EXTREME Laziness is causing a massive problem

Ok, it feels really weird putting this stuff for people I don't know well to see, but this is better than Yahoo Answers. lol. I would really appreciate it if you read & replied, even if you were to tell me that I'm a lazy cunt faggot that should crawl into a hole & die.


So, I've been having laziness problems ever since I came to Egypt(2008, age 12). Before moving here(from New Jersey) I was the most active kid ever. My foreign friends & I all agreed that when we came to Egypt we became lazy, suddenly. I'm not sure if it's loss of motivation or what, but that's what happened. Anyway, my mom is always telling me to do stuff around the house.. My laziness + bad memory makes it very hard to do this stuff.

Things as simple as taking out the trash or picking up some clothes around the house feel like climbing a mountain. This is EXTREME laziness; like i'm convinced that I could be one of the laziest teens on the planet.

Back to the story.. Last night my mother asked me to take the trash out & take my clothes out of the washing machine. I said I'd do it, and she went to bed. Being me, I forgot to do it.

I woke up in the morning and heard she was doing something in the kitchen. I went to ask her if I could go to a friend's house, and found her crying. She said "If I was told that I would raise a child that wouldn't do anything I asked him to do, I would never believe it." I immediately started apologizing and started running around doing the things she asked me to do.

I feel as if I'm a heavy burden to my mother, being that she's a single mother with me. My father is in New York with a family of his own. I CAN go live with him, but there are soooo many cons that come with that. He is heavyyyy on religion(Islam), meaning I can't listen to music(also meaning I can't MAKE it, which is my life dream), have to go with him to a mosque 5 times a day, and I won't have anything(cause he's extremely cheap). I've tried overcoming my laziness countless times, but it doesn't seem to work. I'm feeling like going to my father is the only way to help my mother, but I will be miserable with him.

Advice?
Finding a solution to the laziness would make my life so much easier.


Thanks for reading, it means so much.

DubstepGuru

 

Well.... You clearly know that you should help your mother from what I read, so I'd just try to find your willpower and do what needs to be done. If you left, she would still need to do those things herself but then she'd be lonely because it would be just her there.

 

Although most of what you said is true, she wouldn't have as much to do.. cleaning wouldn't be anything because I wouldn't be there to leave any mess, any dishes, any garbage.

 

For the lazyness, you have to motivate yourself with something, it can be anything! like goals you want to reach in life, music, hobby's...

about your memory, I have the same issue as you, My short term memory is F*cked, how to solve it? use post-its, or your phone,
if my mom/dad ask me to do something, I use my phone and set an alarm
when I have to do it. Believe me, it works great

(And don't just appologize to your mom, and start doing everything she asked,
try talking to your mom, and explaining your problem, and if she could help you (like saying it more then once etc...))

 

The reminders seem like a great idea. I'll try it!

I've talked to my mom countless times about my memory & laziness, I believe she thinks I'm lying & just trying to get a way out of situations.

 

I definetely understand you as its something that I myself experience daily and situation like the one with your mom have went through my life a lot of times. The best thing you can do is try to beat that laziness, you just need to put effort and demostrate her that your not lazy! Maybe you dont have to help her in everything, but for example you can clean up your house without her telling you to do it. You will be surprised on the happy reaction she will have when she sees this. Start helping out, it's your mom and she does everything for you, the less you can do is give her a hand.

 

Sometimes laziness is a direct link towards depressions, which in this scenario i would say is the main cause.

You left home, comfort, friends, for someone new, unpredictable and dull. It appears to me that you're just in a minor slump of depression. We all can give you tips on not being lazy; Sleeping, dieting, washing your face, etc. Instead I'm going to give you advice and help on depression.

First you must address the issues with your mother, tell her you believe your laziness had developed because of the depression that has formed while you've been there. If you do not address the problem in front of you it will only make it worse. Perhaps your mom is provoking your depression which ladders into my next method; Working it out. Keep a journal or some way to keep track every time your laziness is at its all time high, that way you can go back and read to determine whether its something your mother is doing or you. If it is something she is doing you can discuss it with her and conclude a compromise to help your depression.

Don't elude my suggestion of depression, everyone gets it eventually (even me). You need to address it now before it continues to something worse.

I understand why you could be depressed, in New Jersey you had something to look forward to when you woke up, there is a empty void of space from what use to be time consuming gone.

 

@Pure Thanks for the advice.

@Lilly That could very much be the case, but if I AM depressed, I don't know it. Isn't that unusual? Most people realize when they're depressed, right? I have great friends here & everything, I'm not having any problems in life(EXCEPT for this laziness). I can't see myself being depressed(although I do feel really exhausted even after long nights of sleep, & I have eyebags that NEVER leave.. I don't know if that pertains to depression or not). Either way, thanks for this exceptional advice.

 

Depression comes in many forms, some people can acknowledge they're depressed as some cannot, which takes time to process.

You mid could be missing something back home, stuck on a figure or idea that your body cannot grasp, causing you depression.

 

Is there something making you lazy as in say are you spending way to much time on the computer or playing video games which is causing you to not care about anything ells? Something that works good for me is exercising and eating healthy keeps me active and I just feel a lot better overall.

 

I personally think that she was just a bit frustrated at the time and thinking of everything wrong with her life.

If you really want to not become lazy, you're going to have to FORCE yourself not to be. I had to do the same thing.

Good luck man.

 

Just get in a daily routine of taking the trash out, doing your laundry and keeping your room clean. Since you enjoy music so much just pop some headphones on and take 30minutes out of your day to do those chores without her even having to ask.

 

Like Lilly said it sounds like depression and you wouldn't know you have depression. More info is needed probably about your feelings and stuff. From the looks of it you are beating yourself up for letting your mother down. Going to be with your father I doubt would fix anything depression or not. I would talk to your mother about maybe goign and talking to someone about these things or maybe even just sitting down with your mother and talking to her about things that are bothering you if that seems to be the case. If you don't find yourself feeling sad and life is fine besides the laziness and memory thing maybe you are just a lazy person with a bad memory but there are things and people who can help you with those things. Help you set goals for yourself and set up your own methods to help you remember things like the alarm idea.

There are tests online you can take for depression. They aren't like as accurate as a physician would be but it might help you see if depression is something you are suffering from. Also the results either way does not mean you either have or don't have depression. For facts on depression the Mayo clinic website has tons of information about all sorts of things.

 

Dang that sucks man. you moved to Egpyt from Jersey? I'm currently living in Jersey now and couldn't love it any more