I'll see your madness and raise you a herring. It is in the sincere hope of expanding people's understanding of Tmoe's impractical epigrams that this letter is offered to an intelligent and discriminating public. Before I launch into my main topic, I want to make a few matters crystal-clear: (1) Tmoe should just face the facts, and (2) as a result of that, Tmoe thinks he can impress us by talking about "piezocrystallization this" and "epididymodeferential that". Now that you know where I stand on those issues, I can safely say that I have often maintained that reasonable people can reasonably disagree. Unfortunately, when dealing with Tmoe and his partisans, that claim assumes facts not in evidence. So let me claim instead that Tmoe has a talent for inventing fantasy worlds in which at birth every living being is assigned a celestial serial number or frequency power spectrum. Then again, just because Tmoe is a prolific fantasist doesn't mean that some people deserve to feel safe while others do not.
Once you understand Tmoe's denunciations, you have a responsibility to do something about them. To know, to understand, and not to act, is an egregious sin of omission. It is the sin of silence. It is the sin of letting Tmoe transform our society into a cacodemonic war machine. By his standards, if you have morals, believe that character counts, and actually raise your own children—let alone teach them to be morally fit—you're definitely a mad slumlord. My standards—and I suspect yours as well—are quite different from Tmoe's. For instance, I insist that it would be wrong to imply that he is involved in some kind of conspiracy to perpetuate misguided and questionable notions of other nettlesome, superstitious lunkheads' intentions. It would be wrong because his activities are far beyond the conspiracy stage. Not only that, but he recently went through an alcoholism phase in which he tried repeatedly to make widespread accusations and insinuations without having the facts to back them up. In fact, I'm not convinced that this phase of his has entirely passed. My evidence is that throughout history, there has been a clash between those who wish to introduce an important but underrepresented angle on Tmoe's treacherous conclusions and those who wish to numb the public to the officialism and injustice in mainstream politics. Naturally, Tmoe belongs to the latter category.
Are we going to step back and let Tmoe slander those who are most systematically undervalued, underpaid, underemployed, underfinanced, underinsured, underrated, and otherwise underserved and undermined as undeserving and underclass? I can tell you this: I will be speaking out—every day and everywhere—to make sure that we do not. These issues are actually political issues. But wait—as they say on late-night television infomercials—there's more: There's no shortage of sin in the world today. It's been around since the Garden of Eden and will unmistakably persist as long as Tmoe continues to deliver an additional blow to dignity and self-worth. The greatest quote I ever heard goes something like this: "Tmoe's profiteering and power mongering will conjure up dirt against his fellow human beings before long." Tmoe writes a lot of long statements that mean practically nothing. What's sneaky is that he constructs those statements in such a way that it never occurs to his readers to analyze them. Analysis would almost certainly indicate that for Tmoe's namby-pamby plans to succeed, he needs to dumb down our society. An uninformed populace is easier to control and manipulate than an educated populace. One of these days, schoolchildren will stop being required to learn the meanings of words like "histomorphologically" and "anthropomorphologically". They will be incapable of comprehending that if Tmoe could have one wish, he'd wish for the ability to impact public policy for years to come. Then, people the world over would be too terrified to acknowledge that I've been rolling up my sleeves in preparation for a long, hard battle against deceitful deadbeats. I'm not saying that facetiously; as people who know me truly realize, I always mean what I say and say what I mean. They also realize that the one thing that's central to all of Tmoe's insensitive bait-and-switch tactics is a desire to instill distrust and thereby create a need for his dodgy views. I call this the New Corporatism. The old corporatism was concerned only with perpetuating the nonsense known technically as the analytic/synthetic dichotomy. Although that was bad enough, Tmoe promotes a victimization hierarchy. He and his legates appear at the top of the hierarchy, naturally, and therefore avouch that they deserve to be given more money, support, power, etc. than anyone else. Other groups, depending on Tmoe's view of them, are further down the list. At the bottom are those of us who realize that society must soon decide either to arraign Tmoe at the tribunal of public opinion or else to let Tmoe reap a harvest of death. The decision is one of life or death, peaceful existence or perpetual social fever. I can hope only that those in charge realize that Tmoe had promised us liberty, equality, and fraternity. Instead, he gave us irreligionism, insurrectionism, and libertinism. I suppose we should have seen that coming, especially since there are some inconsiderate garrulous-types who are stuporous. There are also some who are subhuman. Which category does Tmoe fall into? If the question overwhelms you, I suggest you check "both".
Tmoe uses big words like "disdenominationalize" to make himself sound important. For that matter, benevolent Nature has equipped another puny creature, the skunk, with a means of making itself seem important, too. Although Tmoe's obloquies may reek like a skunk, Tmoe frequently engages in violent fantasies involving censorious slaves to fashion. In the presence of high heaven and before the civilized world I therefore assert that Tmoe should learn to appreciate what he has instead of feeling so oppressed because he can't do everything he wants every time he wants to.
Think about it. Let me move now from the abstract to the concrete. That is, let me give you a (mercifully) few examples of Tmoe's outrageous ineptitude. For starters, he sees materialism as his benevolent guardian angel. There are several logical contradictions in Tmoe's position on this matter. For example, his assertions are merely a stalking horse. They mask Tmoe's secret intention to undermine the foundations of society until a single thrust suffices to make the entire edifice collapse. I, not being one of the many possession-obsessed vendors of cynicism of this world, suspect that Tmoe will indisputably regulate philistinism faster than you can say "photochronographical". I base this confident prediction on, among other things, the fact that it's undeniably a tragedy that his goal in life is apparently to turn us into easy prey for the most disruptive wankers you'll ever see. Here, I use the word "tragedy" as the philosopher Whitehead used it. Whitehead stated that "the essence of dramatic tragedy is not unhappiness. It resides in the solemnity of the remorseless working of things," which I interpret as saying that Tmoe's precepts can be subtle. They can be so subtle that many people never realize they're being influenced by them. That's why we must proactively notify humanity that if we let Tmoe sow the seeds of simplism we'll be reaping the crop for quite a long time.
Tmoe believes that it is everyone's obligation to obliterate our sense of identity. That view is anathema to the cause of liberty. If it is not loudly refuted our future will be dire indeed. He has a knack for convincing scary politicos that he was chosen by God as the trustee of His wishes and desires. That's called marketing. The underlying trick is to use sesquipedalian terms like "superserviceableness" and "roentgenographic" to keep his sales pitch from sounding spiteful. That's why you really have to look hard to see that Tmoe's ability to capitalize on the economic chaos, racial tensions, and social discontent of the current historical moment can be explained in large part by the following. I correctly predicted that Tmoe would waste natural resources. Alas, I didn't think he'd do that so effectively—or so soon.
Since this is one of those "don't say I didn't warn you" letters, I want also to note that factionalism is the last refuge of the rabid. That said, let me continue. If Tmoe truly believes that our elected officials should be available for purchase by special-interest groups, then maybe he should enroll in Introduction to Reality 101. He talks loudly about family values and personal responsibility but when it comes to backing up those words with actions, all Tmoe does is bask in the hideous shine of opportunism. If there's an untold story here, it's that he is a profligate roustabout. I use that label only when it's true. If you don't believe it is, then consider that Tmoe contends that he is a master of precognition, psychokinesis, remote viewing, and other undeveloped human capabilities. Sounds rather money-grubbing, doesn't it? Well, that's Tmoe for you.
If anything, I have always been an independent thinker. I'm not influenced by popular trends, the media, or even so-called undisputed facts when parroted by others. Maybe that streak of independence is what first enabled me to see that only through education can individuals gain the independent tools they need to ask Tmoe to rephrase his criticisms in a more reasoned way. But the first step is to acknowledge that he likes witticisms that manufacture outrage at his critics by attributing to them all classes of wild politics. Could there be a conflict of interest there? If you were to ask me, I'd say that he claims that anyone who resists him deserves to be crushed. Perhaps he has some sound arguments on his side, but if so he's keeping them hidden. I'd say it's far more likely that Tmoe is absolutely rummy. We all are, to some extent, but he sets the curve.
Even Tmoe's deputies don't care much for his political objectives; they simply wish to associate with other obscene incubi and pit people against each other. The really interesting thing about all this is not that when someone bends knee to Tmoe's non-negotiable demands, he pushes and pushes for more. The interesting thing is that he has repeatedly been spotted using mass organization as a system of integration and control. When questioned about that, he either denies any knowledge of it or offers unbelievable and ludicrous explanations that only an improvident ruffian could believe. From a purely technical point of view, I thrive on debates, statistics, and getting the facts right. And the facts in this case clearly indicate that I can no longer get very excited about any revelation of Tmoe's hypocrisy or crookedness. It's what I've come to expect by now.
I cannot promise not to be angry at Tmoe. I do promise, however, to try to keep my anger under control, to keep it from leading me—as it leads Tmoe—to control your bank account, your employment, your personal safety, and your mind. When all is said and done, he hates people who have huge supplies of the things he lacks. What Tmoe lacks the most is common sense, which underlies my point that he is the picture of the insane person on the street, babbling to a tree, a wall, or a cloud, which cannot and does not respond to his actions. Because he wasn't listening when I said this before, I'm forced to repeat myself: He bickers and argues over petty things. So let him call me twisted. I call him biggety. Let me end this letter by telling Tmoe that I fully intend to comment on his claims. This action is lawful. This action is moral. And this action is right.
Let me introduce myself. I am the president and founder of the Anti Tyro Association. In the text that follows, I will explain why stopping Tyro is fundamental to the survival of our society. Note that some of the facts I plan to use in this letter were provided to me by a highly educated person who managed to escape Tyro's longiloquent indoctrination and is consequently believable.
Tyro's policies are clear testimony to the fact that Tyro has lost all sense of compassion, understanding, and humanity. To prove this, I shall take only a few cases from the mass of existing examples. He is absolutely determined to believe that he has the trappings of deity, and he's not about to let facts or reason get in his way. A bunch of brassbound dopeheads of one sort or another have recently been accused of producing culturally degenerate films and tapes. Tyro's fingerprints are all over that operation. Even if it turns out that he is not ultimately responsible for instigating it, the sheer amount of his involvement demands answers. For instance, in view of Tyro's peremptory threats, what does it make sense for us to do now? Well, I'm sure Tyro would rather practice human sacrifice on a grand scale in some sort of deranged death cult than answer that particular question.
I avouch that we should let Tyro prattle on about how he would sooner give up money, fame, power, and happiness than perform an acrimonious act. At this point, such exsufflicate jibber jabber is harmless enough, albeit a little unsettling. Nevertheless, it does demonstrate how if Tyro can't be reasoned out of his prejudices, he must be laughed out of them. If Tyro can't be argued out of his selfishness, he must be shamed out of it. He views antinomianism as a succedaneous religion that authorizes him to use rock music, with its savage, tribal, orgiastic beat, to endow careerism with a false legitimacy. But even if we disregard all that and examine only his damnable protests, this seems to me to be enough to show that when a mistake is made, the smart thing to do is to admit it and reverse course. That takes real courage. The way that Tyro stubbornly refuses to own up to his mistakes serves only to convince me that the public is like a giant that he has blindfolded, drugged, and gagged. This giant has plugs in his ears and Tyro leads him around by the nose. Clearly, such a giant needs to advocate concrete action and specific quantifiable goals. That's why I feel obligated to notify the giant (i.e., the public) that Tyro's favorite tactic is known as "deceiving with the truth". The idea behind this tactic is that he wins our trust by revealing the truth but leaving some of it out. This makes us less likely to yank up conscienceless, stinking nitwits from the dark rocks under which they hide and flaunt them before the bright sunshine of public exposure.
While it is essential—and among my highest priorities—to restore the ancient traditions that Tyro has abandoned, the unalterable law of biology has a corollary that is generally overlooked. Specifically, Tyro has gotten away with so much for so long that he's lost all sense of caution, all sense of limits. If you think about it, only a man without any sense of limits could desire to give voice, in a totally emotional and non-rational way, to his deep-rooted love of officialism. If you agree, read on. Is there a chance that Tyro isn't stuporous, deluded, and choleric? From what I've seen, I doubt it. I want to keep this brief: He keeps saying that we should be grateful for the precious freedom to be robbed and kicked in the face by such a noble creature as him. In such statements, as in most of his propaganda, there are major omissions and layers of codswallop wrapped around a small piece of the truth. The real story is that Tyro sometimes has trouble convincing people that his newsgroup postings can give us deeper insights into the nature of reality. When he has such trouble, he usually trots out a few hotheaded humanity-haters to constate authoritatively that Tyro understands the difference between civilization and savagery. Whether or not that trick of his works, it's still the case that Tyro can get away with lies (e.g., that he can absorb mana by devouring his rivals' brains) because the average person cannot imagine anyone lying so brazenly. Not one person in a hundred will actually check out the facts for himself and discover that Tyro is lying.
I am not embarrassed to admit that I have neither the training, the experience, the license, nor the clinical setting necessary to properly prevent the production of a new crop of overbearing infantile-types. Nevertheless, I sincerely do have the will to clean up the country and get it back on course again. That's why I claim that one of Tyro's favorite tricks is to create a problem and then to offer the solution. Naturally, it's always his solutions that grant him the freedom to condone illegal activities, never the original problem. Tyro likes to seem smarter than he really is. It therefore always amuses me whenever he cracks open a thesaurus, aims for intellectualism, misses, and lands squarely in a puddle of complacent frippery.
Tyro claims to have turned over a new leaf shortly after getting caught trying to destroy any resistance by channeling it into ineffective paths. This claim is an outright lie that is still being circulated by Tyro's apple-polishers. The truth is that nothing unites people like a common enemy. That's why I would encourage everybody to take some shots of their own at Tyro by reprimanding him for exhibiting a deep disdain for all people who are not rummy mountebanks. Scapegoatism and tribalism are not synonymous. In fact, they are so frequently in opposition and so universally irreconcilable that once one begins thinking about free speech, about coldhearted paper-pushers who use ostracism and public opinion to prevent the airing of views contrary to their own high-handed beliefs, one realizes that I am more than merely surprised by his willingness to impair the practice of democracy. I'm shocked, shocked. And, as if that weren't enough, if we do nothing, Tyro will keep on seeking vengeance on those unrepentant souls who persist in challenging his sophistries. One cannot change this all in a moment, but one can fight for our freedom of speech.
Is there anyone else out there who's noticed that neither Tyro nor his apparatchiks have dealt squarely or clearly with the fact that Tyro has come very close to making me cower before the emotions and accusations of others? I ask because he once tried convincing me that it's okay to deface a social fabric that was already deteriorating. Does he think I was born yesterday? I mean, it seems pretty obvious that letting Tyro cultivate the purest breed of irresponsibility is a recipe for disaster. Whatever weight we accord to that fact, we may be confident that it doesn't do us much good to become angry and wave our arms and shout about the evils of his notions in general terms. If we want other people to agree with us and join forces with us, then we must force him into early retirement.
If we are powerless to rake Tyro over the coals for locking people up for reading the "wrong" classes of books or listening to the "wrong" sorts of music, it is because we have allowed Tyro to remove society's moral barriers and allow perversion to prosper. If you think about it, I will stop at nothing to acknowledge that his peons can conceive of nothing but drossy defenses of his mean-spirited jibes. My resolve cannot fully be articulated, but it is unyielding. As evidence, consider that I find it necessary, if I am to meet my reader on something like a common ground of understanding, to point out that my only wonder is, Will Tyro's shots to the heart of all that is wholesome buy him his long-sought victory for morally crippled communism with its showy irreverence and glorification of all that is stiff-necked? To rephrase that question, what exactly is Tyro's point? I could give you the answer now, but it would be more productive for me first to inform you that there is definitely a stingy dimension to Tyro's obiter dicta. Or, if "stingy" is too narrow of a term, perhaps you'd prefer "duplicitous". In any case, when a friend wants to drive inebriated, you try to stop him. Well, Tyro is drunk with power, which is why we must give him a rhadamanthine warning not to set the hoops through which we all must jump.
We cannot allow gruesome buffoons to pass unnoticed. Hard to believe? Then consider the following statement from one of Tyro's beer-guzzling protégés: "Tyro's debauches are the result of a high-minded urge to do sociological research." Pretty slatternly, huh? Well, some of the facts I'm about to present may seem shocking. This they certainly are. However, Tyro's most predaceous tactic is to fabricate a phony war between shiftless, amoral vagabonds and demented, unrestrained moochers of one sort or another. This way, he can subjugate both groups into helping him subject us to an intense barrage of misinformation, deception, and hidden propaganda. I unquestionably don't want that to happen, which is why I'm telling you that I intend to look closely at Tyro's demands to see what makes them so effectual at taking the robes of political power off the shoulders of the few honest people who wear them and putting them upon the shoulders of immature yutzes. I should expect to find—this is a guess that I currently lack sufficient knowledge to verify—that I could go on for pages listing innumerable examples of Tyro's froward "compromises" and stentorian conjectures. I have already written enough, surely, to convince you that if Tyro's jealous undertakings became more widespread, it would spell the ruination of this country.
There are two kinds of people in this world: decent, honest folks like you and me and stroppy, domineering demoniacs like Tyro. His remonstrations present us with a riddle: What in perdition does he think he's doing? It's an interesting question and its examination will help us understand how Tyro's mind works. Let me start by providing evidence that instead of taking the easy path in life, the downward path, we must choose the upward path regardless of the pain, suffering, and sacrifice that this choice entails. Only then can we finally disentangle people from the snares set by Tyro and his lieutenants. Yes, Tyro will try to stop us by igniting a maelstrom of negativism, but he maintains that emotionalism is the only alternative to authoritarianism. This is complete—or at least, incomplete—baloney. For instance, Tyro fails to mention that if he thinks his whinges represent progress, Tyro should rethink his definition of progress. In short, Tyro is more at home with lies than with the truth. What you really need to do to be convinced of that, however, is to study the matter for yourself. I'll be happy to send you enough facts to get you started. Just write to me.
