Reported Post by MRangeM

MRangeM · May 27, 2013

MRangeM has reported a post.

Reason:

Please delete this thread for personal reasons.

Thanks.
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Post: College Acceptence/Depression
Forum: Personal Support
Assigned Moderators: RwmRS2

Posted by: MRangeM
Original Content:

So I'm in High School.

My parents always yell at me about my grades and importance for College, but I personally think that my grades I have are good enough for a average College in the computer technology industry.

My grades currently are mostly B+'s, sometimes A's or on the contrary C's in basic academic courses, but my yearly average is always B or more. In Spanish I break out with C's, I have never been good but I try hard. Currently, I enroll in optional courses based on computers. Computer programming, BCA, etc. I almost always get a yearly average of A.

I did a sport Freshman year, and volunteer year long, however that may affect the application process.

My question is, do Average schools hold C or two as a big change in their decision process?

My mother has always been a 4.0 student, and is a English teacher. She constantly harasses me on her disappointment and insist that I can do better, no matter how I explain that I try my best in school. She makes me feel like a disgrace to the family.

My Dad, on the contrary was a C student but big in sports. After I quit soccer after all my life he showed a lack in interest in me. He tells me that he supports me in all my choices but I can obviously see the point he is getting across. Usually he is on business for 5/7 days a week so his time home is being more dedicated towards movements in his life now (He recently was diagnosed with diabetes).

On a side note with this, my friendships in school have been lacking. I find myself being a lot more self sustained and not participating in any activities. Nothing in life is of interest for me because of my constant worry of failure of the simplest of tasks. I am developing an anxiety in school and not sure what to do.

Relationships don't appeal to me at all. After entering high school I stopped having any conversations about the topic. My 'relationship' in middle school really made me realize the pointless, selfishness of dating in high school (My opinion).

On another note, I have given up on myself in terms of wait, gaining 30 pounds in a matter of 4 months and can't find any practice that I can stick to to lose it. If you have any creative ideas for losing weight it could really boost my self esteem.

At times I contemplate suicide but have never taken any steps towards it besides planning it out. I'm not sure what to do with my life at this point. I find joy on the internet and games but everyone around me tries to drag me away from it. I am trying to use these forums to practice commitments towards developing ideas I get on the daily and it seems to help, but I find it hard to translate out of a forum website.

tl;dr I'm confused and have no idea what to do with my life. I need some sort of self establishment and guidance.
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R · May 27, 2013

done bud, hope all is well

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