I've noticed one thing about this very confusing subject. It evaporates, and it regenerates. It truly is the slowest form of suicide. No longer has lust entered the picture. This is true. This love is above none. Nothing I've ever felt before can topple this. I never knew it was possible to love like this. This love, it is such a great feeling. It is such an empty feeling. One of desperation. Not many know what it feels like to be on the edge of breaking down. They've never been there. They've never felt the pain of a broken promise. Of a hoodwinked heart. A torn heart. A heart scar'd forever by the stratches of an outside force. I know what it's like. To have a void love. A love peirced by the very arrows that you've sent out to protect it. A non-existant love. It takes two, and unfortunately, I am one. I am one, alone, forever. How it pains me to say forever. Love, so far, has been a test. One that I have been doing my very best up uphold, and mantain at a steady pace. I fear that I am losing grip on myself. On reality. What am I to do?
There. Where does this unending love come from? I can't quite place it, yet, nor could I get rid of such a feeling., I would not want to. I thought myself love stricken. I know I am. Am I too young to know the intruding feeling of love? Perhaps. However, I do believed I'd matured much to know how to open my heart at the right moments. I love her/him, yet, he/she'll never understand. To him/her, I'm just another love-sick idiot who's only trait needed is that of friendship. As I've grown out of the "old days", these become my new days until I am older. I want to be with him/her, and every second that I'm not, I feel myself being stabbed with the fact that he/she does not want me. When I note the first thing that I think of in the morning, it is no lie. I think of him/her. Him/her when I get dressed. Him/her when I take a shower. Him/her when I'm in class. The denial is never-ending, like an immortal soul , trapped in a hole for all eternity, never to regain a state of sanity. Am I too far gone? Maybe this is just the beginning. Maybe he/she's blind. Maybe I've only just scratched the surface.
i need you. theres no other statement that could describe this undeniable feeling of desperation, wanting, and simply love. my heart belongs to you. no other place. when i'm around you, i'm around "you". not you and whoever else is there. i only see you. you don't know the feeling that i get when i wake up, think about you, only to realize that you didn't wake up thinking about me. the one you want to think about you does. i'm not angry, though. i understand the bond of love that can surge between two people. i get it, and i try my best not to squeeze in between that. i can only sit back and wait, right? time heals all wounds, i suppose. well, what's more powerful? time or love? these things confuse me. it's not like an expectancy for you to do something about that feelng that resides in me, but it still hurts, nonetheless. this pain may be for the greater good, but that does not stop it from hurting. completely understandable, though. what is that greater good? for me, it is that you are happy. for you, it is that you are happy. quite simple, and yet, terribly complex. i miss you. i miss your touch. i miss your kisses. i miss your hugs. those things gave me my oxygen, and i barely have any of them, now. i suppose i'm just simply not good enough. it's nothing YOU should feel bad about, but me. i can be better, but i don't know how. it's nothing new. i know the story.
i just wish i could rewrite it.
Saving this in a place other than my computers memory, for reasons. I won't say no need for comments, because obviously, it doesn't work like that. Just something I feel like updating every now and then.
There. Where does this unending love come from? I can't quite place it, yet, nor could I get rid of such a feeling., I would not want to. I thought myself love stricken. I know I am. Am I too young to know the intruding feeling of love? Perhaps. However, I do believed I'd matured much to know how to open my heart at the right moments. I love her/him, yet, he/she'll never understand. To him/her, I'm just another love-sick idiot who's only trait needed is that of friendship. As I've grown out of the "old days", these become my new days until I am older. I want to be with him/her, and every second that I'm not, I feel myself being stabbed with the fact that he/she does not want me. When I note the first thing that I think of in the morning, it is no lie. I think of him/her. Him/her when I get dressed. Him/her when I take a shower. Him/her when I'm in class. The denial is never-ending, like an immortal soul , trapped in a hole for all eternity, never to regain a state of sanity. Am I too far gone? Maybe this is just the beginning. Maybe he/she's blind. Maybe I've only just scratched the surface.
i need you. theres no other statement that could describe this undeniable feeling of desperation, wanting, and simply love. my heart belongs to you. no other place. when i'm around you, i'm around "you". not you and whoever else is there. i only see you. you don't know the feeling that i get when i wake up, think about you, only to realize that you didn't wake up thinking about me. the one you want to think about you does. i'm not angry, though. i understand the bond of love that can surge between two people. i get it, and i try my best not to squeeze in between that. i can only sit back and wait, right? time heals all wounds, i suppose. well, what's more powerful? time or love? these things confuse me. it's not like an expectancy for you to do something about that feelng that resides in me, but it still hurts, nonetheless. this pain may be for the greater good, but that does not stop it from hurting. completely understandable, though. what is that greater good? for me, it is that you are happy. for you, it is that you are happy. quite simple, and yet, terribly complex. i miss you. i miss your touch. i miss your kisses. i miss your hugs. those things gave me my oxygen, and i barely have any of them, now. i suppose i'm just simply not good enough. it's nothing YOU should feel bad about, but me. i can be better, but i don't know how. it's nothing new. i know the story.
i just wish i could rewrite it.
Saving this in a place other than my computers memory, for reasons. I won't say no need for comments, because obviously, it doesn't work like that. Just something I feel like updating every now and then.
