Confusing Situation

My structure of my paragraphs are fragmented, I tend to shoot around. Lot's on my mind, and I cant get it down on paper correctly.

I'm going through this stage. It bother's me honestly. I know she's fucking other guys. I fucked another girl, but it wasn't anything. Literally was just a mistake on my part. Anyways, It was a 2 year relationship. I'm 18, she's 16. We've been through the worst, in every way. I'm serious.

My ex-girlfriend was amazing. She has had a fucked up life from the start. Her dad beat her mom, choked her till she passed out, tried to kill her, done drug deals, etc.. all in front of her at her toddler ages. Her brother is in drug rehab for the third time, and she says he isn't getting any better. She's very depressed, and hates her life. She's told me that she thinks about suicide daily.

Me, I'm 18, i workout everything, i have a body builder body, and etc. I'm not an ugly dude. She was and still is physically attracted to me still.

So, I decided to hack her Facebook (wasn't hard), and I see messages between her and guys, with her going onto them as in hitting on them, saying there sexy, etc. As I said before, I know she's fucking other guys. Don't know why, but yeah. I'm more towards the leaving point, but I keep looking back. It's not that i hate her, (of course im extremely pissed at what she's doing) but why is she doing this? Is it a phase? Should I even tolerate it and even consider getting together later in the future? Everything is so confusing. I'm currently talking to another girl, but it isn't the same. It's like losing the other half of me. I don't do anything anymore, All i do is play rs sadly. Like cool, what a life I have now. I don't plan on telling anyone IRL, too ashamed to. She's done horrible mistakes, hurting me badly. But I honestly know, they were mistakes on her part, being young. And just looking to gain her experience, like R2 said.

Also, even though we aren't together, I feel like if I fuck another girl again, i'm betraying her. I honestly love this girl. I know she's confused and shit. She's just going down the wrong hill, and I cannot help her any more then I already tried to. She's basically becoming that slut everyone knows about, doing drugs, and drinking till she can't remember. I dont want to date someone of that reputation. How do I handle a situation of this?

It's hard to say everything, being that I cannot pour over two years of my relationship into this one thread, you won't fully understand where i'm coming from. Please, don't give me a bullshit response to get your post count up. This is something that I think about every single second of every day. I really could use a wise opinion from someone that understands my situation, not a 16 year old who has a happy 1 year. You have no idea what I'm talking about.

 

Honestly...Time will heal all wounds...You are both young, I know that your fist love seems like the only love, but there will be others...If the current girl you're talking to doesn't feel right, then maybe it isn't...but there is someone else out there that will make you just as happy or more so...


also, I know this doesn't help you in any way...but I kind had to make your post into a freestyle because I'm drunk..




My structure of my paragraphs are fragmented, I tend to shoot around.
Lot's on my mind, and I cant get it down on paper correctly. I feel down mentally, can't make a sound.

I'm going through this stage, honestly. I know she's fucking other guys
I fucked another girl, but it wasn't anything, it bothers me, no suprise.

Literally was just a mistake on my part. Anyways, It was a 2 year relationship.
I'm 18, she's 16. We've been through the worst, in every way. I feel I wasted it.

My ex-girlfriend was amazing. She has had a fucked up life from the start.
Her dad beat her mom, choked her till she passed out and stopped her heart.
tried to kill her, done drug deals, all in front of her at her toddler ages.
Her brother is in drug rehab for the third time. always amazes, me she can take this without rage fits.

she says he isn't getting any better. She's very depressed,
hates her life, shes stressed, the whole things a fucking mess

She's told me that she thinks about suicide daily.
I don't know, maybe she has lost it and is fucking crazy.

Me, I'm 18, i workout everything, i have a body builder body, ready to kill
I'm not an ugly dude or anything and Shes physically attracted to me still.

So, I decided to hack her Facebook and I see messages between her and guys,
no lies, she's hitting on them, saying there sexy and have nice eyes

As I said before, I know she's fucking other people. Don't know why. I want to attack
but I keep looking back, this bitch has me crazy until I don't know how to act.

It's not that i hate her, but why is she doing this, im pissed.
Is it a phase? is she in the midst of a bucket list, ready to cut her wrists.

Should I even tolerate it or even consider getting together later
in the future? all this hate, it makes me feel like shes a fucking traitor

I'm currently talking to another girl, but it isn't the same.
It's like losing the other half of my brain, im in pain.

I don't do anything anymore, All i do is play rs sadly.
Like cool, I'd wipe her from my mind glady, but still miss her badly.

I don't plan on telling anyone IRL, too ashamed to. She's done horrible mistakes, acting dumb.
it makes me ache, but still know the state of being young

Also, even though we aren't together, I feel like if I fuck another girl again, i'm betraying her. but still.
I honestly love this girl. I've never hated her. not trying to be dr. phil She's just going down the wrong hill
and I cannot help her any more then I already tried to. Im sick of being lied to., wtf is that about.
She's basically becoming that slut everyone knows about, doing drugs, and drinking stout, until she passes out,

I dont want to date someone of that reputation. How do I handle a situation
my lifes a mutation, and im just patiently waiting to get over the frustration.

It's hard to say everything, being that I cannot pour over two years of my relationship
I hate this shit. im done, I don't feel like Im making it.

 

Hey , the situation you are in is truly very confusing. She's taken loads of shit and grew up in such a hostile environment. Chances are, she is behaving like this because of past, her family.

 

I would hope this be a reason, and she just get past it. Maybe i jusst need to let her go. IDK

 

Well understandable that she has turned out doing things like that with the past she has had, she has saw some distressing things and it has taken it's toll.

You could try to get with her now to try and get her to stop what she is doing, as her boyfriend (if you get with her) you will have more influence over her and should be able to convince her to stop doing what she is doing and get her life sorted.
She sounds like the type of person to cheat though and if a girl cheats on me I never forgive them. I think you shouldn't either.

Although, I think you're too involved. Hacking her Facebook was too far in my opinion, if she found out what do you think she would do?

 

Understandable. If she found out i hacked her fb, she would just ask why. I'd just be like because I care. It's just sad to see someone you care about go down a road like this.

ALSO: she called me 3 times today, i didn't answer purposely. Then she texted me a love text that i sent her when we broke up. WTF does this mean?

 

Just phone her up and ask her what it means, you should find out what she wants from that phone call.
Then assess your situation from there.

 

So she called me again, i answered. She was drunk i believe... She was like: why are you dating white trash from the ghetto? i just hung up.

 

Talk to her when she is sober then (No hangover) and talk to her. TBH, it seems to me that it will turn out badly, and I would ditch before it gets any worse. Find another girl.

 

It's not like that. You didn't fully understand what I wrote. I have this thing with another girl as well. Not nearly the same.

OT: I've talked to her on the phone lastnight, a real talk. Shit went well. She wants me back. She doesn't know if she "Loves" me. Idk but we might see each other this weekend. It's whatever. After this weekend, i'll find out what is really going on.

 

she probably just hasnt had a good male figure in her life, and is looking for validation from other male figures (other guys). just doing what humans do, understand that she has problems, and work with it or leave her. no matter what, remember YOUR OWN life, goals, and happiness is the most important thing to yourself

 

Very true. That's one thing that get's pushed to the side.

OT: Talked to her again last night. It was a nice normal convo, she got grounded earlier and wasn't allowed to use the phone, she called me, we talked for a few hours, then she got caught, and ended hanging up 10 mins later. Shes calling me again, for better or worse. Idk whats going to happen.

 

Be straight up and dont overthink it you may misconstrue things.