Sweet ass

A man calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."
Without a second thought, he takes off after her.
A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up.
The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.
On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.
He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning and beautiful woman he has ever seen in his life.
She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me."
Well, he's out the door after her like a shot.
This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck.
So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.
Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,"If I catch you, you are mine!!!"
He lost 63 pounds that week.

 

i dont even have to read this one to know your not funny...

 

Do you have any life what so ever or would you rather find every thread made by me to insult me? You might want to think twice before you tried to start an argument with me because the shit won't be pretty.

 

shut the fuck up newfag

 

The mutilated carcass of roadkill that I saw earlier today was more humorous than this.

 

Newfags gtfo pls.

 

go suck a cock

 

you see what you say dosent even bother me because i know that ill always be better then you because your jewish

 

Newfag lol. You obviously don't know who I am. Just take your triple digit post count, and 09 join date and get a fucking life.

 

damn if only i didnt join a few years ago and have a higher postcount i wouldnt feel so left out... PAUSE

 

Post count doesn't really have anything to do with it. The fact that you act like you do tells me everything I need to know. How old are you? 12? I guess you white children don't really have much to do with your life since your parents have you on such a short leash.

 

lmao im 16 and white children?? wtf are you?

 

You should have kept twelve. It fits better with your personality. Now you just look like a sixteen year old reject who is very immature.

 

i asked you what race you were dipshit because i know for a fact that you cant say shit to me about being white

 

haha ironic thats how all of your people were killed...

 

My race is no importance to you, but if you put two and two together you'll know that I'm not white, or can you not manage numbers that big?

 

I'm pretty sure more white people died in 9/11 than arabs..

And don't get my started on the Holocaust.

 

i was refuring to jews fuckface and thats funny how the only way anyone would attack america is by sneak attack, there is nothing want to see more then the u.s nuke all the fucking disgusting shitfaced towelheaded countries

way to edit your post faggot, and lets get you started on it see how much you know about it..