Google Proves Humanity Is Sick and Sad, Yet Absolutely Hilarious

Recently we found out that, according to Google's search, 303,000 people out there were "extremely terrified of Chinese people". We got deeper into Humanity's brain, and got a list of hilarious and scary findings:

Go to the US version of Google, and type what is in bold to find the following:

• 5,310,000 pages from people asking or answering: How to get pregnant.
• 69,400,000 people asking How to make money.
• 32,600,000: How to get over someone.
• 3,290,000: Who do I have to be to make you sleep with me.
• 841,000: I have a large cat in my pants.
• 3,300,000: I have a large uterus.
• 112,000: I have a lovely bunch of coconuts (lots of swallows surfing the web).
• 256,000,000: I want to die.
• 3,160,000: Why do I fart so much.
• 528,000: Why do indians smell.
• 63,500,000: Why do I sleep so much.
• 680,000: Why do I have green poop.
• 883,000,000: Why do I have no friends.
• 7,570,000: Why do I have diarrhea.
• 4,170,000: Why do I have so much discharge.
• 7,120,000: Why do I have to pee so much.
• 230,000,000: Why do I have gas or so much gas.
• 456,000: Why do men have nipples.
• 6,000,000: Why men don't call.
• 8,380,000: Why men lie.
• 11,000,000: Why women have affairs.
• 36,500,000: Why women lie.
• 94,200,000: Why Obama should be president.
• 19,100,000: Why Obama should not be president.
• 42,300: Why Luke Skywalker is an idiot.
• 1,610,000: I would like to buy a hamburger.
• 286,000: I would like to extend you an invitation to the pants party (at Jason's house, in Jason's pants).
• 818,000: I think im pregnant.
• 442,000: I hate Indiana Jones 4.
• Almost 800,000,000: Who do I vote for.
• 4,980,000: I want a new drug.
• 114,000,000: I want a wife (114 million people are nuts).
• 783,000: I have one testicle.
• 21,900,000: I have one more drink.
• 12,400,000: I have three breasts.
• 320,000: I have three testicles.
• 1,580,000: I have three girlfriends.
• 610,000: I have four sides, all opposite sides are parallel, I have no right angles. What am I.
• 159,000,000: When to work.
• 126,000,000: When to say I love you.
• 2,730,000: Sleep is for sissies.
• 2,890,000: I smeel like poop.
• 1,510,000: What is a recession.
• 1,400,000: I have a hard time swallowing.
• 338,000: I have a big bag of crabs here.
• 1,060,000: Sex is for making babies and revenge.

We. Are. Doomed.



For all pictures go to: http://i.gizmodo.com/photogallery/googlesearchresults/1006983957

Reference: http://i.gizmodo.com/5152141/google-proves-humanity-is-sick-and-sad-yet-absolutely-hilarious

 

Haha funny shiz lol

 

Change humanity to Americans.

 

Good, hallarious google is my favourite site on the internet no matter what anyone says.

 

My favorite is defintely the one about the babies and revenge. Yeah.. there are 30.9 million results for "How to last longer on your first time". Go figure.

 

That is great =] I wonder what else you can type in... I am gunna go try.

 

Omfg....I Lol'd Irl so hard

 

hahaha, I lol'd at the green poo one

 

rofl , Thats some funny shit

 

lol'ed xD

 

Isn't as funny as some of them listed up there. People are messed.

 

Look up porn on google, 246,000,000 results

/pass

 

Did you even look at any of them? Most of them are way better results (surprisingly)

 

23,000 : Runescape Ruined my Life
2,400,000 : I got Raped and I love it ( More results then just "I got Raped)

 

lmfao, kinda random stuff?

 

Because that's a compound query that will not only return results consisting of both, it will return results consisting of one or the other...>_<

 

Lol, I knew when my first time was going to be, and I actually searched something similare, except it was more like "How long did you last your first time?"

 

Ha, some of those are pretty funny. Type in "Porn" aka Pron and see how many search results etc there are. You'll realize how messed up this world is.

 

this is funny, why do i have no friends lol

 

priceless, hahaha

favourite was

"sex is for making babies and revenge"