Problems with my EX

Ok so me and my girlfriend dated for about 4 months then we broke up and then we were apart from eachother and didnt talk for 2 months. Then we started talking again and i was thinking about getting back with her but we still had some issues we had to work out. But then one day she started dating another guy who i dont like at all. But she says she still loves me and wants to be with me but she doesnt want to break up with her current boyfriend, and she says she thinks that her and her boyfriend will break up soon and i should just wait for her. So we still txt eachother everyday and when we talk on the phone she talks about her boyfriend and tells me about something funny he did, and this makes me feel terrible. I feel like i will never get her back and i feel like im her "back up plan" incase her and her current boyfriend dont work out. And i cant stop feeling depressed and this is all i think about. i think it might have to due with the fact that she was my first girlfriend and my only girlfriend. and when we dated the first time i didnt even like her that much but now that shes with someone else i feel terrible and depressed like 24/7. any advise or helpful tips? and i cant try and get a new girlfriend because i got to a really small school and most of the girls hate me cause my reputation got ruined due to my Ex's sister.

 

Give her a time frame and tell her to make up her mind. If she wants you then gl with it man, if she doesn't then at least you know you tried and can move on.

 

yeah i tried that but she gives me the run around, i told her she has to pick between me and him but she keeps telling me shes "still thinking" or she "doesnt want to hurt anyone" and moving on is really hard cause shes like the only girl that actually liked me and got to know me.

 

Sounds like something that happened to a friend of mine. Best thing you can do is just say bye and don't look back. She has got you tied down and is just playing with you and stringing you along. Stop and think if you love someone, would you date someone else? NO! So how can you think she loves you? If she does then she wouldn't be dating someone else and she wouldn't have to "think." Its a bad situation and she is just using you. Its tough and I have helped my friend with the same thing. It's not easy, but it is much better in the long run.

There are more fish in the sea!

 

In all honesty, you need to cut all ties with this girl. It is for your own good, so that you can heal and grow and gain back your confidence to be with somebody else.

You deserve a great relationship just as much as she does, and what she is doing to you right now is totally cruel and slimy. She really IS keeping you as her backup plan right now, and I think that is the only reason she is still communicating with you. Not only does this make you feel like shit, but imagine how her boyfriend would feel if he found out that she was staying close with her ex (you) and telling him to stick around because things may not work out with her new bf. She is playing both of you.

 

No offense man, but I stopped reading after you said she asked you to "Wait for her". Don't EVER let anyone pull your strings. Cut your ties, look elsewhere, trust me; if you don't, you will regret it.

She's putting you on rebound, sorry bro.

 

Been in this situation myself, And i'm going to give you the same advice the other guys gave above. Get her out of your life period.. Delete her number, Facebook, everything that reminds you of her.

Yeah it's hard to move on, but it's alot better in the long run, Will be hard for the first couple of week's / Month's but once you are over her you will feel great again.

As the saying goes, "There is plenty of fish in the Sea" & it stays true too it's meaning, She is NOT going to be the only girl to find you interesting & take the time to know you

TL;DR, Delete her from your life.. Best of luck champion, Feel free to PM me if you want some advice

 

^This exactly.
Trust me bro, I'm in the same situation as you, dealing with ex's that can't make up their mind, but claim to be "in love" with you still.
Just as much as she deserves to be happy, so do you, cut ties with her, and pick up a new girl.

P.S - Once you get a new girl and your ex find's out, she'll flip out and definitely want you back even more, even then, it'll still wont be worth it, just move on, if anything come back to her latter.

 

Ive been in the same siutation as you.
You need to understand that she is not in love with you. If she were she wouldn't be with another guy. If you ask her decide and she respond by ' still thinking' you need to just let it go. do as the other guys said, delete her from your life. It's hard but worth it :/

 

She's just playing you around,

If she did honestly love you then she would leave that guy no matter what,

You need to forget about her.. its not worth it..

 

If you're not the first person to come to her head with something like this.. Then then what you should do is obvious.

 

Get rid of her. As hard as it is 2 say it the girl just doesnt like you anymore its best to move on

 

you should let her go, if she really loved you, she'd just leave his friend, don't be a guy for emergency

 

Dont sit around and wait for her for forever. If she truly loves and cares about you, she'll realize that she's with the wrong person and take you back.. You dont need to be her back up plan.

 

It's a complicated situation, and most of the advice handed to you is probably from people who haven't been in your particular scenario. Unfortunately, I've been in your shoes twice before (Girlfriend of 2.5 years, and Girlfriend of 1 year).

Girls are complicated beings, and most are desperate in their search for "happiness" and the "perfect guy". Don't get too mad with her, you and her both are looking for the same thing; love. However, bear in mind that your life doesn't revolve around this girl. Keep your head on straight, don't let it get to you, and focus on what's truly important; school, family, work, etc.

Remember, success is the best revenge, and to quote Ryan Gosling, "she's gonna rue [regret] the day she ever decided to give up on you." Get your swagger back, and "distance" yourself from her, for now at least. If you do it right, she'll "wake up" before too long and come running back into your arms; both of the girls that did this to me did. The first of which I turned down because I could no longer trust her, and the romance we once shared fizzled out, but boy was that some much needed closure. The second girl on the other hand, is still a to be continued story...

 

I agree with everyone else, you should try to forget about her. She isn't worth your time, especially because you didn't even like her that much in the first place. In those four months you have gotten used to her and you probably can't imagine life without her at this moment, but that will change if you convince yourself that you don't need her.

 

You can't let yourself not do anything about her. You have to respect yourself, and tell her that you wont be her second choice. Tell her how you feel about her, and if she wants to be with you then she needs to end everything with her current boyfriend. The current situation is not fair to you.

 

Wow this almost sounds exactly like the predicament that I'm in. Besides the fact that my relationship was 2.5 years and I have a kid with her. You just really have to think about how you feel in a situation like this. Its not gonna be easy getting over her. Everyone can say cut your losses and find somebody else but its easier said then done. I have 2 tips that could really help you out in this situation.
1. Always keep yourself busy. It will keep her off your mind and help you kinda relax and maybe put a smile on your face.
2. If she says she Loves you and wants to be with you but she doesnt want to hurt the other guy.. Thats bullshit. Shes pretty much trying to cover up her feelings for you by filling it with somebody else.. Just say the reason I havent got with anyone else is because I know that I want to be with you. I know that I could never be with somebody else when I know that I have such strong feelings for you.. Just let her know that she still has those feelings for you but just doesnt want to show them as much because shes with another guy, and that shes practically trying to cover up her true feelings.
If she keeps denying this thats when you know you've done everything and it's time to really move on.
It's been 7 months for me and my Ex and I still love her to this day and would drop any girl to be with her. But like I said it's really all about how you feel and really look at you and her being together for 2 or 3 years and think about if thats really what you want.
This is my first post in this section so please dont criticize me to hard =P.
I tried my best.

 

This is from personal experience.

I've encountered a very similar situation. Basically, what makes you want her so bad is cause you can't have her. Most effective thing you can do, live on with your life, be successful, get your ass to the gym, get insanely ripped.

Next time she sees you, she be like "wow". You just got to show her you're the better man who is NOT needy. From there you WILL have the moral high ground between the two of you and you will feel MUCH better.

This happened to me. True Story.
Bitches be crazy.