Name change Serious Discussion, Please help me.

So i want to start this off that i've had a pretty interesting senior year.
I started this year living with my dad new school and everything and only did half the year in school and the other half online. I spent january up until now literally not doing much, i don't have car yet and i planned on joining the Army but my mother told me that she wants me to go to college etc. etc. I spent alot of time alone and in my head these pass months.


So heres a huge thing, i really wanted to change my name. I never liked it and i finally came up with a good name i like which incorporates a lot of things that i enjoy however today i officially went to court and changed it and i have felt anxious all day. I doubted myself if i was making the right decision and my parents were and are extremely supportive. I even went to the point of wanting to change it back because i was just scared, i have a horrible habit of making things bigger then they ought to be.

Have any of you guys ever changed your name? How long does it take to get used to it? I officially already did it.

I need you guys to help me and make me feel strong again because i feel weak and hopeless. I don't know who i am and what my purpose is. I just turned 18 and i felt almost guilty that i took off my birth name and even contemplated making my name Just my first name and the my middle as last but it sounds very spanish.



Please help me because i am depressed and no trolls please, i don't need that right now.

 

Aw I feel terrible for you!
You shouldn't feel depressed or hopeless especially if your parents where supportive, clearly they also understand the hard times you've been going through and that's what parents are for. I've always wanted to change my last name but my grandma and dad are super proud of our last name and want it to go on for generations so I'm thinking I'll keep it, it's just a last name anyways. (Kinda reminds me of when I was younger I demanded my parents call me princess or I wouldn't listen to them, anyways back on topic)~ Going to college or enrolling in the Army I think will help you a lot, it's a very social place and you're able to meet people just like you and interacting with them and just having fun may help you get over your problems/figure them out.

You're 18 too remember! You're so young you have your whole life to find your "purpose" don't think about it too much or you'll end up in a rut and think your life is worthless like you currently are. I used to do that a lot and I got some help because all I'd do is think too much about my future and think I'm not smart enough to do anything, maybe you could get some help from a counciler if you keep feeling that way.
I hope you're okay in the long run<3

 

Chloecat thank you so much! i was literally refreshing this page to see if i got a response. It feels so good knowing that im not alone and theres other people out there. I appreciate all your kind words.

Did you ever go through "ruts" where you didn't know who you were or you questioned yourself??

 

Of course, I went through one about 6 months ago and I went through a little one a month ago when me and my ex broke up, it shattered me and I lost all hope for myself. I kept telling myself he was the only who believed in me, what's the point in continuing with school, I had our whole future planned out, and I was only doing it for him I've now realized I should be doing it for myself.

Everyone goes through rough patches in their life, some bigger than others but we all find a way to get over them, like talking to a stranger on the internet e.g sythe or getting help in real life.
If you're ever feeling down and need someone online to chat to, you can always pm me cause I know it sucks when you're feeling down and you try to pick yourself up but you just can't, you need that emotional support.

 

If your parents are supportive about it you shouldn't feel bad. Its not like you disowned your last name and got that changed.. its just a first name.

 

i changed my full name, i changed the first and middle and used my previous middle as my current last

 

Chloe, thank you so much for being there for me. I'm glad to know im not the only one and man i be it sucks breaking up with someone you had your life set on spending with. Life gets scary sometimes and i describe these past 3 monthes as "purgatory". I havent moved foward or backward but this name change was something i was so excited for and now that i got it i feel guilty. I love the name i just wish i was born with it rather then changing it to it. I don't want to be a fake person but my original name didn't suit me at all

 

You're still relatively young, and you're still finding out who you are. It's a long process, and not many of us get to a point where we're completely happy with ourselves, what we do, who we associate with, our careers, our lifestyles, etc. and it's the same with you and your personal identity. We all have troubles where we question ourselves and just don't know who we are, but just go with the flow and we all get there at some point.

What you did felt like the right choice at the time, and so it was a brave but probably wise choice. Everyone regrets decisions they make but it's important to remember that at one point you wanted it, and debated it, and argued with yourself about it.. but you chose it. Of course it'll take time to get used to

I wish you luck in the future!