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Hiring Bodyguards [Apply Inside]

Niki

Most trusted and best looking

$200 USD Donor New
Joined
Aug 21, 2008
Sythe Gold
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2,369
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Doge
Heidy
MushyMuncher
Sythe Awards 2017 Winner
Due to recent threats made against me by a sythe user and potential incoming heat from moderators I am now hiring bodyguards to ensure my safety. Those that are hired will be paid much better than livechat wages and multiple currency options are available. If you'd like to apply please fill out the information below.

UPDATE: Those that are hired will also be receiving a TBD amount of sythe gold. Truly incredible applications will also earn an outstanding minirank.

Current Members of Niki's ELITE Guard:
Basement
DaltyF
Buyacc
Talon
Mootrucks
Wintastical
Sneaky Fish5

Application


Physical body height:

Physical body weight:

Combat Experience:

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat

2. Healing Ability

3. Use of armed weaponry

4. Getaway driving

5. Autism
 
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I assume I'm still your number one henchman, correct?

I would apply but my autism is of such a high level that I do not comply to your normie standards of "applications".

Thus you should consider the following quote from my mentor an application.

Fuckers in school telling me, always in the barber shop Chief Keef ain’t bout this, Chief Keef ain’t bout that My boy a BD on fucking Lamron and them He, he they say that nigga don’t be putting in no work SHUT THE FUCK UP! Y'all niggas ain’t know shit All ya motherfuckers talk about Chief Keef ain’t no hitta Chief Keef ain’t this Chief Keef a fake SHUT THE FUCK UP Y'all don’t live with that nigga Y'all know that nigga got caught with a ratchet Shootin' at the police and shit Nigga been on probation since fuckin, I don’t know when! Motherfuckers stop fuckin' playin' him like that Them niggas savages out there If I catch another motherfucker talking sweet about Chief Keef I’m fucking beating they ass! I’m not fucking playing no more You know those niggas role with Lil' Reese and them
 
how much do i get paid
 
Application

Physical body height: 5'9

Physical body weight: 200 lb

Combat Experience: Veteran

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat 10 - I knock mf's out breh

2. Healing Ability 8

3. Use of armed weaponry 10

4. Getaway driving 7

5. Autism 5
 
Doge
Heidy
MushyMuncher
Sythe Awards 2017 Winner
I assume I'm still your number one henchman, correct?

I would apply but my autism is of such a high level that I do not comply to your normie standards of "applications".

Thus you should consider the following quote from my mentor an application.

Fuckers in school telling me, always in the barber shop Chief Keef ain’t bout this, Chief Keef ain’t bout that My boy a BD on fucking Lamron and them He, he they say that nigga don’t be putting in no work SHUT THE FUCK UP! Y'all niggas ain’t know shit All ya motherfuckers talk about Chief Keef ain’t no hitta Chief Keef ain’t this Chief Keef a fake SHUT THE FUCK UP Y'all don’t live with that nigga Y'all know that nigga got caught with a ratchet Shootin' at the police and shit Nigga been on probation since fuckin, I don’t know when! Motherfuckers stop fuckin' playin' him like that Them niggas savages out there If I catch another motherfucker talking sweet about Chief Keef I’m fucking beating they ass! I’m not fucking playing no more You know those niggas role with Lil' Reese and them
Superb quality and a great example of an outstanding application. Accepted.

how much do i get paid
This position will be based off of incentive pay. The better you perform the more money will rain in.
Application

Physical body height: 5'9

Physical body weight: 200 lb

Combat Experience: Veteran

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat 10 - I knock mf's out breh

2. Healing Ability 8

3. Use of armed weaponry 10

4. Getaway driving 7

5. Autism 5
That is an incredible height to weight ratio. You seem to show extensive knowledge in the skills department. This application is under further review.
 
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Application

Physical body height: 186cm

Physical body weight: 95kg

Combat Experience: kickboxing

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat - Easy - 10

2. Healing Ability - Know them first aid - 8

3. Use of armed weaponry - Skilled in gun fighting - 8

4. Getaway driving - Got car and drivers license so all set - 9

5. Autism - Yes - 10
 
i need bodyguard too but you sont need to be that big i just need someone to drive me around you feel
 
Pizza Muncher
Christmas 2016
Application

Physical body height: 186cm

Physical body weight: 95kg

Combat Experience: kickboxing

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat - Easy - 10

2. Healing Ability - Know them first aid - 8

3. Use of armed weaponry - Skilled in gun fighting - 8

4. Getaway driving - Got car and drivers license so all set - 9

5. Autism - Yes - 10
Lose some weight cow
 
Doge
Heidy
MushyMuncher
Sythe Awards 2017 Winner
Application

Physical body height: 5'9

Physical body weight: 200 lb

Combat Experience: Veteran

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat 10 - I knock mf's out breh

2. Healing Ability 8

3. Use of armed weaponry 10

4. Getaway driving 7

5. Autism 5
After further review your application has been accepted, congratulations!

Application

Physical body height: 186cm

Physical body weight: 95kg

Combat Experience: kickboxing

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat - Easy - 10

2. Healing Ability - Know them first aid - 8

3. Use of armed weaponry - Skilled in gun fighting - 8

4. Getaway driving - Got car and drivers license so all set - 9

5. Autism - Yes - 10
I know you're certainly not lying when you score yourself a 10/10 for autism, other skills are looking sufficient as well. Congratulations, your application has been accepted!
Application

Physical body height:6'1

Physical body weight:73kg

Combat Experience: none

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat 0

2. Healing Ability 0

3. Use of armed weaponry 0

4. Getaway driving 0

5. Autism over 9000
I'm sorry but I can not accept your application due to you wishing I killed myself. Bodyguards are supposed to care about the well-being of the one they're protecting and for this reason I can not hire you.

I will be sending sythe gold to the newly initiated as your starting pay
 
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Physical body height: 250

Physical body weight: 6'5

Combat Experience: black belt in jujitsu and world heavyweight champion 2015 UFC

1. Close quarter combat - 10

2. Healing Ability - 8.5

3. Use of armed weaponry - my fists are the only armed weaponry i need

4. Getaway driving - 3, please let someone else do this for personal reasons

5. Autism - 10
 
Doge
Heidy
MushyMuncher
Sythe Awards 2017 Winner
Physical body height: 250

Physical body weight: 6'5

Combat Experience: black belt in jujitsu and world heavyweight champion 2015 UFC

1. Close quarter combat - 10

2. Healing Ability - 8.5

3. Use of armed weaponry - my fists are the only armed weaponry i need

4. Getaway driving - 3, please let someone else do this for personal reasons

5. Autism - 10
Those are incredible body proportions. And since you were the 2015 heavyweight champion you are indeed Fabricio Werdum, yes? Nice signature, accepted. Pleasure to have someone of your notoriety on our elite task force.
 
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Application

Physical body height: 5 foot 9

Physical body weight: 80 KG

Combat Experience: Basic MMA Skills

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat
8
2. Healing Ability
7
3. Use of armed weaponry
5 (australia doesn't have guns, but we are fucking great with knifes)
4. Getaway driving
6 (motorbike ofc)
5. Autism
10
 
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Physical body height: 6'4

Physical body weight: 102.75 pounds (currently bulking)

Combat Experience: ~500,000 kills on Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3

Rate these skills from 1-10:

1. Close quarter combat - 9/11

2. Healing Ability - bad

3. Use of armed weaponry - american

4. Getaway driving - i simply don't care about my surroundings

5. Autism isn't real it's just bad parenting
 
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