This actually happened. Next person who he snitches on, report him! Freeeeedommmmmm.
3) The post must be the first reply in a thread, with simply the word "first" for the quote to count. You can lead a post by saying "first" and continue with whatever reply you wish, but IT MUST CONTAIN "FIRST"
I'm sorry, I thought you were running this competition? Can't even follow the rules... First has to be capitalized.
I was sitting in my basement pleasuring myself to pictures of Semper. It was a good time, like every other. I was very close to the end, and I was feeling great. All of a sudden I heard a knock at the door. "Semper?" I called, hoping it was him and he knew what I was doing to the pictures of him and wanted to do it in person. "Nope, it's Pete," replied Pete the mail man. I throw on my pants quickly and run upstairs to the door, tripping over my erect penis.
I open the door, and to my surprise, it's not Pete the mail man, it's Laptop. I start to freak out (as any person would do if you came across him). He told me it was okay, that he was only there to drop off a letter. He handed me a sealed envelope, took a look at my erection, smiled a bit, then walked away slowly.
This envelope was the least of my worries, so I set it on the counter and went back to what I was previously doing. After 2 and a half hours of that, I returned to find the letter. I found it in pieces all over the floor, my dog Friskies had ripped it up. I quickly put it back together and read it, it was a legal contract signed by an attorney stating that Laptop would never again enter the spam forum, and that he would never report anyone for anything ever again, his dick sucking days were over.
I've re-created the letter below to the best of my ability, although it was kind of difficult to put semen stains in the same spots that Laptop had put them when he sent it to me.
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