Male and Female Showering Habits

Male and Female Showering Habits

Note-: I take no Gratitude for making this, I found it while browsing and thought it was pretty funny so i posted it here for ya'll to look at

Skip to your sex and see how true it is I swear i have a stalker that watchs me in the bathroom it's that close.

Shower like a woman...

Take off clothing and place it in a sectioned laundry hamper according to lights, darks, whites, man made or natural.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If husband seen along the way cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom.

Look at womanly physique in the mirror and stick out belly. Complain and whine about getting fat.

Get in shower. Look for facecloth, armcloth, loin cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash hair once with Cucumber and Lamprey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.Wash hair again with Cucumber and Lamprey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.

Condition hair with cucumber and lamprey conditioner with enhanced natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red raw.

Rinse conditioner off hair taking at least 15 minutes to make sure that it's all come off.

Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.

Scream loudly when husband flushes toilet and water loses pressure and turns red hot.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mould spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of small African country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.

Check entire body for remotest sign of spots. Attack with nails and or tweezers (if you can find them).

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If husband seen, cover up any exposed areas and then rush to bedroom to spend hour and a half getting dressed.


Shower like a man...



Take off clothes while sitting on bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to bathroom. If wife seen, shake knob at her while shouting "Way Hey!!"

Look in mirror and suck in gut to see your manly physique.

Admire size of knob in mirror, scratch bollocks and smell fingers for one last whiff.

Get in shower.

Don't bother to look for wash cloth, don't need one.

Wash face.

Wash armpits.

Laugh at how loud farts sound in the shower.

Wash bollocks and the surrounding area.

Wash arse, leaving hair on soap.

Shampoo hair but do not use conditioner.

Make Mohican hairstyle with shampoo. Pull back curtain to see self in mirror.

Piss in shower.

Rinse off and get out of shower. Fail to notice water on floor because shower curtain outside bath for whole shower time.

Partially dry off.

Look at self in mirror, flex muscles and admire size of knob again.

Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on floor.

Leave bathroom light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, grab knob, go "Yeah baby" and thrust pelvis at her.

Put on yesterday's clothes.

 

Hahahaha
Too true, too true

 

this made me laugh really hard but it seems its more for the older type because i don't have a husband but i can substatute that for a brother -_-.. but things like seperate my clothing and complain that im getting fat i do not do lol

 

Haha I could Imagine you showing some skin to your brother

 

It's obvious he copied this off a site, Nobody here has husbands.

 

He stated that in the first few lines. -.-

 

true very true

 

lol made me laugh but not all that true.......but mostly i guess

 

haha XD!!

 

Different People have different habits, But i think it Pretty much fits most People

 

well what guys here look at there knob before they have a shower (not pissing just in the mirror, personaly i dont.........)

 

lol if its true about the males then thats pretty sick =P

 

Haha wife or not this still fits me.

 

He said that in his thread, you fool.

Well, this was hilarious, but I doubt either of them are perfectly true.

 

lmao irl. worth a chuckle

 

I look at my Knob In tha mirror all the time! .... Oops! ... Wasn't suppose to say that!

 

haha Funny and amusing because its so true.

 

wahahhaha funny and true

 

haha, mostly true I guess.

 

if its the truth why is it funny?
i don't know, but it is lol