I am coming for YOU (threat letter)

Just you wait.

 

For a small fee I can protect you

 

That's a nice looking medium well steak there

 

do you ever just think it would be great to be one of those middle class dads? you know the one i'm talking about, the ones who have barbecues in their garden all the time who live in the suburbs. you'll have a beautiful wife, a few kids and a golden retriever, maybe even a cat or something. your wife would be getting railed by like 4 black guys but it wouldn't matter because you'd be completely oblivious. you'd look forward so much to those barbecues, cooking a steak to fucking perfection and getting compliments from all the bois on your cooking skills. you'd probably flirt a bit with your friend's wife as well, but you know it's just some mischievous fooling around. it wouldn't get anywhere serious. you'd wear your cooking apron that has a sorta risqué but its all in good humour joke on it like this one:
https://img1.etsystatic.com/004/0/6882193/il_340x270.390855039_fn96.jpg
and that would be the biggest thing on your mind. wouldn't that be great?

 

that's an oddly specific dream. want to act it out?

 

Nah