Whats the funny joke you have ever heard`

lol spereff that one is mine! lol. either way here goes one i heard a while ago on this forum:

A hubby is going on a one month buissnes trip and he doesn't want his wife cheating on him while he is away so he decides to get her a toy. He stops by the adult store and starts looking for a suitable dildo for his wife but they all looked the same old thing. The hubby goes to the counter and asks if they have any different dildos and the guy at the counter says "Well there is one thing...". He pulls out a wooden box and inside it is a dildo. It looks like any normal one except when the counter-guy says: "Magic dildo fuck the keyhole" it fliyed to the door and started fucking the keyhole. The hubby decided to buy it and the guy at the counter explains:

"When you want it to start fucking just tell your wife to open the box and say "Magic Dildo fuck my pussy"".

So the hubby goes home and gives the dildo to his wife and takes off to his trip. A few days later the wife gets bored and says "Magic Dildo fuck my pussy" so it flew and started to fuck her. After the woman had gotten her orgasm she realized the hubby never told her how to stop it. She tried saying "Magic dildo stop" and so on but nothing worked. The woman quickly hoped in her car and started driving to the hospital but the dildo was still fucking her. The constant orgasms made her push the gas peddal too much so she got pulled over for speeding. The police officers comes to the car and says:

"Miss you know how fast you were going? Why are you driving so out of control"

the woman says: "It's this magic dildo my hubby gave me, it fucks me on its own but i don't know how to stop it."

The police officer says: "Ya right, magic dildo my ass!"



Figure the rest out on your own guys and gals.

 

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I just made this one up... but I find it to be funny...

So there's this young boy and he's in class at school.
The teacher asks the class "Does anybody know who invented the telephone?"
The class is silent.
Then the teacher calls the boy up to the front of the classroom.
"Do you have anything to say on the matter?" the teacher asks the boy in front of the class.
The boy replies, "If I did, I would've raised my hand after previous question."
The teacher then sent him to the vice principal's office, saying "With a smart mouth like that, you ought to play a black woman with an attitude in a sitcom."
The class laughs as he walks out, hanging him head in shame and anger.
But instead of doing what he's told, and going to the vice principal's office, he leaves the school to walk to the park.
On his way to the park he encounters a man. The man ties him to a tree and rapes him to death. The end.

I'm a natural comedian methinks.

 

fuckin sweet! i think that it wouldve been a bit better if instead of a dude raping him, it was a fat black lady with an attitude.

 

^^ surprisingly i lol'ed at that cruel.

 

Cruel I didn't like urs lol. But Id have to agree with jack it would of been better if the guy was a angry black lady with a attitude.

 

Well... it wouldn't be rape in that case.
Because no one can resist a fat black chick with an attitude.

 

LMao that was funny. No1 can resist a fat black chick with a attitude lol...

 

LMAO. Nice one Cruel. rofl.

 

Funniest joke
When the white dude die he lefts a mouse and a flat or house to his childrn.
But when black dude dies he lefts unpaid bills to his childrn.