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Poem i wrote when i was 12

Discussion in 'Music' started by Sexy Mario, Nov 20, 2009.

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  1. Sexy Mario

    Sexy Mario Active Member
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    I wrote this poem when my mom died when i was 12.

    Gone Just for Little While

    I'm gone for a little while don't shed any tears
    Im with you in spirit and will be with you for all your years.

    I taught you every thing you need to know
    to get through life it soon will show.

    Just follow the path and live your life right
    You will grow to a person that can love and not fight.

    I'll see you soon so you don't need to cry
    We can hug and kiss and I'll teach you to fly.

    Please do not start this as a debate about Christianity. I am christian and proud of it. If you start a debate it will be reported as spam thank you.
     
    Sexy Mario, Nov 20, 2009
    #1
  2. Fatih

    Fatih ๘̯͡ζWidsom ๘̯͡ζWithin
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Goodjob! Sorry for your loss.
     
    Fatih, Nov 20, 2009
    #2
  3. Lordhooters

    Lordhooters Zombitch
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Very good.
    Touching and relatable.
     
    Lordhooters, Nov 22, 2009
    #3
  4. Icedog726

    Icedog726 Guru

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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Dude that poem was amazing man :(
     
    Icedog726, Nov 22, 2009
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  5. Beat me DoWn

    Beat me DoWn Member

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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    I'm sorry that your mom died. Great Poem though. Very Heartfelt.
     
    Beat me DoWn, Nov 23, 2009
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  6. Omfg1234

    Omfg1234 Forum Addict

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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Nice poem, sorry about your mom dying.
     
    Omfg1234, Nov 23, 2009
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  7. hiway_2_hell

    hiway_2_hell Active Member
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    im very sorry. but i have to say thats a very nice poem
     
    hiway_2_hell, Nov 27, 2009
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  8. Sexy Mario

    Sexy Mario Active Member
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Thanks guys.
     
    Sexy Mario, Nov 27, 2009
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  9. cain121

    cain121 Forum Addict
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Very good i felt your death almost! 10/10
     
    cain121, Dec 17, 2009
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  10. Harker

    Harker Active Member
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    I can feel it...
    This is amazing, true emotion written through words
     
    Harker, Dec 18, 2009
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  11. Mr SJE

    Mr SJE Apprentice
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Very moving poem, i don't understand how this relates to christianity?
    Edit: Don't report me for spam, i just don't understand what the bottom part means?
     
    Mr SJE, Dec 18, 2009
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  12. johnty15

    johnty15 Guru
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    great poem especialy if you wrote it when you where 12 :) and sorry
     
    johnty15, Dec 18, 2009
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  13. sliced

    sliced Apprentice
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Good poem for 12! r.i.p
     
    sliced, Dec 18, 2009
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  14. Arya

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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    It's good for a 12 year old.
    I didn't feel the emotion, though.
     
    Arya, Dec 19, 2009
    #14
  15. ccanax

    ccanax Newcomer

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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    ___________
    U r a real champ....nice rhythm
    ___________
    Contract Hire
     
    ccanax, Feb 2, 2010
    #15
  16. loving_spec

    loving_spec Member
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    nice poem, and sorry =\
     
    loving_spec, Feb 4, 2010
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  17. sabbrinak55

    sabbrinak55 Newcomer

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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Good poem,i am very sorry about your mom dying.

    ___________________
    Lanzarote
     
    sabbrinak55, Mar 4, 2010
    #17
  18. SeaJae

    SeaJae Member
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    Its a good thought, as a person I thought it was great.
    As an experienced writer, I'd say it needs some work. I'm sure you don't care much for an in-depth analysis, since that more than likely wasn't the whole point of the writing piece.
     
    SeaJae, Mar 4, 2010
    #18
  19. AmF

    AmF Member
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    Poem i wrote when i was 12
    You can hug and kiss? This poem is about your mom, so I find that gross.

    Not trying to be rude, and I am sorry for the loss of your mother.
     
    AmF, Mar 4, 2010
    #19
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