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Regrets

Govind

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When a dictator is in power, there are three kinds of people you'll get:
  1. Those who go down fighting to their last breath.
  2. Those who carry on with life as usual, avoiding trouble if they can.
  3. Those who try to get a piece of the power for themselves.
It has helped me learn about myself a bit, looking back at my actions in recent years...

Time and again, I've told Tyro and others about my lingering feelings of guilt. I had betrayed Tyro out of pure self-interest back in March of last year, sharing private chats he had with me, violating his trust, and damaging the perception the upper administration had of him... and no doubt contributing to his eventual ban. I don't think there's a single conversation we've had since then where I haven't brought that up with him.

I'd done the same thing with Alteranz, too, though the consequences weren't as severe in that case. Then there was Magic Arrow, who I banned, along with other people, for very small reasons.

The only thing I sought to gain by doing these things was greater favor, and power, for myself.

It's become clear to me, though, that the uncaring, Machiavellian approach to success is not for me: having tried it once, over a year ago, it still makes me feel shame, as well the disgust the people I mentioned above must have felt back then.
 
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Gov we all make mistakes, small or large, but please know that I have never held any bad feelings towards you. At the time I was naturally a little unhappy, and I'll put emphasis on how brief that was, but it was also an opportunity for me to realise I had made mistakes and done wrong myself. If I was against anyone ever finding out what I said, I should never have spoken out.
 
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I think we all look back and wish there were things we could change. After I had Alt hammered I was the one to defend him for his unban. One of the better decisions I have made as a staff member.
 
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is this anecdote related to the current tyranny we're seeing
 
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Hats off for posting about it.
 
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Love you Govind.
xoxoxo
 
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