" a lot, but that's the same story.. used to get what you want..

 

I like these threads of Deacons
they Give me stuff to read and sometimes learn

This is so true, i think now days its pathetic how "sorry" is said when its not meant, especially in schools and around teachers as said in Sparq's post

I would be honest, if the situation is not bad and can be helped with a 'sorry' then i do say sorry sometimes, but not like 'sorry get up now ull be fine im sorry see' lol but if it was like serious i would just let things run through :\ because i DID do what i was intended without thinking of saying sorry afterwards.

 

yeah sorry doesn't save the world =P.

 

meh i disagree.

if he punches him while playing around and then apologizes, he didnt mean it and therefore did not intend harm to the other dude

 

i think that in this world most people wouldn't take sorry for an answer i mean if i were to get real hard...i am sorry but man your going down and if i really dont know you much theres not much of a chance for "sorry's"

 

It really depends on the person if there easily tricked by fakes "sorrys" likes that or if they are just plain dumb. If I do something bad not like something small I usualy don't say sorry until I think about for a couple hours or even sleep and in the morning im sure what I did was wrong but that doesen't mean aw hes sorry lets let him/her off the hook. A real sorry should only be said when you accept what you did was wrong and ready for the punishment. Then there is saying sorry by doing something on accident lets say you bump into some person holding hot coffee and it spills all over them if you really mean it when you say sorry then dont fucking walk away help them clean it up somehow alot of people would just walk away like nnothing happened. thats just how I feel and will people really flame for this lol I think they would have to be dumber than mike Tyson to do that

 

Maybe dude B didn't get the wind knocked out of him and he knew he was just messing around

 

i you say sorry you may sound like a chick

 

Imo, "Sorry" is wayy over rated, it's to much of a reprive from anything.