- Joined
- Nov 15, 2010
- Sythe Gold
- 1,682
- Messages
- 5,837
Hey guys, it's been a minute. Over a year already since I admitted to ban evasion and got permanently banned. After a few pardons that had to be put off, I was let back under this new program that Sythe has recently instituted. I realize it is extremely controversial and not everyone will be happy to have me back on here. A lot are worried I will just stay a DNT user forever and not repay a loan I took out with my good friend Time To Buy. I can assure you that will not be the case. We've been really bad about setting deadlines and making payment plans. Unfortunately, during my last pardon, he was limited when I had about half of the debt (700$) to send him. When time passes, the bills creep up. When you're an "old man" like me you'll understand. This is entirely my fault because I should have known under my current budget that it is too difficult to come up with the full amount without it invariably ending up somewhere else.
Just to add full context to the situation: When I took the loan originally, I was living in on-campus housing that was covered by my scholarship/student loans. I had very little costs and a modest job that got things done. Now I am currently living on my own working two different internships I hope to turn into full time gigs. I travel a lot for work and probably more than half of the time I am away from home. Being graduated, all sorts of expenses now crop up. About what you'd expect, rent, food, utilities, misc. and those pesky student loan bills are all debts I accrue and owe nowadays. My tunnel-vision was extremely foolish in taking on such a big loan from TTB. Only those closest to me on this website know why I took the loan. The loan was never even supposed to be public knowledge, but I put it in my thread where I admitted to all my past mistakes (TTB didn't want the general public asking him for loans after as a result of mine). I make enough to live on my own and pay all my bills, barely. I'd say as I currently stand I am barely above the poverty line. About where I expected to be post-graduation unless I got real lucky with a good job.
Ultimately, what I learned the most was that borrowing money is, almost 100 percent of the time, a stupid thing to do. In hindsight I should have looked into a bank loan or something as simple as a credit card to get the job done. My biggest mistake on Sythe wasn't the evasion or the original thing I got banned for (owing 10 dollars or something small like that), it was this loan. It was a big mistake, I know it was a big mistake, and I regret making this mistake. But I do want to point out, slightly in my defense, that I was never banned for this loan. I was banned for evasion. The loan was not set to mature until long after I was banned (Jan 2016). Unfortunately, after it matured, problems still arose, which is why I really regret borrowing the money in the first place. GP has over halved in value, my bills have all increased ten-fold, and my current jobs are barely above minimum wage because they are only internships (I was lucky to even find any internship paid tbh). Obviously, the blame is 1000 percent on my shoulders. The only thing TTB is guilty of is being too understanding. We should have been more forceful on a simple payment plan and a lot of this could have been avoided. I wish I could use this wisdom for later on down the road, but I will never again borrow money from a friend. It never ends well.
Lastly I will add that while I made a slew of mistakes I do not think I am a bad person. The original ban from Sythe was when I was a dumb 15 year old kid with a really loose grasp of morality and integrity/business ethics. Now, however, my youth is all but gone and I realize if I cannot restore my image on a simple internet forum I really should be ashamed of myself. People that know me know I take things really personally and I can assure you not a day went by in my ban period that I looked back on my mistakes with disdain. Now, I did offer some good things to this site during my tenure here. I was a sectional mod and I took pride in it. Unfortunately I did not come by it entirely honest so I never should have been a mod in the first place. But I did not abuse my rank to scam innocent people nor did I scam-quit. Again, the only real "scam" I was ever a part of was on I Want Milz when I wouldn't pay a guy a 10$ gamecard I owed him. The few other scam reports I ever received were for late delivery on stuff or frame attempts (there weren't many, I probably had 4 total or so including the one I got banned for).
I have kept in touch with a lot of you over the past year and I assure you my number 1 objective remains getting fully pardoned/forgiven for my past mistakes. Nobody on this site is perfect and we all make stupid mistakes. It's how you react to/rectify those mistakes that show your true character.
Apologies for the long-winded epistle, but 13+ months is a long time to be absent from anything. All I can do now is fix my mistakes and thank Richard for the second chance. Getting a year off of Sythe really gave me clarity on things. Where I need to improve as a person being the biggest one. Not taking out gigantic loans from friends being another. And coming clean with mistakes before you're about to get caught will result in a lot less headaches for all parties involved. If you've read, thanks. I won't let you guys down again.
Just to add full context to the situation: When I took the loan originally, I was living in on-campus housing that was covered by my scholarship/student loans. I had very little costs and a modest job that got things done. Now I am currently living on my own working two different internships I hope to turn into full time gigs. I travel a lot for work and probably more than half of the time I am away from home. Being graduated, all sorts of expenses now crop up. About what you'd expect, rent, food, utilities, misc. and those pesky student loan bills are all debts I accrue and owe nowadays. My tunnel-vision was extremely foolish in taking on such a big loan from TTB. Only those closest to me on this website know why I took the loan. The loan was never even supposed to be public knowledge, but I put it in my thread where I admitted to all my past mistakes (TTB didn't want the general public asking him for loans after as a result of mine). I make enough to live on my own and pay all my bills, barely. I'd say as I currently stand I am barely above the poverty line. About where I expected to be post-graduation unless I got real lucky with a good job.
Ultimately, what I learned the most was that borrowing money is, almost 100 percent of the time, a stupid thing to do. In hindsight I should have looked into a bank loan or something as simple as a credit card to get the job done. My biggest mistake on Sythe wasn't the evasion or the original thing I got banned for (owing 10 dollars or something small like that), it was this loan. It was a big mistake, I know it was a big mistake, and I regret making this mistake. But I do want to point out, slightly in my defense, that I was never banned for this loan. I was banned for evasion. The loan was not set to mature until long after I was banned (Jan 2016). Unfortunately, after it matured, problems still arose, which is why I really regret borrowing the money in the first place. GP has over halved in value, my bills have all increased ten-fold, and my current jobs are barely above minimum wage because they are only internships (I was lucky to even find any internship paid tbh). Obviously, the blame is 1000 percent on my shoulders. The only thing TTB is guilty of is being too understanding. We should have been more forceful on a simple payment plan and a lot of this could have been avoided. I wish I could use this wisdom for later on down the road, but I will never again borrow money from a friend. It never ends well.
Lastly I will add that while I made a slew of mistakes I do not think I am a bad person. The original ban from Sythe was when I was a dumb 15 year old kid with a really loose grasp of morality and integrity/business ethics. Now, however, my youth is all but gone and I realize if I cannot restore my image on a simple internet forum I really should be ashamed of myself. People that know me know I take things really personally and I can assure you not a day went by in my ban period that I looked back on my mistakes with disdain. Now, I did offer some good things to this site during my tenure here. I was a sectional mod and I took pride in it. Unfortunately I did not come by it entirely honest so I never should have been a mod in the first place. But I did not abuse my rank to scam innocent people nor did I scam-quit. Again, the only real "scam" I was ever a part of was on I Want Milz when I wouldn't pay a guy a 10$ gamecard I owed him. The few other scam reports I ever received were for late delivery on stuff or frame attempts (there weren't many, I probably had 4 total or so including the one I got banned for).
I have kept in touch with a lot of you over the past year and I assure you my number 1 objective remains getting fully pardoned/forgiven for my past mistakes. Nobody on this site is perfect and we all make stupid mistakes. It's how you react to/rectify those mistakes that show your true character.
Apologies for the long-winded epistle, but 13+ months is a long time to be absent from anything. All I can do now is fix my mistakes and thank Richard for the second chance. Getting a year off of Sythe really gave me clarity on things. Where I need to improve as a person being the biggest one. Not taking out gigantic loans from friends being another. And coming clean with mistakes before you're about to get caught will result in a lot less headaches for all parties involved. If you've read, thanks. I won't let you guys down again.
Last edited:
I have faith in you. Keep your head up.
