New school, Extreamly shy, need help!

[infested123]

Hey, its pretty much like the title says...
i just moved to this new school and of course im a bit shy...
but i'v been here a few weeks now... I still dont know what i could talk to people about.
Im not completly a loner, i'v been told im moving toward the "Prep" side i guess?
These guys invited me to sit with them during lunch, they just talk about funny things that have already happened with them so i just kinda sit there... I just really dont know what to do...

ANY HELP WOULD BE APPRECIATED

 

[Herman Li]

Be the first one to talk about the Superbowl on Monday.

 

[infested123]

lol im pretty sure their having a superbowl party .. well the group im talking to are

 

[Sypherz]

When I moved from Canada to America freshman year, I went through the exact same thing. I went through too many friend groups-- from stoners to preps to drama kids to overachievers to.. who knows. And along the way I made some of the best friends in my life. You just have to be as friendly as possible. Have something interesting about yourself. Talk to everyone you can.. and trust me, things will work out.

 

[infested123]

When I moved from Canada to America freshman year, I went through the exact same thing. I went through too many friend groups-- from stoners to preps to drama kids to overachievers to.. who knows. And along the way I made some of the best friends in my life. You just have to be as friendly as possible. Have something interesting about yourself. Talk to everyone you can.. and trust me, things will work out.

What part of america did you live in?
im in Ohio, and people are so "groupy" if you know what i mean.. idk if i can just talk to everyone i can, it could easily backfire

 

[Herman Li]

Meh it's high school I'm assuming? Groups don't mean shit. Try and be out-going with everyone you come in contact with so EVERYONE loves you. Eventually, the group will come to you.

 

[Seira]

Hey there infested123, this is a very common problem in teenagers. I've experienced it myself 1 year ago . Well honestly, there are a lot of things you can do to fit in a group. You can start playing the school sports, it's a good way to meet new people and by the sport you play, you will have already one thing to talk about. Or for example, another common topic, that involves mostly every student is for example, asking school things like: "Hey, did anyone beside me noticed how bitchy that teacher is?" I am sure that others will agree, just to insult the teachers lol. Beside those, there are lot of things! If they talk about something, just laugh and if you can, try asking them a question related to what they are telling, for example, he talks about the camp they went on 4th grade, so you can ask like: Oh that sounds cool man, did you meet any girls there?

I hope this helps you!

 

[FoxTek]

The thing is, you can't just go into a group because they feel bad for you, unfortunately schools have groups within them. What you need to do is sit down and have a think about what you are, like me for example, I was in the group who always read manga and was artistic.

You just need to figure out what your strengths are, then find other people like that and strike up a conversation. Something simple, like.."oh hey, I like your (insert something here)" then throw a compliment and maybe mention you're interested in the same thing. Then introduce yourself and go from there.

Going to new schools is hard and when you don't know where you fit in or know what you like isn't generally accepted, it's even harder. I wish you the best and feel free to ask me questions via pm or posting here. :3

 

[ClazzD]

you should hang out with the stoners cause they're the chillest.
i just came to my new school 6 months ago and i've made friends with some stoners.
the ones at my school are nice and really welcoming.

 

[T R 1 B A L]

you should hang out with the stoners cause they're the chillest.
i just came to my new school 6 months ago and i've made friends with some stoners.
the ones at my school are nice and really welcoming.

This is awful advice.




Literally, as cliche as it sounds, just be yourself!
Next time your friends invite you to their table again, try to forget their new friends, just treat them like you would with your old ones - show appreciation, crack a few jokes and you should be fine.

The biggest turnoff for friendships is either awkwardness or coldness, so just try to appear sincere and genuine.

PM me if you have any other questions, I'd be happy to help.

 

[AlyGoneAly]

Reminds me of when I moved schools from Elem. to Intermediate.

The whole school was completely different! I was the lonely turtle for about two to three weeks until I finally made contact with someone.

If you say you're on the 'prep' side, maybe the shyness will slowly fade away. Remember it takes more than one person to keep a relationship going.

 

[Sypherz]

What part of america did you live in?
im in Ohio, and people are so "groupy" if you know what i mean.. idk if i can just talk to everyone i can, it could easily backfire

Oh, I see. I live in Northwestern Washington. Things are probably much different.

 

[infested123]

Reminds me of when I moved schools from Elem. to Intermediate.

The whole school was completely different! I was the lonely turtle for about two to three weeks until I finally made contact with someone.

If you say you're on the 'prep' side, maybe the shyness will slowly fade away. Remember it takes more than one person to keep a relationship going.

Im not acutally a "Prep" im one of those people that will fit in with anybody.. but iv been to 2 diff schools in ohio and so far the people who are cool with everyone, are usually frowned upon by the more..."popular" people i guess"

I think im doing better though, some guy in my gym class that i was kinda talkin to seemed pretty cool, and he asked for my number... then i asked someone about him and they said "he's one of the coolest preps there is" so idk if thats a good thing or bad lol...
the only thing i have to talk about with this guy is anytime were in gym he tries to grab the basketball rim and he cant... and i usually help him out... im only 5'8 and im grabbing rim but hes kinda short so i just help him with form and such...

 

[Zerkerfist]

When I moved from Canada to America freshman year, I went through the exact same thing. I went through too many friend groups-- from stoners to preps to drama kids to overachievers to.. who knows. And along the way I made some of the best friends in my life. You just have to be as friendly as possible. Have something interesting about yourself. Talk to everyone you can.. and trust me, things will work out.

I think this is really good advice. Basically, you just need to put yourself out there as much as possible. Talk to people that you normally wouldn't, smile at random people in the hallways, be friendly and kind and try hanging out with different sorts of groups to see where you fit in and what sort of things you like.

I'm sure that with a little time and patience, you will meet some great new friends. Most people feel this way when they first move to a new school, but they end up meeting some of the best friends they've ever had a bit further down the line

 

[AlyGoneAly]

Im not acutally a "Prep" im one of those people that will fit in with anybody.. but iv been to 2 diff schools in ohio and so far the people who are cool with everyone, are usually frowned upon by the more..."popular" people i guess"

I think im doing better though, some guy in my gym class that i was kinda talkin to seemed pretty cool, and he asked for my number... then i asked someone about him and they said "he's one of the coolest preps there is" so idk if thats a good thing or bad lol...
the only thing i have to talk about with this guy is anytime were in gym he tries to grab the basketball rim and he cant... and i usually help him out... im only 5'8 and im grabbing rim but hes kinda short so i just help him with form and such...

Well that's a great start! I don't see why the popular people would frown upon those who are well liked. It shouldn't matter what they feel as long as you stay true to yourself.

The more you talk to people, the more opportunities you have to find a 'group' that you will like. When you find that group, they can encourage you to come out of your shyness.

 

[infested123]

lol ok its Tuesday.. and nothings really changed... i will TRY to talk to ppl tomorrow

 

[uselesspoop]

The first step is to not be so concerned over such matters! Your over-concern leads to you build up anxiety (?) and will affect how you behave in school. You say that you are shy, so let's tackle that issue by opening up more and being more confident in yourself. Speak when you wish to but remember to pay attention to the body languages of your peers!

In addition, try to relax as you seem a bit anxious to make new friends in your new school! This will only make the problem worse as you might make friends solely because you want companionship and a sense of security. Right friends will come naturally. There are hundreds of people in your school and i'm sure at least a few will enjoy being in the company of you! So no worries and let nature take its course.

Of course, try to be more friendly and proactive.

ALL THE BEST and be happy

 

[johnny4199]

Try to be yourself man, always work, well nto always, but atleast ull find real friends