Whys life been horrible to me..

Hey Sythe... Well I am writing this up because I figured i just need the support and life's been really rough for me lately... Right now, today, I got news that my Grandma will be passing away in the fight against cancer in the next few days.. I honestly don't know if i can handle any more deaths in my family:/
This past few months I've had over 7 family members die in really horrible outcomes... I just don't know what I can do anymore.

First, My uncle passed from a very painful and horrible colon cancer and I didn't even get to say goodbye to him... Then my friend was hit by a car and was brutally killed by the accident :/ Once again, I didn't get to say goodbye.

My great grandpa about a month ago died right before i saw him... I was on my way to drive over and called him saying I would be there soon to hang out with them.. When I got to his house and came in he was dead on his couch...

The worst of them all was my aunt and uncle were having fighting and problems.. So they .. well i don't want to talk about this one so heres the write up on it:/

"ST. LOUIS PARK, Minn. (WCCO) — Police said a man and his estranged wife are dead after an apparent murder-suicide.

Officers said it started Monday night when the woman was shot to death in a parking lot along Highway 100 and Cedar Lake Road in St. Louis Park. She has been identified as 51-year-old Stephanie Maxam. The man’s identity has not been released.

Police said witnesses heard Maxam and her estranged husband arguing in the parking lot around 8 p.m. when the man opened fire.

“(We) arrived to find an adult female dead of multiple gunshot wounds. Apparently a witness did hear gunshots and then saw that the victim was in the parking lot,” said St. Louis Park Spokesman Jamie Zwilling. “We began a search immediately for her estranged husband.”

The man was found a short time later lying near a curb in Minneapolis. He was dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound, police said.

Officers recovered what appears to be a shotgun at the scene, at 37th Street Northeast and Hiawatha in Minneapolis. But police aren’t saying if it was the weapon used to kill the woman.

Officers said they also found an envelope with a handwritten note inside. It wasn’t released what the note said.

Police say it is fortunate that bystanders were not hit and no one else was injured.

“It’s a scary thing because we are in the parking lot a lot and sometimes we do leave around 8 at night,” said Nichole Knutson.

On Monday night, however, Knutson left the Parkdale Plaza before 8 p.m. When she came back Tuesday morning, she heard that a man had shot and killed a woman and drove away.

According to court records, Maxam and her husband went through a divorce in 2006.

The story hits home at the Harriet Tubman Center, which offers assistance for victims of domestic violence. Experts say they hope tragedies like this are a reminder that one-in-four women is a victim of domestic violence in her lifetime.

“Domestic violence reports are up, fatalities are actually down. One could look at that and say absolutely, all of the prevention messages on how to get help and how to give help are being heard,” said Jen Polzin, of the Tubman Center.

Harriet Tubman is in the process of locating one of their centers to a former monastery in Maplewood. In January, there will be beds for 64 victims of domestic violence and their families."

Whats really bad about this is its been all around the news lately here and people either have no idea about it, or are making fun of it in front of my face and it just hurts.......
Idk what to do anymore :/ I've been going on Runescape to get away from my problems.. I can't handle any more deaths.. what do i do? There's more problems and deaths.. but right now i cant handle more typing :/

Why does life hate me so much? :/

 

This is going to sound like I'm being a [insert word here], but I think it's just time you need. You're not expected to get over a death/deaths within a day. Just ignore what other people say, it's not their problem, it's yours. You know what's right. I hope you can get over this and feel better.

 

Thanks.. but its like when ever i try to get over it another problem just happens and it keeps building on it :/ i really cant take that anymore...

 

Hi Cane

I just want to start off by saying that you are very brave for coming here and talking about what you have been experiencing lately. The amount of deaths in your family you have had to endure lately is very unusual, and I can only imagine the pain that you have had to deal with as these things have been piling up for you. Nobody should ever have to lose so many loved ones in such a short amount of time.

Sm321 is right when he says that deaths take time to get over. Everybody is different in how long it takes them to accept, acknowledge, and learn to cope with the death(s) of loved ones, but the process is an ongoing thing, and in a sense a journey of it's own. You must give yourself time to feel and to hurt, time to reflect and accept, and time to start inching forwards again in an effort to move on from these horrible events.

I know it sounds cheesy to suggest getting "professional help", but there are grief counsellors out there for a reason. Maybe what you need more than anything right now, is somebody to actually TALK to, and somebody to guide you through the subsequent states of grief that appear after a traumatic event like the loss of a family member (or multiple, in your case). I would highly suggest approaching a counsellor at your school, or asking your family to help you get a professional one outside of school if you are more comfortable with that. Those sorts of people are professionals, and used to dealing with people who have experienced horrifying events and they CAN help you, if you let them.

Good luck my friend, I hope that life gets better for you and that you can see the sunshine in your life again some day. If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me or add me on MSN

 

Thanks Zerker.. Might be able to use some PM's or just a friend right now.. And thats kinda why I wanted to post this on here because since I don't have to face anyone to talk about it, I just feel a little more secure and better about it :/ im scared to go into a councler or someone because I really don't want to be judged by anyone anymore...

Thanks though, If i build the courage to go in and talk to someone about all of this i might:/ Just a hard hard time from loosing friends, Relitives, Family, and now maybe my grandma :/ Idk i recently lost a sister..... Just can't have the heart to talk about that now.. its too soon.. And I learned just today from my mom my friend now was in a very bad accident and i just... I don't know what to do anymore i sincerely don't I'm crying as I type this too you as i just don't know how to cope with all of this anymore... I can't handle any much more :/

 

Things will get better, I promise...we all get our ups and downs - and right now this is a bad time for you, but...it will get better. Just had to drop a post because I couldn't backspace this page without lending a little bit of warmth inside. Hope all goes well with the family in the future. Take care my friend.

 

Thanks Duality :/ I really mean that... I could really use all the support i could get.. And that post may not mean a ton to you, but to me. That short post or words showing u gave time to say goodluck.. That means a ton to me thanks

 

Mate. I feel your pain, I really don't know what else to say. Try to be strong and focus on that, I wish you best of luck You have my prayers

 

Hey bro if your feeling down or just want to talk hit me up at
[email protected] I wouldn't mind being a broski.

 

Thx sam and pepsi.. IDK its just sooo hard to handle in life now..

 

You don't have to worry about a counselor judging you. They are professionals, and are trained to help people who need to talk about their issues and work through emotionally traumatic events, like you have been experiencing. I know they can be intimidating and don't work for everybody, but in your case I think it would be worth a try seeing as you have so much going on in your life at the moment.

 

Yeah i know that.. But its not about that its more or less about my parents.. They wouldn't really pay for it and they don't know about some of the deaths as ive kept my friends suicide a secret and yeah :/

 

I didn't see this coming, you lost a lot of people in such a short period of time. You are indeed a very strong person.

I really cannot say how hard it is to lose someone close to you, fortunately it's never really happened to me. But I could only imagine, and I know it would be 100x worse if it was reality.

People come and go. Everyone goes eventually, it does take some time getting over the death of someone dear to you. This would have been so much easier for you if it happened in a longer period of time, but that's not the case.

 

Try a school counselor. They are 100% free and are there for the kids that need it

 

All I can say is life's tough on some more than others and it's seems as if it's been pretty tough on you these past few months. Just please try to keep your chin up and see this out, I pray that you don't have another death in your family and that things can only get better. Time is a healer and that's just what you need, in the meantime try hanging out with friends or something as much as possible to take your mind off what's going on, as this will ease the pain.

Best Wishes!

 

I've lost an Uncle to suicide and my Grandfather to a rare food poisoning. I was very upset when both events occurred but time heals all wounds. Best of luck!

 

Thanks guys, for everyone of you contributing to helping me out... I just got the news thismorning that there is no chance of my grandma making it from the cancer :'{ I really cant handle any more of this shite... Its too hard.. and when i tryed a school councler all it did was make me feel like crap. but thanks for trying zerker

 

I recommend you heed this advice. I started talking to my school counselor freshman year and she helped me throughout high-school and I could go to her for anything. Even though she couldn't fix the problems, it was nice to have someone listen to me. Even to this day I still talk to her, she's like a mother to me.

 

Life is what you make out if it. I personally have had my cousin (who i looked up to) kill himself when I was 15, my grandpa died of cancer when i was 13, my younger cousin has leukemia, but is doing well, and also my best friend killed herself when I was 16, among many others.

Its difficult to deal with people close to you dying, but its important to continue on as that is what they likely would want. As I have aged I have realized that I have used their deaths to make me stronger, if you can live through the pain you feel then you soon realize that there are endless possibilities you can accomplish.

 

Thanks annex... And im doing my best to get through my pain