I have to get this off my chest.

Hello everyone. I've posted here before but I've forgotten it.

Here's my issue,,,

I do not care like everyone else. What do I mean by this you ask? Here it goes... Let's say I own a furnace business.. I sell 200k units and my profits are 25M. Latter on I find out that there are flows with it.. I do not care and I continue to sell. Soon enough x amount of customers homes burn down some resulting in injuries or death. The end of sales is 50M. I pay out 10M in damages. What's the problem with this? I do not care that people were hurt. I made my 30M and I'm out. I paid the lawyers, victim fees, etc.

Personally I have no feelings in the matter.

Secondly I feel the same about relationships. Yesterday I got into a new relationship after being single for one year. I am 23, he is 22. The only reason I got into the relationship is because I see it as a way to benefit me. To get me to a place I want to be. I see it as good strategy. I will not hurt him in the process and when I'm done with him I will let him down softly.

Most if not all of my success in life been because of the way I think. When I see a person rather it is my parents or a stranger I see them as tools to help me grow but I will never knowingly hurt them. Most times I will use them to better themselves to help me.

I typed this pretty fast because I am in a rush but I will check back later.

I guess this is my cry for help haha but at the same time I have doubt that it matters.

 

Realtionships are supposed to be beneficial to both people, I dont see a huge issue if both of you are benefiting from the realtionship.

The work portion of it has to be in moderation though, Successful business comes from smart business.

 

If you are looking at things in a business perspective, it would be smarter to fix the flaws as it'll 1) keep your customers coming longer 2) less stress from legal troubles which will only allow for the business to run longer. This will make you more money in the long run. If there were flaws in your product and it caused injuries, you'll lose a lot in lawsuits than you would make in sales while turning a blind eye on the flaws. The number of people getting hurt and filing a lawsuit will outweigh your profits 100%.

Besides that, I think your issue is that you use people to advance. I won't say there is anything wrong with that. A relationship should be give and take anyways. A lot of people do that but it seems you don't love your parents or those whom you know but use them solely to advance. This shows a lack of love for those people.

Try to practice empathy and see how you would feel when being taken advantage of. I don't know what else to suggest -- to be honest, there isn't much else.

 

First of all if you make a defective product and it kills people you're losing all the money you earned + your company and probably your equity. People don't profit when their product kills people.

 

Looking out for yourself in relationships and business isn't wrong, in fact, its good at least you are doing things on your own.

However, if it comes at a cost of manipulating others, being deceitful, and ruining lives (using people and injuries included) isn't right and will only go so far.

You don't have to care about people, but you should abide by honesty, integrity, and common sense if you want to go far, like dreams achieved far.

 

Onto your furnace business, 'you don't care' problem.

The first, I doubt any business would be that profitable. Although I know it is an example, the profits you make are unlikely to re compensate the damages suffered by the victims. The underlying problem however is the 'you don't care' attitude.

I think it's actually you don't care about other people, since presumably you care about yourself, so clearly you care about something, yourself. With that in mind, it is actually in your self-interest to care, or pretend to care about those around you. I'm not going to write an essay justifying this, but suffice to say if you treat other people good, they will reciprocate. If you treat other people bad, they will reciprocate. If you don't believe me, continuing living your life by stepping on other peoples shoes (literally), pushing the elderly out of the way if they block your path, and so on. It is unlikely you do any of those things because you know that the negative consequences will outweigh the positive consequences. Thus, your care for other people can at least manifest from the desire to better yourself. Recognize that one of the better ways to better yourself is to care about, or at least pretend to care about other people in a variety of situations.

As for the relationship issue, if the guy cannot detect that your entire relationship is artificial, then he is partially responsible. That being said, you must have incredible control over your emotions and body language to be able to pull something off like that; be in a relationship with someone that you have absolutely no feelings for.


Ultimately you can choose the way you want to live your life. However, actions are objective and consequences are objective. If you believe that your actions are the best pathway to enable you to live a good life, by all means follow them. However, that does not mean that they are the best way. If you believe that praying will cure cancer forever, and opt out of all empirically based medicines to treat cancer, the consequences will follow whatever your opinion. Be sure about whether your pathway is in your best interests, because if you're wrong it is you that will pay the price, and that applies to everyone, not just you.

 

But the problem with me is that I don't think the other side is benefiting as much as he is.

Why go into a relationship just to use the other person and 'let them down softly' later on? That is a parasitic relationship in my opinion. Relationships should be about mutual affection on both sides, not just on one side while the other leeches off their partner. Maybe OP needs to find someone who is in the same situation, with the same vision and ideals? That could be mutually beneficial but in the end, why even bother getting into that relationship in the first place if you know it's going to be broken up later down the road?

And about the business, why wouldn't you actively seek the problem with the furnaces and fix it? Would it not save you money in the long run? Fix the problem > having to shell out millions upon millions in settlements, court fees, lawyer fees, the hassle of having to deal with all that.

I know you said you don't care, but you won't be successful if you keep it up. You said yourself that you 'want to be successful' but you always feel like you 'don't care'. That's a poor attitude which will lead to your downfall in the later years. You seem for short-sighted and don't seem like you're thinking of growth in the future, but rather a 'do this now so I can make this much now' mentality.

 

I think what you're trying to express is that you have certain sociopath tendencies/thought processes and it's very nature in contrast to what you see around you is disturbing.

Everyone has sociopath tendencies. Some people are full blown sociopaths. It's a mental state and it doesn't mean you're going to start chopping people up and putting them in plastic bags. You can still care for things, though obviously not the people who died in the fire from your furnace business.

But seriously, many sociopaths still have morals, integrity and characteristics that define them way more than the fact that they're a sociopath ever could.

 

So you care about yourself more than others? Welcome to humanity!

 

I really don't like the idea of exploiting people for your own benefit. That being said, its good that u want to kind of confront your problem im guessing? and that u don't hurt the people in the process. However my advice is that you should stop cuz success and monetary gains can only get you so far in life. Somewhere down the road you will realise that its the intangible things that matter such as friendships and relationships. Gl with everything man