Legal and Moral Advice: Suicide

I'm posting here because I have no where else to turn and I'm nervous. Before I start, this story is 100% serious, although it may seem too outrageous to be true.

I'll try to keep this short.

Prefix: Last December I was over at a friends house. I had a strong vibe at this time he might have been bi or homosexual. It had been a night of drinking and I passed out in his room on the floor. He woke me at a late hour asking me to come in his bed so he could tell me something; I then fell asleep as he was talking. Some time later I woke to him taking off my pants. I couldn't move, I felt I had been drugged. I knew he had muscle relaxers, and he also kept pouring me shots in the bathroom and got mad when I denied the shot. So I was frozen in place and felt helpless. He then proceeded to perform oral and touch me in multiple places in and on my gentital areas for about 10 minutes. He also took pictures and was masturbating the whole time.

Don't ask me why I didn't say anything. I was petrified and there was another guy in the room, plus I was drugged.

The next day I left in a hurry for obvious reasons. I called him once I got back and told him what I knew. He denies a few times but eventually admitted to all of it. He said not to tell anyone and if I did he would contemplate suicide because it would devastate his family and future career.

A week went by and he begged us to still be friends. I told him I wouldn't feel comfortable doing so because of what he did. A month went by of him begging and me telling him no. He then said the only way I can go on is if we're fiends again otherwise it's suicide. I told him I would get him help, and he said if he catches a **** of me getting help he'll end it.

I tried ignoring him, but then he got aggressive and told me I WAS RIDICULOUS for not wanting to be friends with him. I became aggressive as well, telling him he was a piece of shit sexual assaulter and I didn't care what happened to him.

He would show up at my place of residence unannounced and not leave until I talked to him. I would scream at him and tell him i'de call the cops of he didn't leave, but again he threatened suicide. This went on from January until May until I moved far away for my job temporarily.

He has texted me two or three times a week giving me suicide dates but I have been ignoring everything and he has not followed through on any of the dates. I am almost about to move back where I'm in driving distance from him and he says he is going to force encounters if I dont talk to him via text or Face Book.

My current plan is to keep ignoring him. I'm personally pissed beyond belief, even when I hear his name. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this.

Question One: Legally, can I be held responsible for him committing suicide? This is what is most nerve racking for me. I'm afraid if I get him help he'll pull the trigger.

Question Two: Am I being morally acceptable? I feel as if I'm the victim here, not him. Eventually I started sending him nasty texts because I was fed up and couldn't handle it. But am I being unreasonable?

If you have any more questions or need details let me know. I know this was brief, and this is a really fucked up situation.

Thanks,
An Active Member on Sythe

 

Question One: No

Question Two: Personally I would have called the police, or kicked the shit out of him. He raped you and you can't just let that slip...

 

In no way would you be responsible. If it was the other way around, and he took advantage of you and god forbid, you commited suicide, I'd say he would definitely be responsible if people knew about the events that took place.

Honestly, this sounds very outrageous indeed. Like Shoop has said, I would have definitely called the police. This is plain harassment. Now I don't know if you want him to pay for the sexual acts against you, as you WERE taken advantage of but if he doesn't leave you alone, something has to be done. Who knows that aggresivness could turn violent. People are unpredictable and are clearly capable of many things.

 

I'm just going to start posting unanimously now, it'll be easier.

I've read a bit about suicide and negligence. It seems if you're proven to be negligent in not reporting a suicide with prior knowledge, you could be help responsible. I have evidence to show this individual did the acts (via him admitting over various multimedia sources), but I can't help but think I can still be responsible.

Part of the reason I don't want to cause physical violence is because I don't want to involve my other friends. A lot of his friends are my close friends, and I don't want to make a clusterfuck out of the situation, if you can see where I'm coming from.

In fact, I don't want him to pay for anything. The only request I have asked is that he leave me alone forever. The thing that is most disturbing is not the fact that he did these sexual acts, but the fact he's so desperate and willing to force his life in my hands. The feeling is rather surreal.

I've seen a private investigator, and believe it or not, she has seen cases like this (very hard to believe). Off the record, they said they wouldn't blame me for letting him go ahead with the deed, and I could not get in any trouble. But this could just be them trying to lighten the mood. Hard to tell.

Thanks for the reply both of you. It's good to know I'm not "acting unfair and ridiculous."

 

Honestly if I were you, text him saying okay we can be friends again come over and when he comes over just beat him to the point where he wish he had committed sucide.

 

Why the hell would you sympathize for someone who drugged and raped you? If I were you I would have reported him to the police for rape and not have given two shits about him after that.

 

three options mate:

1st: ignore him and when he gets agressive or even wants to beat you, kick the shit out of him ( if you can't do it by yourself, ask friends)
2nd: talk with him and tell him that you don't want to do stuff like that
3rd: report him at the police

 

Yeah I've already done option 2... Looks like its 1 or 3 now.

Still looking for definite legal advice.

 

First one definetly no.
Second one, why suicide? I would call another authority or take a psychologist or idk, just to save the life.

 

call the police. You don't have to tell him about the rape but you should tell them about his threats to commit suicide. They will go and take him to get an evaluation. Most of the time if people announce ahead of time they are going to kill themselves its not true. but I am not sure how many of them were rapists. Who would know if you let the piece of shit rapist die anyways. Some guy drugged and raped me I would be encouraging him to kill himself

 

The only thing is he said he'll deny any claims and say it wasn't him if I present evidence. This would alert him that I did something.

 

Obviously he would deny it, but it might scare him to leave you alone. The athorities may not have proof of this, but they wont ignore it. They will from a distance, observe, and if they see that he is bothering you, through phonecalls or emails/texts, then this might give them more proof to investigate further. Then he will have to leave you alone once he sees that the police are looking futher into it.

It will then make him slip, and provide the proof needed to possibly get a restraining order or even jail time.

Do not let him control you. Just because he says he will deny, doesnt mean its over. Fight back.

 

Wow... That is truly shocking and a very fucked up situation.

You should not be feeling sympathetic at all, what he done is morally and legally unacceptable, you have done NOTHING wrong.

Change your number, block all communications online (FB/MSN/SKYPE), and if he turns up at your door call the police and declare harassment.

If for whatever reason you get forced into contact with him, e.g. bump into him in the street, remind him you could have done for sexual assault and demand he stay the fuck away from you, or threaten to tell his family and friends whats happened. The real people who commit suicide just do it without telling everyone or making threats. He's just being a pyscho and trying to blackmail you with threats of suicide, he is NEVER going to pull through with it.

 

call the cops on his homo ass and file a rape charge