Blunts.

Let me know what you think?

Non stop blunts, one after another
I got these lightweights, beggin for their mother
Yeah we smoke trees, and we pass 'em to eachother
We roll with swisha sweets, nigga none other
I only get the goods man, I don't fuck with reggie
That shits nasty, it makes me feel edgy
I got the whole click with me, nigga you know
We ridin down the street, smoke out the window
They drop a beat, and I spit my flow
I can't stop, I just let it go
call that premature or whatever you like
Don't give a fuck, you still ridin' a bike
We swing by McDonald's, then to CMart to hit up my nigga Ronald
Get some more swishas and roll another blunt, then go on a hunt
To cure my munchies that I got inside, I don't wanna stop
Let's take another ride
I keep driftin, I keep shiftin, Don't give a fuck, bitch stop trippin
Pass that blunt, let me get another hit
I don't know what I'm saying, I'm just too fuckin lit.

 

need's work on your wordplay bro

 

Yeah I agree with need more work on wordplay, also work on the rhyming a little bit, some bits don't rhyme.

 

Could either of you elaborate a bit more? And I don't really see anywhere that doesn't have a rhyme? And not every line has to rhyme, at least in my opinion, but if you think differently please do say so.

 

When you use either common phrases or commonly used to defintions and twist them to fit what your saying for example a line from fabolous: "my homie told me keep it coming like a horny bitches". Coz horny bitches cum and keep it coming...so keeping making music as much as a horny bitch cums.

ANOTHER EXAMPLE from the one and only LOSO:

"I mean what i say like the dicitionary.
I dont write rhymes, i write obituaries"

^^^^ was off google.

But you need to include more punchlines etc.

 

Alright, I'll work on that. Like I said, my metaphors are at a low and I'm slowly stocking up to see what I can put in. Thanks for the input.

 

i bet your mom would be proud imagine if she read that loooooool