Negative thoughts

I can never bring myself to think positively, its making me feel weak and its making me lose confidence, even when I speak about motivation with other people to help them out, i can never bring MYSELF to think positively. Everyday I wake up, i feel like crap and shit. I sleep 8-9 hours and even more sometimes and I still feel like crap.

I can never bring myself to think good about myself. My graphics work might be fine, but when I think to myself, i always think that I'm bad and im not satisfied.

I'm starting to feel obnoxious about myself and that people will think I'm just a completely negative person who puts a positive attitude as just an image, and not an actual thing. Honestly speaking I seem to lose and regain motivation very commonly and often, right now I feel normal, but sooner or later I will lose motivation to do anything and then it gets back. It is a fucking cycle and I can't help it.

I don't know what to do. Don't suggest me counseling or any of that because it would make me look bad infront of my parents + I have my final exams in 2-3 weeks time, i have to do good to get into university for Graphic Designing while dealing with this crap.

 

I know what you mean pal and your not alone! I'm also negative but put on a sorta 2 faced personality. I try to find my positive outlooks on life which are designing. Whenever you wake up and feel like shit. Think about how special you are to be put on earth. Look out ur window and breathe in the air. When you find yourself thinking negatively force yourself to think positively and force yourself to find the good in everything. This way, your brain(in the long run) will be used to finding those positives and automatically make them run through your mind and soon enough all this will change. Best of luck on all of this man. Peace

 

Oke, maybe a late response, but I know how you feel. I have no idea if you (also) had any events or circumstances (I had quite a few) which influenced this behaviour but that could be a leading cause to your negativity. I have had my moments where everyhing just seemed to not work out, I was flunking college, financial problems, I was smoking way to much weed to not think about it, was drinking almost every day. And looking back at that time it was something I wasn't even that aware of.

After I got out of it I started to realise that my negativity came from being very unhapy in general. And there wasn't much that could get me over it to be honest. I had to stop smoking weed to due severe anxiety and paranoia so that helped a little bit. But despite that I just kept spinning in the negativity. And it really sucks but you have to wait for those positive happenings and take advantage of them. This might sound weird, but praise those moments, because for me this is what slowly got me out of it. Every good grade I got back or every girl that smiled at me in public transit was something I would turned into an extremely positive thing to try and even out the negativity.

Eventually I found a girl who made me extremely happy and it felt like this was it. It seemed like after all this time I was at the point of good karma untill she broke up with me last week. It's very hard for me to cope, but there is no other way than just trying to get by day-by-day and enjoy the little things.

 

Just live life to the fullest.