How to make yourself Sick.

Table of Contents
I - Why would you do this
II - How to start
III - You're a sick child, you know that?
IV - Get down with the sickness
*V* - FAQ'S & etc

Why you would want to do this

Ok, so making yourself can be useful. It can help you miss work, miss an event you don't want to attend, call in work sick, and also be sick, just to be sick. So, let us begin.

How to Start

Firstly - If you're trying to stay home from school, always tell them that you don't feel well the night before, but reasure them that you'll "probably" feel better the next day. Next, go to your kitchen, and grab a cup of coffee , now go to sleep early, hide the cup o' joe in your bedroom, don't brush your teeth. Now your parents think you're asleep, so it's time to put your play into action.

You're a sick child, you know that?

Next, pretend to be having stomach problems, don't go cry to mom just yet, just make sure your parents are awake, and go to the bathroom with the coffee cup, poor half the coffee into the toilet, make gagging noises, flush the toilet, then cough. Next, poor half of the remaining half of the coffee down, so it looks like there IS some throw-up or "puke/barf" as you prefer. Don't go to sleep that night, so you can have bags under your eyes. So, here comes the good part, Morning Breath, don't brush your teeth in the morning eithier!! Now, your parents can smell the "barf", making your story even more believable. Be sluggish on breakfast, and hopefully a parent will notice. Act like you are enthusiastic about going to school, and right about 15 minutes before your bus comes to pick you up, fake some diahrea. Now, take
the remaining 1\4 of coffee, and poor it down the toilet, and don't flush , until mom or dad comes in, and sees it, but don't let them see it by full detail! So as soon as you see they can see it , flush it!!! Ok, so you're now doing pretty bad, as your parent thinks. If you can, heating up a hot-pocket or hot water against your head, will make it seem like you're running an fever.

Get Down With the Sickness

You're now probably home, however, that means an parents going to be home, and if they suspect you're not sick, they'll notice the child usually never puts and effort into being sick after the parent is home (a.k.a. the day is over), so you really can't stay home 2 days in a row, because of lack of effort. However, incase you want your parent to NOT know you stayed home because of playing hookie, then I suggest, going onto the computer upon 5-15 minutes before your parent gets home, and go to www.omahug.org/krusty/s2, and look at the picture displayed for about 5-15 minutes, it'll make you dizzy a bit, and it'll make you easy on your stomach, but not actually sick(don't look at the website now unless you're trying to be sick tommorrow!). Congratulations, you've faked a sickness.:nuts:

FAQ's

Q: Why would I use this guide?
A: Honestly, I don't care. It's an useful way, of how to make yourself seem sick, and honestly, it DOES help!

Q: Why do you want the website you mentioned not to be used unless we're trying to get ourselves sick? Is it adult?
A: No, no "porno" or anything! It's just an illusion, that is actually really hard to pay attention to, and it makes your stomach feel uneasy, like you were going to actually throw up.

Q: Wow, this guide works! Are you going to make more guides like this?
A: Yes and no. I'm going to make guides, that will help sythe forumers, but not like this. I don't base guides off of each other(like sequels etc.)


Thank you, if you have any questions - PM me through sythe, to help me improve my guide.

Plagirizing this guide is not up for discussion.

 

Haha, it's very descriptive and does include pictures. Add a disclaimer letting people know they could get grounded/beaten/sacked if they get caught.

 

That picture link doesn't work, nice guide none the less. My method is also quite good; drink warm salty water

 

Lol good guide.

 

lol beaten, good guide dood

 

Wow, very nice guide, but is there a way to get the "barf" water to have chunks of food or w/e in it? If it had chunks of food in it, it would make it look real.

 

nice guide and thanks

 

Oatmeal. Preferablly non-dinosaur ones(I know some of you need Dinosaurs to eat 'yer oatmeal!), so do Rasin Oatmeal.

 

Lol, nice guide. Good pictures, but try adding a little color.

 

Very well detailed. Guide does seem it will work. But I agree with dark, if caught, run.

 

=] Mah guides are sexy.

ATM Applying to become an User Educator + Trying to think about two more topics for 5 guides total.

 

lol a good guide i might use it when school starts

 

Lol,Pretty nice guide 8/10 for writing,the pictures,and details of Guide.

Also,if you want to have some fun and shorter guide,rent Ferris Buellers Day off

 

>_<

=\ Movie sucked... the kid only could act in back to the future ....::...::....


Ok, let's not get off-topic. :laugh: :nuts: ^_^ :idea:

 

Haha! Great guide, and very funny.

 

Lol, guess who might not go to the first day of school?

 

You should add the oatmeal part to it then .

 

Oatmeal part isn't necessary, it's just an add-on, a prop if you will.

 

http://www.sythe.org/showthread.php?p=3389974&posted=1#post3389974


Sorry for double posting, but Just figured I'd show you guys my UE application to see my other guides or give me support ^_^ .

 

lmao good guide ill have to try this.