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My Dad

DJ i would say you need to go see your father no matter what he did or didn't do he is your father without him you wouldn't be here and i believe it would help you in the long run that way 20-30 years down the road you won't feel regret for not seeing him for maybe the last time now i normally don't bring this up but i lost my friend,my first crush & apart of myself when she "Ally" 1 year ago passed away & i didn't go to funeral due to just being stupid and not believing it was true and now 1 year later i sometimes just start crying due to regret of not seeing her one last time if i could go back and go i would so please please man go see your dad life is short people fuck up and you just gotta forget all about that and just go trust me it may not affect you now but in the long run it may. *Hugs SanctumX*
 
I really would go if I was you. You only have one dad and imagine telling this story later on to your kids, you'll regret it so much and find yourself even childish for having a fight with your dad. Best of luck man
 
Depending what kind of a person he was during your life should tell you if you need to see him or not. If you need some closure then perhaps it would be a good idea to see him cause once he's gone, you'll never get that chance and you may always wonder what if. What if's are terrible to dwell on.
 
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Yea djweasel, try to make it happen and visit your father. Regret is the one thing in life u don't want to have :/. I really regret something in my personal life and it's something that won't just go away unfortunatly. You can deal with sadness/emotions but regret, that's something different(at least it is for me).
 
Hello there Djweasel,

First of all I am sorry to hear your problem, I read the entire thread and it must be hard to see your dad again after so many years, but you're his son and if he has cancer, in my opinion you should give him some support.

He probably misses you a lot too but you need to understand you're his family and he gave you life, if it wasnt for him you wouldnt be there.

I would say to visit him and speak to him before its too late, but that depends on how was the relation with you before him going to prison. I personally love my family and if my dad was in prison I would atleast go and let him know I am still here for him.
Yea, I've been pondering it for a week or so now.

You said it yourself, you should probably go see him. At the end of the day incarcerated or not he is your dad and severing your relationship with him (as long as he wasn't abusive) isn't healthy for you.
Well I was more or less part of everything, my dad was pretty verbally abusive to me and my mom.

Hey Deezy, long time no talk. :)

We've talked about a lot of shit over Skype, including your father a couple times. Now, I can't tell you what to do, or back it up with personal experience, or connection, but I do feel like you should make an attempt to talk to him Matt.

Just realize, he is your father, and he did bring you into the world, whether you like it or not. Everyone makes mistakes, and does stupid shit. Your best bet is to just look past that. Your dad was caught for molesting a 15 year old. I'm sure he regrets doing the act, and inflicting all the sorrow onto your family and their lives. But just remember, he is still family.

As I said above, try to go visit him in the hospital, I'm sure it will help you physiologically, and it will probably also help him. At least you do get to say that you have a father, and at least he was there for you when you were growing up. Many people grow up without fathers, so just be grateful he's still here, despite the acts he committed.

If you ever need to talk, you still have my Skype. Hit me up. <3

- Semper
Semper, Semper, Semper been a while. I have been through alot this past few days and it's been taking a toll on my body. There was a blizzard this past weekend that I got stuck in so I didn't end up seeing my dad, but like my boss told me even I make mistakes and if I don't deal with it I will regret it.

Also anyone wondering about why my dad was in prison can read this.

DJ i would say you need to go see your father no matter what he did or didn't do he is your father without him you wouldn't be here and i believe it would help you in the long run that way 20-30 years down the road you won't feel regret for not seeing him for maybe the last time now i normally don't bring this up but i lost my friend,my first crush & apart of myself when she "Ally" 1 year ago passed away & i didn't go to funeral due to just being stupid and not believing it was true and now 1 year later i sometimes just start crying due to regret of not seeing her one last time if i could go back and go i would so please please man go see your dad life is short people fuck up and you just gotta forget all about that and just go trust me it may not affect you now but in the long run it may. *Hugs SanctumX*
Thanks.

Yea djweasel, try to make it happen and visit your father. Regret is the one thing in life u don't want to have :/. I really regret something in my personal life and it's something that won't just go away unfortunatly. You can deal with sadness/emotions but regret, that's something different(at least it is for me).
Its hard just trying to figure out what to do.
 
Not sure if srs or just newfag...
Well, is there even a reason not to see him? I mean even if seeing him isn't great you will have the tension released and no regrets even if you don't like what you see.
 
I am gonna tell you all right now I have been taking steps toward things. I talked to my nigga from work Cory who's 35 and has a family. He agrees even though he made mistakes he gave me life. Basically we spoke about how it would benefit me along with others. He put it this way, We could go to prison for drugs or a dui and we would wanna see our family.

I spoke to my dads case worker, and she is going to send me visitation papers.
 
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I am gonna tell you all right now I have been taking steps toward things. I talked to my nigga from work Cory who's 35 and has a family. He agrees even though he made mistakes he gave me life. Basically we spoke about how it would benefit me along with others. He put it this way, We could go to prison for drugs or a dui and we would wanna see our family.

I spoke to my dads case worker, and she is going to send me visitation papers.
Great to hear you made the right decision (IMO)! Good luck with the visit & be strong as it will surely be an emotional moment
 
Go see him as much as you can. Trust me, you hate him now but once he's gone, the fact that he was the one who created you won't change and you will be kicking yourself in the head for the rest of your life for not saying good bye to him at least. Trust me.
 
Good choice by having the guts to visit your dad, he is STILL your dad, all people make mistakes once in their lives, And you should see him while he is still here, i'm sure he doesn't like not seeing his family because of this, Tell us what has happened tomorrow after you know whether you can and when you can visit your dad.
 
You, angry? Preposterous! And hell man, if your dad wants you to go see him, might as well, and see how it goes. I want to see my dad, but he hasn't written me a letter back saying that I can, and that was over a month ago. So count your blessings man, especially if he's getting ready to croak.
 
My first thought was to suggest that you get in contact iwth him as soon as possible, he may be living his last days and you're his son.

However, the obvious emotional trauma that you went through after his incarceration must be taken into consideration; you don't want to go and see him and then following that have to see psychiatrists again.


Good luck with whatever you choose
 
I think you really should go and see him, because really you only get one Dad, no matter what he's done, you should see him just incase something does happen.

All the best brother, chin up.
 
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