fight with girlfriend. please read.

[bruza727]

Me and my pregnant girlfriend had an altercation, long story short she slapped me across the face in reaction I grabbed her hand and put it beside her in restraint and to stop her from striking me again, in result of this I had injured her finger resulting in some bruising and swelling, I walked away and she persisted to follow me, I had a duty of care even though she had hit me, she was pregnant and I love her so I took her home, the next morning we woke up and another argument started, this was due to me suggesting she went home as I was really angry about last night and what had happened, things were thrown at each other I restrained her by placing my hand on her upper arms and sitting her down on my bed, she wouldn't leave, we were both in tears extremely emotional I had shown some aggression which i believe scared her, we were both hysterical, it was a weird overload of emotions.. Anyway the police were called by 3rd party, she was taken to hospital due to the state she was in crying, obviously the baby was under stress and her finger was hurting, the police took her statement and shockingly she had said I had kicked and punched her stomach, I was remanded in custody and charged with two counts of ABH, My trial is at the crown court which I chose to take it there to prove my innocence but if I am found guilty of these charges I am facing jail.. And more importantly I will miss the most crucial part of my daughters life, I've already misses 6.5 months of the pregnancy due to bail conditions of no contact, this has destroyed me.

I was wondering if anyone had any knowledge of experience on the subject, is jail a certainty? BTW I live in the UK so laws and procedures may be different if you are in another part of the world.

Any feedback would be much appreciated.

 

[Skittlez]

I don't know if the UK picks sides over gender, and are more inclined to take a womans side. If they do, I would get a lawyer, if there's no photo evidence and no bruising around her stomach. Usually a lawyer can chop it up to a argument with a very emotional pregnancy and you won't face any jail time. But you should have walked away even ran away if she was hitting you. Its screwed up but your not gunna win in that kind of situation.

 

[bruza727]

I don't know if the UK picks sides over gender, and are more inclined to take a womans side. If they do, I would get a lawyer, if there's no photo evidence and no bruising around her stomach. Usually a lawyer can chop it up to a argument with a very emotional pregnancy and you won't face any jail time. But you should have walked away even ran away if she was hitting you. Its screwed up but your not gunna win in that kind of situation.

Yeah its true, I actually did run just to defuse the situation but it was late at night and crazily she ran after me and I didn't want her running, I guess ill have to accept the consequences.

 

Unfortunately, considering you have a history in jail, your chances aren't looking very good. She may be seeing what happened as a sign that you two are done, and by doing this she thinks it will get rid of you, and you will no longer be apart of her life.

My best advice is to talk to her. No lawyers or anything, and just ask why. Try to convince her this isn't what you deserve. Maybe you two split for good, but you don't deserve the jail time.

 

[bruza727]

Unfortunately, considering you have a history in jail, your chances aren't looking very good. She may be seeing what happened as a sign that you two are done, and by doing this she thinks it will get rid of you, and you will no longer be apart of her life.

My best advice is to talk to her. No lawyers or anything, and just ask why. Try to convince her this isn't what you deserve. Maybe you two split for good, but you don't deserve the jail time.

Hey man, I'm sorry but I think you read my post wrong, I haven't ever been to jail, it was just when I was arrested after the fight they put me in jail for a night then sent me to court, I have no previous convictions.

 

[ASAPgang]

Hey man, first of all, how's it going?
I'm a 2nd year law student from NZ, so in no way should you take what I'm saying as exhaustive - take it with a grain of salt as you will. ABH, I assume you mean assault occasioning bodily harm? I was once charged with this for an incident that occurred when I was 16-years-old. I was found not guilty on the basis of self defence. With your previous history, prior convictions and aggressive nature (dependant on how bad her statement is) you could be looking at jail time but I'd suspect the judge may be lenient and offer a suspended sentence for something like a year. Again, I don't know the circumstances or extent of her claim.

I assume your bail conditions are set as such that you can't communicate with the defendant? If that is the case then I'd duly advise you not speaking to her or circumnavigating the restrictions in order to benefit your case - as such this will only be found out and will land you in a worse off position.

I truly hope you have not made a statement to the police as this is the first thing any lawyer will tell you not to do. Don't talk to the police, don't self incriminate yourself. If I was in your shoes, I would claim the truth, go to trial and bring forward a defence argument of self-defence or 'battered man syndrome'. Have a look into that and let us know how you go.

 

[bruza727]

hey asap, I appreciate the response and knowledge you are willing to share,

I haven't got any previous convictions im clean.

basically all the court have is the fact I hurt her finger, but she told the police that she struck me first causing me to do this, also she has withdrawn her statement but the police wont accept it as they think she is doing this out of fear, its crazy how the prosecution service will prosecute someone for the sake of it. hit me back if you see this.

 

[ASAPgang]

Hey bro. With no previoua convictions if found guilty you'd probably end with a suspended sentence of sort. If she's stated she struck you first then fear not, it is an act of self defence or restraint for that matter to stop her from doing it again. The prosecution seem like they have no grounds and it might not even go to trial.

EDIT: Another thing, is it a requirement in the UK to prove mens rea and actus reus for ABH charge?

 

[deadmou5e]

you might not face any serious jail time, if any. you should talk to your girl if you can to see how she's going to proceed in the court. my friend went through this with 3 charges in Canada and he only got probation, but the lawyer was expensive. you def should look into a good lawyer if you can afford it. best of luck

 

[ASAPgang]

Hey man, how's it all going with this? Just checking in to see you're doing all good. Let me know what's happening, sling me a PM when you get this.

 

[Sellwud]

Hello I'm sorry to read this. I just had my baby.. And the women in general still crazy. When and after pregnancy they all are the ducking hormones fk em . I would seriously get rid of her if she's going to act like that on many accounts I know it's hard coz she's pregnant but that situation ain't good for the three off you.. About the court case. U can claim free legal aid and get a duty solicitors in court and while in being arrest they are good coz they know there shit. Got me off few times. Where abouts in the UK u from?

 

My friend has gone through this already, his girlfriend said he beat her.
He was proven innocent for the shear fact she didn't have a mark on her.

Unfortunately it's a very bias world we live in and the woman is always assumed to be the one telling the truth. In your case, they will check her stomach and see everything is fine and they'll know she's lying.

Make sure you present yourself well/dress nicely and keep calm in court.
If she flips her shit and you keep calm, it looks bad on her.
Say to the court that you'd never do anything that would risk harming your child.

Make sure you get a solicitor and you'll be fine. The finger could go against you, but you can always say she did that hitting you, as an injury on the hand is often due to them doing the attacking.

 

[bruza727]

Thanks for those positive replies I appreciate them all, I am from London by the way and am represented by a solicitor, they don't seem to good but hopefully they are working hard on my case because we haven't been in touch much.

 

[ASAPgang]

Those things that Shoop pointed out are simple yet true. The whole idea of making yourself look appealing at a court house is a must do. Don't be one of those dudes who pulls his dads 3x too big suits out either.

and to reiterate on what Shoop has said RE: it's always perceived that the man is the one beating the women. This couldn't be more correct. In New Zealand, the law, specifically Crimes Act, the relevant charge was "male assaults female" but never did it declare a charge for female assaults male. This has since been changed, but the idea and chain of thought is still there.

 

[samrobinson1991]

I was recently on jury service in crown court, and will say appearance only effects the women jurors, so dress smart as they will be the ones who will automatically form an opinion on what you are accused of, and how you look.

 

[Andre8Johnson0]

If you didn't hit her, and you're in legal trouble because she said you did, I would not hesitate to leave her when this is all said and done, baby or not.

 

[Service CT]

I'm having to go back to court myself after an apparent domestic case and will probably end up service my 12 weeks suspended sentence in prison because of it. Girls are nothing but hassle.

- I got done for it last year in which i ended up being remanded in the police station for 3 days as it was the weekend, sadly i had 3 women as the judges on court day and they remanded me in Bedford Prison for a few weeks, Then put on tag for 6 months and then sentenced me to a 2 year suspended sentence along with probation for 2 years and on a course for most of that time.

Like yourself i was innocent as it was more her hitting me and i only pushed her to defend myself but because i had already been done for it with the same girl before ( i retaliated ) it looked terrible on me. I met her before court and as she was pregnant and crying saying she didn't want to stand up in court against me etc i just changed my plea to guilty and yeah, While she now has it good it's ruined my life for the moment..

Also from England near London so i know what your going through...Just make sure you look sorry and even cry if you have to lol but depending how serious the case is you should only get a sentence like myself of about 3 months which you'd serve about a month and half of that.

- I'm awaiting court to send me a letter so i'm enjoying the days while im out and not locked up! :/