This isn't a topic of any fear I have with death. I've found peace with it and I've learned to accept it. This is about death of people close to me. A kid in my home room died of a stroke last year and I didn't feel anything. Nothing. Nothing at all. A kid I talked with all the time, gone. And I didn't feel a thing, even to this day I feel nothing. At the beginning of summer my dog died. A dog I grew up with ever since I could walk. I helped drag her body to the vet and I felt nothing.
This is something I'm scared off. Am I just that insensitive? Am I that much of an asshole? Or am I rejecting my feelings and trying to hide them. Or trying to not develop them in the first place? I've only cried once over a death. And that was in the novel "the outsiders" and in the movie as well. I feel like I've been blessed with a curse. I'm just not sure what to think of it.
This is something I'm scared off. Am I just that insensitive? Am I that much of an asshole? Or am I rejecting my feelings and trying to hide them. Or trying to not develop them in the first place? I've only cried once over a death. And that was in the novel "the outsiders" and in the movie as well. I feel like I've been blessed with a curse. I'm just not sure what to think of it.




























