I don't know what to do...

[Bwk]

My mom is an alcoholic.

I've finally told someone. It's been going on as far back as I can remember, and I've slowly come to realization at how much she is dependent on alcohol. She can't hardly go a day without it. It kills me. I'm slowly becoming depressed, and my grades have been going down and down. i have no idea what to do to get her to stop. My father is the best dad in the world, he is still with her even after 15 years of her constant bitching. She yells at him whenever she is drunk for a new pool, or fast food, or other things she doesn't even need. It hurts so much to see her yell at my strong dad. Nothing gets him down but when shes drunk. I've never seen him cry about anything, not even when his dad died. My dad and I have tried talking to her for the past year now, But all she does is bitch us back and will not answer our questions of why she drinks. She has gone to AA and was clean for 4 months when her parents talked her into it. But she went back to drinking. My grandparents have no idea what to do, my dad doesn't, I don't, she even talked to our pastor.

As I write this my dad is out of town on a business trip. My mom is drunk. My little brother is sitting on the Xbox crying. I just walked into her room and found 3 full bottles of vodka. Of course she denies that they are hers. The worst part is watching my brother cry.


Please someone help me. I have no idea what to do and have even had dark thoughts, I'm at a loss..

 

[Zerkerfist]

Your family may need to host an intervention if your mother is unwilling to quit on her own.

When an addict refuses to quit, and the people in their lives enable them to continue living the way they do without consequences, life becomes a living hell for everyone around that person. I'm sure your Dad loves your Mom and doesn't want anything bad to happen to her, but by allowing her to continue to live in the house and drink in front of his children (you and your little brother), what he is doing is enabling her to continue acting the way she does. Your mother knows it hurts all of you, and herself, but she is beyond the point of being able to save herself. She is an addict, and the alcohol will always come first as long as she is allowed to continue drinking.

You need to speak to your Dad. Rally up your whole family - Dad, you & your brother, your Grandparents and host an intervention. Sit down with your mom and confront her about her addiction and how much it hurts you all. You can take turns talking about how it affects each of your lives negatively, or do it however you'd like. But the point is, she needs to be confronted once and for all and given an ultimatum - either choose sobriety and to be a part of your family, or she can choose to continue to drink, in which case she will be kicked out of your house and you guys will all have to turn your backs on her. It sounds harsh, but sometimes it is the ONLY thing that works.

Even if you kick her out, but your Dad just puts her up in a hotel and pays her monthly rent and all those things, he is still enabling her. She needs to be backed into a corner, completely helpless and alone where she has absolutely no choice but to go into treatment. Then get her into a rehabilitation center for a couple months until she has been clean for a small period of time and ready to come home. She will always be an addict and so your family will be fighting this battle for the rest of your lives. If you guys all work together though, it can be done, and you can all live together happily again like you used to.

I wish you the best of luck man. PM me if you need more information and/or help.