- Joined
- Jun 26, 2010
- Sythe Gold
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- 847
Step 1: When shopping for bananas avoid mistaking them for plantains.
Imagine all the fruits in the universe form a male body; the penis of the body would be a banana and a plantain would be an African penis.
Furthermore, look at the sign in the store to stop confusion.
Step 2: Make sure to eat the banana while its yellow. If your mum forces you to eat a 1/2 black banana kindly refuse.
Step 3: Peel the banana
Some people prefer to peel the whole banana and eat it, whilst other peel as they go.
Standard banana peeling technique
Preferred method: Firmly bend the stalk back at the end of the fruit, and pull backwards and down against the fruit.
Optional method: Grasp the stalk of the banana, hold it while you replicate the action of throwing it, make sure to hold the stalk.
Step 4: Remove the banana strings as you go, it gives a better taste and keeps the banana clean.
Step 5: There are several methods to eat a banana, however I will only write about four methods:
Eat the banana as you go: Take a bite and another bite until you are finished with the banana.
The whole banana: Stuff the whole banana in your mouth and swallow it.
The licky flicky: Make sure you are next to a pretty girl: Gently stroke the banana, flick your tounge on the tip of the banana while licking it, repeat till the banana vanishes.
The blow: Make sure you are next to a big breasted female. Hold the banana from the end, in a fist formed position.
Open your mouth wide, move the banana inside your mouth and pull it out again. Repeat.
Step 5: Finally you are finished eating your banana.
Throw the skin in the trash bin, or throw it infront of a car (if you have played Mario kart you know the banana leaves disappear) you can also just leave it in on the ground in a crowded area.
Step 6: Walk away proudly with your victory over the banana
