Unhappy at university

Hey guys. I don't know if I'm really asking for advice here, I might be, but I think I want to know more if others feel the same I do or if this is normal.

I'm extremely stressed because of school. I don't sleep well and I feel my extroverted personality slowly crawling back into a shell I had in middle school.

I have already flip-flopped my majors - I went from Game Development, to Environmental Sustainability, and am now in Computer Science. The math is killing me. The programming isn't too hard but will get much, much harder.

As it stands all I do all the time is basically homework. I am only taking 3 courses this semester, too. Next semester I take 4 and there will be less time to catch up on my much needed sleep, since I get little as it is.

I like to program, but I didn't know I would be so unhappy with with my schooling. I was much happier last year doing my Bachelor of Arts in Sustainability, but I don't think that could get me a job. Computer Science would. My complaint last year in my BA was that I was not using my brain enough, and this year my complaint is I'm using it way too much.

Is this a normal feeling? Everyday I want to go back to my easy BA and be happy, and everyday people tell me to try harder. I am trying my hardest right now.

I'm not doing poorly in school, I'm more or less doing average. With the amount of effort I put into my classes though you would think I would be doing better.

Right now I'm getting roughly a 67% in Calculus, 90% in Computer Science I, and 65% or so in Physics.

 

As long as you know you're trying your hardest and passing, that's all that matter's, rite?

 

Unfortunately you're experiencing what most university students experience but to a higher extent. I was sort of in the same situation in the semester I just finished. I switched from a finance degree to a finance/law double degree. The work load was at least two fold and the course was completely different in nature. Anyway, I found that befriending people helped enormously as collaborating helped me utilise other people to finish assignments quicker, etc. You'll also find that you start to enjoy class more, even if the content is dull, when you have a few buddies. Try and stay with it as it's only a few years and qualifications are pretty much 'mandatory' in any decent job :[.

 

There's two flip sides of the situation that can be argued, and I suppose only you will know which is yours.

• You have one life. Who knows how long it will be. Don't spend your life being miserable, rather, do what you love and love what you do. As long as you're determined and hard working, you'll never do to badly no matter what course you take in life. There's more to life than material, and a well-paid job. There's experiences to be had, places to visit and ultimately: life is too short to be weighed down by what we're expected to do and pressured to be.

on the other hand there's,

• A sacrifice of the years at Uni, being stressed; unhappy; tired out, will all be worth it in the end when you're fully qualified in computer science and have the world as your oyster with employer's desperate for people like you. It's definitely worth considering just buckling down and studying, studying, studying to have a future of infinite choices and opportunities. No worrying about money, or a job, or supporting a family.. security.

Those are the two options really. And honestly I kind of feel the same as you do some days. Some days I just can't be bothered getting out of bed to go through it all again, I put off studying and end up staying up 48 hours straight just to scrape by exams... but outside of university a job is a varied environment and I'm sure you'll enjoy it much more than Uni. I guess just be head-strong and don't make a decision that you'll regret in 10/20/30 years time.

 

I think you're right, I think I value the second option more. I agree with the first, but I'm the type of person who would want a family one day so security would be a definite plus. It's just hard when you get stuck on something in a course that will be on your exam, and you have no idea how to do it - then you spend hours and hours on it and you get nowhere. Then you think back to easier times and how simple everything was and how much happier you were.

I was able to have a girlfriend last year, I was able to play games as they were released, and I wasn't stressing too much about school. I still had a lot of work, deadlines, etc, just in the form of reports and essays as opposed to code projects and math questions. This year I have no time for anything. I've managed to allot myself a Saturday night every now and then to spend with friends just to maintain my friendships, but next semester I might not even have time for that.

It's difficult thinking of the bigger picture, is what I think I'm trying to say. Right now I'd much rather go for your first option and enjoy my early 20s instead of living day-to-day in front of a screen or a textbook, but in a few years when I'm on my own and have to support myself I may want to have a solid salary at my back as opposed to relying on odd jobs that will get me nowhere.

 

I'm pretty sure the same dilemma screws with every student's head. But honestly, my personal preference is to just knuckle down, get it all done and enjoy the rest of my life. There's no way I could deal with the stress of being poor, unemployed, not being able to provide for my family, not being able to buy myself nice things now and then, getting in to debt, homelessness even.. those all provide one with way more stress than uni will.

Like you say, focus on the bigger picture. It's extremely tough, but you will be rewarded tenfold and feel excellent to have done it. Stick it out bro.

 

Roary summed it up pretty nicely, but why wouldn't there be any job opportunities as an Environmental Sustainability major? Is it just there's no opportunities, or there's more / better opportunities in Computer Science?

If there are opportunities, but you just make less, i'd go for the BA if that's what you enjoy. If you enjoy programming (which i'm assuming you do), then stick it out for the next few years as in the long run, it'll be worth it. Hope all goes well.

 

I think I just needed rest to think with a clear head. It's really hard to weigh the pros and cons when you've been up for 24 hours and are stuck on a seemingly simple calculus homework problem

I totally agree with you and really appreciate you being able to put that into words. It'll be a tough few years ahead, but I've got a good support frame of friends. Knowing that I'll never really have a tough time finding a job is a huge relief as well, especially when I see people as stressed as I am doing things like East Asian Studies and Philosophy lol.

The thing about the environmental degree I was taking was that it wasn't exactly something that taught you a skill. Everything we were learning was really just theory, so there'd be no way for me to work as a researcher or someone in the field. I could maybe work on policies but there's no work in that, plus it's dull as fuck.

Computer science/software engineering/IT fields are HUGE right now. With my degree I could do anything involving a computer, from engineering to management. I could even be an accountant with the amount of math I have to do. There's just a bigger realm of possibilities with this, so as Roary mentioned I just have to hunker down and get through it so I can enjoy life without worrying about poverty or the next paycheck

 

This might be a little late but if you prefer the practical programming look into a Software Engineering course. Talk anytime on Skype dude.

 

I think the problem would be something common that many people might face or have already faced in their life. That is the choice between passion vs something that is more stable. A lot of times what u enjoy doing might be risky as chances of it securing you a stable life is not high while doing something more stable such as in this case computer science has a higher chance of getting you jobs and stuff. To me, its really hard in these situations but I would go with my passion if I was in your position. Nowadays, you can always go for other courses later in life if your first choice didn't work out. Don't be discouraged mate, I wish you all the best in finding the right path and I hope it all works out well for you Catch up on sleep as well and don't let it affect your health as that is very important

 

"I was much happier last year doing my Bachelor of Arts in Sustainability, but I don't think that could get me a job."

I said this to somebody else, unfortunately now a days money is the be all and end all.. when you are going to die, you will think of all the good memories, you dont want to think I had a shit life, i hated my job.. coming home depressed every day because of work.. do what you enjoy..

 

Hey man, I am sorry that you're feeling that way. But let me tell you that its normal and almost every university student experiments it.

I am currently in my third year studying to be a software engineer, it has a lot of math and logic subjects and its important to note that in school I used to do bad at math, now I dont. I study around 4 to 7 hours a day, sometimes I ask myself if I am doing the right thing, like is this really worth it? It happened a lot of times that I invested a big amount of hours into study and failed the exam.
The key is how far can you go after failing and failing, you never have to give up because if thats what you really want you will eventually give the best of you to achieve it

Just keep going... if what you are studying is what you would like to work for, however if its not, I would suggest you to not waste time flip-flopping majors because when you notice you're already old (old enough for the working market - young persons are always on demand, due to their fresh ideas and new concepts). I currently work at IBM in the IT section and I can strongly affirm that programming will not only get you a job, but a very high in-come.

 

I think it's normal for a university student to feel like that. Most of my friends feels like that too. Some of them have too much free time and rarely comes in class, and others have a dream, a life, and they focus on building it. I would say that it's a good thing you're into your career so much, but be sure to not pressurize yourself. Your body needs proper care too, so be sure to sleep fully ( even if you have a lot of home works ). Eat properly and do everything else properly. Leave some time to socialize people also, don't put them out completely. You won't go on for long without friends. Laugh and be happy, you just somehow need to balance them both on a scale.

 

Do you have any choice over which topics you study? If you have a lot of choice in future semesters then things can get better, as you can focus on areas you're interested in and maybe don't find so challenging.

 

I'm taking IT Managment at Universidade do Minho in Portugal at the moment, it envolves Creating, developing adapting managing and everything related with software and sometimes even hardware. My studies are very similar to yours.

Im assuming you refer courses as in classes? I have 5 each semester. In a year I must complete 5 out of 10 to get to the next year, where I'll need to complete another 5 and the 5 on the year before that I didn't complete.

I'm good at what the teachers request, not the best at the crappy shit like economics and all that useless crap, but I'm pretty good at programming and team managment (average 18 out of 20 on grades), and I feel the exact same way as you.

In middle school as you call it, I was a lazy motherfucker, used to do pretty much nothing and sit on my ass playing games, while still getting good grades. When I reached Uni it all hit me in the face, I was no longer available to just sit on my ass, not study and get good grades. This made me wake up during the first year, making me study and commit real hard to uni and everything involved.

This decision made me complete 9 out of the 10 classes I had, with an average of 14 out of 20 (the crappy shit pull me down ). Anyway, this was the first year.

Im now on the second year, first semester is pretty much over and I feel like shit. I got awesome grades this semester but I have to work so much even during vacations, but when I actually try to start something I just end up playing league or smth, sadly. I can't find the strength to actually start working unless I group up with a couple of friends.

I guess what Im saying is, Uni is diferent, and it requires a lot of effort that previously wasn't needed. If you really want to excell in your education try to find friends who want to, and push together through it!

 

I've been looking into how I can support myself through the stress of the degree, and it's really all boiled down to "living in the present". I'm always extremely worried about the future, how I'll manage a huge load of work or how I'll do on an exam. I have to start training myself to think in the present and live in the present. It'll alleviate a lot of the stress. The tricky part is doing just that - it's not easy forgetting about what the future might hold.

 

Just finish a subject and start investing in property,etc. Start your own business. Read some of the following books: Think and Grow Rich - Napolean Hill, Rich Dad Poor Dad - Robert Kiyosaki, The Richest Man in Babylon, etc. Just my advice for you. Getting a job is not the only option.

 

This is exactly how I feel sometimes. Define priorities. It's not bad if you consider something you like more important and do that first. In fact, thats exactly what you should do to keep you motivated. Don't forget there will ever be a time where you only do what you like/want and that there's always shit that we must do no matter what. So gain confidence and motivation, and go through it. When you manage to complete these tasks you'll feel better because you managed to do something you didn't like/want and you can now do other stuff that you actually like.