Life it's self is just stupid. I'm not emo infact I'm a very happy person just the lifestyle I live is so boring. This school year has been shit.
Well since school has started everything has just gone down the drain. I quit smoking todo good in highschool I started off with all A's and as the school year went by they slowly dropped. From A's to C's to C's to F's now it's my first year of highschool and I'm fucked already. I started smoking again. Thought I liked this girl and ended up making out and doing shit with her best friend which I have no clue why. We had a 6 day weekend from snow days. And I wasted it Smoking hanging out with girls (thats not really wasting it) But I'm failing school I have finals tomorrow which I'm going to fail. I'm just not motivated for anything anymore. I'm a spoiled kid. I get whatever I want when I want it. I have this huge house that all my friends think my life is great. But turns out my parents are both alcoholics and I don't have near as good as a life as anyone of my friends my brother even told my mom that she was a diferent person when they were growing up (my 2 sisters Emily, and Abby, and my brother John). When I get an F I nothing happends to me sure I get yelled at abit but I still get my laptop, and xbox nothing seems to phase me anymore. I'm actually scared for my future. I'm not sure what I'm going todo. I'm never motivated to do anything school related which is horrible. I always tell myself I'll do my homework and stuff but when I get home I just skate or sit on the computer and lie to my parents that I did my homework. And I say the same thing to my teacher everyday 'I forgot about it' or 'I didn't understand it' I'm a very smart kid but I just I don't know I'm glad to get this off my chest. I just wish I could be a better person and get good grades but I just can't I'm not sure whats wrong with me.
Well since school has started everything has just gone down the drain. I quit smoking todo good in highschool I started off with all A's and as the school year went by they slowly dropped. From A's to C's to C's to F's now it's my first year of highschool and I'm fucked already. I started smoking again. Thought I liked this girl and ended up making out and doing shit with her best friend which I have no clue why. We had a 6 day weekend from snow days. And I wasted it Smoking hanging out with girls (thats not really wasting it) But I'm failing school I have finals tomorrow which I'm going to fail. I'm just not motivated for anything anymore. I'm a spoiled kid. I get whatever I want when I want it. I have this huge house that all my friends think my life is great. But turns out my parents are both alcoholics and I don't have near as good as a life as anyone of my friends my brother even told my mom that she was a diferent person when they were growing up (my 2 sisters Emily, and Abby, and my brother John). When I get an F I nothing happends to me sure I get yelled at abit but I still get my laptop, and xbox nothing seems to phase me anymore. I'm actually scared for my future. I'm not sure what I'm going todo. I'm never motivated to do anything school related which is horrible. I always tell myself I'll do my homework and stuff but when I get home I just skate or sit on the computer and lie to my parents that I did my homework. And I say the same thing to my teacher everyday 'I forgot about it' or 'I didn't understand it' I'm a very smart kid but I just I don't know I'm glad to get this off my chest. I just wish I could be a better person and get good grades but I just can't I'm not sure whats wrong with me.

