Strong Soldier... (Poem)

Discussion in 'Music' started by Gas Guy, Dec 13, 2010.

Strong Soldier... (Poem)
  1. Unread #1 - Dec 13, 2010 at 7:56 PM
  2. Gas Guy
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    Strong Soldier... (Poem)

    I’m here by myself,
    lost and alone,
    not sure about my health,
    while your waiting for me at home.

    While miles away,
    wondering about you,
    I’m screaming mayday!,
    hoping I’ll be one of the lucky few.

    To make it back,
    to our home; safe,
    my world is turning black,
    for I was hit by the strafe.

    A couple days later,
    when I was found,
    fighting for my life in that crater,
    my head left on that battleground.

    Now experiencing PTSD,
    no one ever comes to visit,
    they say “oh just let him be”,
    that’s not even apposite.

    Please rate on a 1 to 10 scale; 10 being the best, and critique it you want.
     
  3. Unread #2 - Dec 13, 2010 at 8:38 PM
  4. uselesspoop
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    Strong Soldier... (Poem)

    eight for me. im not an expert so i can't give any critique
     
  5. Unread #3 - Dec 16, 2010 at 4:40 PM
  6. Gas Guy
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    Strong Soldier... (Poem)

    Thanks for the feed back... I'm currently working on another one.
     
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