Depression, Feeling Outta Place.

So im 17 years old, a senior in High School.
Since around the 10th grade ive become very distant to everyone.
My friends, my family, etc.
My life really isn't that bad, i live in a nice home, nice clothes, nice parents, you know a good life.
But its like no matter what is good i still feel like (ima try to explain the best i can) I feel like, this isn't the life im suppose to be living, like i wasnt suppose to be born, not yet and that theres more important things out there for me (afterlife). (Best i could explain it)
The only bad things have happened really that are upsetting badly have happened this year, my senior year.
But since i feel so out of place, i get anger so easliy... like im not scared to fight and get down because my mind is set in stone that im just ready to die.
Like idk i just mentally think horrible things (well not horrible to me, but in societies eyes)
So anyway, has anyone ever experienced what i have, could you give me advice?
I really feel like im gonna snap soon, ive already gotten into 2 fights at school and im on a last warning..
Thanks for taking the time to read this, and thank you for the help in advance..

 

Hey, we all feel that way at some point in our lives. Don't let anyone get you down or try to kick you while you're down. When I was a kid, just about as young as you are now I used to feel like I could live a life so much better. I started running away, doing the stupid old things when I was 15, I finally got landed in group homes and placements until I was 18. It wasn't fun.

And still, after that I still felt like I could live the life I see on commercials and in movies, that happy feeling where nothing could touch me, what you need to do is find something you love to do, or learn something that you think you can love to do and in the longrun it will help, it helped me.

What I'm trying to say is, Not everyone or everything is perfect out there, The world's a cold place and you can only find happiness in the place you put yourself, Build up a stable foundation and try to make the best of it for now, because in the end it'll get better.

 

Hate to say it man, but it's a teenager thing. We all go through and it sucks. Only real advice I can give is just to persevere and make sure you are doing everything you can to ensure a good life for yourself, getting good grades, being healthy and social etc.

I personally have a best mate who sounds similar to you, was always sort of mad in highschool, ended up beating some guy up sending him to the hospital for no reason, he even attempted suicide. Now he's got a great girl and has a baby boy. Things turn themselves around, just give it time

 

What are your hobbies?
Do you think you have an aggressive personality?

Feels like your just going through a rough patch. It'll get better, so try and get through it.

 

Feeling the same way you are man...

There's a light at the end for everyone and it's the kind of shit everyone goes through, don't let it bring you down. Your almost out of school hang in there, stuff gets a lot better after.

 

To everyone who feels like this, don't worry because you are not alone. I used to have moments like this, however mine were different. If you listen to depressing music, change it to some upbeat songs. Music is very powerful to the human brain and sitting alone listening to something depressing will but you in that sad state of mind.
With that being said, also do a lot of social activities. When you exercise, you feel better and your endorphins are released to make you feel good. If I stay inside all day, I feel really sad and the slightest thing will set me off, however if I exercised, then remained in my house for a little bit, I will be okay and get a good nights sleep, etc.

The way you eat also effects how you feel. When you eat healthy, your body has a lot of energy to do these outside activities.

Sorry for the long post, but I am really connected to this and want to help you out.
When you feel the urge to be angry and want to fight someone, turn that energy into something beneficial. Play a sport or start lifting weights. Change your eating habits if thats the case and make sure you get the essential vitamins.

Sleep is important to feeling better about yourself too.

If you need any help or support, feel free to PM me and Ill be more then happy to be by your side throughout this teenage phase.

 

Concerning your fight part, Try anger managment?

 

I've been through that stage already. But for some reason yours is lasting longer?

 

It seems like you are just searching for your own identity, there is more to life than just highschool and once you are done with that you will realize there is a much bigger world than school.

Do you have any hobbies? Anything to keep you active?

 

I went through the same shit at 17... a year and a half later im the biggest pot head around.

weed = fixes all your problems.

not telling you to go out and buy it then smoke it, because that is bad and illegal... but yeah

 

Look man from a person who has been there and has been worse then you and gotten out of it its like this. Quite honestly its kinda a part of growing up and you will grow out of it. some have a worse time then others some dont. I actually had to be on anti depressants to get through it at times . My advice to you is this. keep a good diet. get good excersise. Have good friends and keep in mind "This too shall pass"