Imigrant Parents

[capper4lyf]

Well here we go , Just thought id make this thread to see who else out there has similar problems to this.

Too the point.....
Im 16 years old and a first generation Asian/Kiwi , lived in new Zealand my whole life. Even though my parents have both been in New Zealand for almost 20 years they know very little English . All the problems i have i cant tell them because of the limited English they speak and i didn't pick up enough Chinese to tell them that way either. Through my whole childhood life i was never shown the family intimacy normal parents would there wasn't any hug or just the words i love you son and it was very hard to communicate about anything with Mum . I was having a rough time taking this in and the divorce because i never got to spend time with my dad after that . This also affected the way i was at school sometimes . So i decided to get a translator to explain to mum how i felt . She then misunderstood and thought that i was having a rough time at school and that was the main problem.

I later talked to some one else about this and they said , this is common amongst Chinese parents because at that time my mum was growing up in china there was a great depression amongst the whole country and that they were never taught to show any family Intimacy to their children ,And that is there's a clash between the 2 different cultures im being brought up in.

What really annoys me about my mum is she eats rice for all 3 courses and doesn't realize i don't wanna eat rice but her simple response is you should be eating rice its healthy. I agree its healthy but its simply not the food i intend on eating everyday of my life.

Anyways enough about my problems tell me yours , if any relating to misunderstanding with parents.



SERIOUS COMMENTS ONLY
Will report any offensive or off topic comments .

 

[Appeal To Reason]

That's a tad unfortunate but your only 16 and are at the age where you will start to make your own decisions in life, choosing to eat rice or not to eat rice should be your own decision.
I'm lost for words at this moment in time so I cannot offer any more advice and by the way I think this thread should maybe be in this sub-section: http://sythe.org/forumdisplay.php?f=527

 

[Rhodesy]

That sounds horrible, not being able to speak to your parents fully. Why don't you get them to learn English?

 

[Upfired]

It's sad to hear that. Not communicating with your parents or having them show their love for you.

 

[1234567ASDF]

You should learn to be more independent.

Rice is awesome, but in reality you should make your own meals and explain to her that you need to be more independent.

 

[HamJam]

My parents are from a different background and speak a different language from me but I seemed to have picked up the language they speak and they understand english but can't really speak it that well.

What you shouldn't do is not talk to them or cut off ties because that would be terrible, you're best to live the way they are/ want you to live (within reasonable grounds).

Also about the rice, I like rice and if you don't want it everyday then go to the shop and get a pizza n make it for yourself (its quite easy).

Hope I helped.

 

[MoJoRuDeBoY]

dude man i feel for you, not being able 2 talk 2 ur parents properly is really sad, what you need to do is find a way of communicating with your mum and tell her how you really feel, that's the only way you can solve this

 

[capper4lyf]

dude man i feel for you, not being able 2 talk 2 ur parents properly is really sad, what you need to do is find a way of communicating with your mum and tell her how you really feel, that's the only way you can solve this

Yeah i have tried communicating with a translator but still they don't get it because their from a different cultural background and has different views on things then i do.

That sounds horrible, not being able to speak to your parents fully. Why don't you get them to learn English?

Well Mum did go to an English school for 3 years but it didnt help considering she doesnt use english in her daily life. She sticks around the people she knows (other Asians) .

That's a tad unfortunate but your only 16 and are at the age where you will start to make your own decisions in life, choosing to eat rice or not to eat rice should be your own decision.
I'm lost for words at this moment in time so I cannot offer any more advice and by the way I think this thread should maybe be in this sub-section: http://sythe.org/forumdisplay.php?f=527

Yeah Ive been told that im getting to an age where i should start learning to be more independent but the thing is Ive never really had anyone to really depend on .