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Emotional Time

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Skizzed

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I'm only 15 and it feels like I have gone through so much shit. I feel as if I'm 40.

I was born from an immature 19-year-old mother (she's 33 now, and is a great mother, don't get me wrong) and never grew up with my biological father. I now live with my step-dad and mother. Shit just isn't going good for me right now (this isn't some suicidal note, just so you know).

Aside from that, my grandparents made my childhood, who I am today, and I will never forget what they have done for me when they're gone. They are both in their early/mid 50's and have been, what seemed to be, happily married for just over 30 years. I grew up with them, we did so much together. I remember going to a place called Niagara Falls (just over an hour drive from where I'm located in Canada) almost a dozen times a year. We shared great memories. My grandfather taught me life lessons, he taught me how to swim, ride my bike, and be a special person. My grandmother is a very fun person to be around, and has always been there to comfort me when I needed it most.

My grandmother has always seemed to be depressed, she couldn't sleep at times. I never thought it would have escalated to what it has today. She asked my grandfather for a divorce just over a month ago. Their house is on the market, and my life has been falling apart right infront of my eyes for as long as I can remember. We talked and I told her, "as long as I see you both, and you stay in my life, it won't change a thing". As far as I know, some comments were made about my grandmother that were hurtful, and I can understand. In just a weekend's notice, she's moving halfway across the country (to Nova Scotia, Canada. I live in Ontario, Canada) to attend her mother's (my great grandmother's) last years. She is moving there permanently. She told us she would visit us every several months. I can't watch my family break apart right infront of my eyes like this. It's too hard to cope with. All of these great memories together hold my childhood together, give me something great to remember and cherish my whole life... gone.


What can I do to convince myself everything is going to be ok? What can I do to keep my mind off of this?

Thank you in advance.
 
Honestly the best thing to do is to get help. Yes this is hard to lower your pride and ask for help, but he does help. Also remember you arent the only one that feels like this and that has this going on.

As myself im almost in the same situation and i honestly havent gotten help myself but i know that it will help.

Hit me up if you need anything dude. Pm/Msn
 
Thanks alot, Trey. I might hit you up on MSN to talk further. Thanks for the advice, bro.
 
You're at a very tough age in your life. You have to remember that life isn't easy and though things won't be the same as they were, they will always get better. I was about your age when my grandmother unexpectedly died and it also caused my family to fall apart even more. She was the most important person in my life and had such a huge impact on me and everyone around her. It's taken years for things to get better, but I've seen people in my family change so much and come together for the first time in their lives. It's crazy how the worst thing you can imagine happens and yet so much good comes out of it in the end. You just have to be strong and get through it. Not only should you think about all the positive things in your life now, but everything you have to look forward to as you grow up. Time is the greatest cure out there.
 
Rather than trying to keep your mind off it, I recommend the very opposite. Allowing yourself to feel is one of the most important treatments for the soul. If you find yourself feeling sad, allow yourself to feel it. Explore the emotions rather than seeking escapism in some sort of contrived joy. Your predicament is not dissimilar to the experiences of others within their lifetime. Families fragment and times change. Children cry about it, but adults endure. I hope you will seek to explore emotions in a positive manner.

Thank you for the help Finn. Greatly appreciated :)

You're at a very tough age in your life. You have to remember that life isn't easy and though things won't be the same as they were, they will always get better. I was about your age when my grandmother unexpectedly died and it also caused my family to fall apart even more. She was the most important person in my life and had such a huge impact on me and everyone around her. It's taken years for things to get better, but I've seen people in my family change so much and come together for the first time in their lives. It's crazy how the worst thing you can imagine happens and yet so much good comes out of it in the end. You just have to be strong and get through it. Not only should you think about all the positive things in your life now, but everything you have to look forward to as you grow up. Time is the greatest cure out there.

I'm sorry about your grandmother passing and I'm appreciative of your help.

I'm glad to see caring and helpful people like you two in the community. Much thanks.
 
Continue to spend time with them, and talk to her when she moves
 
Don't let it ruin the good memories that your family had shared together, don't choose sides either. Your grandmother has probably thought very long and hard on this decision, just don't make her feel guilty. Try talking to an adult about all this, if your school has a counselor maybe you should go see them.
 
I've been in a very similar position as you. Well, perhaps not too similar, but similar enough...
My advice is to just let it flow. I know things hurt so much now, but you'll eventually come at ease when things settle down. It may appear as a big change now, but a few months down the road, you'll see, it's not that bad. You also do not need to thrive on the past. It's what causes my depression. Instead of looking back and thinking you're losing a part of your past, just cherish the memories. It's probably for the best, for them.

Sorry if this seemed unclear and unorganized.. Kind of late... If you ever need someone to talk to; PM me. I'll gladly talk to you on msn.
 
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