Self-Conscious Of Myself Big Time

Well when i was five years old i got hit in the head by a semi going 70 MPH on the highway. I had less than 10% chance of living and the doctors told my parents i would not be able to walk or talk again if i did live.

when i was about 10 years old i started to notice my moms drinking problem, so i blamed itt on myself, and started hanging out with bad people letting them make fun of me and call me stupid crippled and when you were born the worlds IQ dropped, much more. also my parents got divorced also.

I let them do this to me from 6th-11th grade. I would just go to school get in fights cuss teachers out, and let them make fun of me. then go home play runescape 12+ hrs a day.


In the last two years of high school i went to live with my mom. Why i give her chance after chance after no1 else does IDK. anyway she tried to stab me when i told her not to smoke around me and threw her cigs outside. she punched her mom sister cussed out my 4 yr old cuses.


then in the 12th grade i started to get back on track. hanging out going to party's and stuff. then in college i started to then i wouldnt bc i would think of other ppl saying that stuff.


I have never been on a date and i feel like i never will in my life bc how can any1 like some1 like me thats not good looking and handicapped

 

Now you're older things are completely different mate, when you were at school kids don't like different people. I hate to admit it, but I used to be called a bit of a bully, now when I look back I think why the hell did I do those things, I was an idiot. Now you're older and the people around you are as well, everyone has matured and people stop doing stupid things.

I don't know what to say about your mother, but I personally think there is something wrong with her, you'd have to be crazy to try and stab someone, especially your own son, I'd suggest trying to get her some help.

As for your picture, you look perfectly normal, I don't see any reason why a girl wouldn't want to be with you, also based on what you have said you seem like a nice guy so you should be fine getting girls.

 

Confidence is key dude, I'm not going to give you lateral advice, more of a pep talk

You're not a bad looking dude (No Homo)
Don't blame yourself for others mistakes, It's not your fault your mother's an alcoholic, I'm sure she has her reasons and can figure it out for herself.
Get yourself out there dating man, don't seclude yourself from the world, use your disfigurement as an advantage and use the 'confidence is key' and put your take on it, I can assure you your problems won't persist now you've gotten older.

 

Your hand is the only thing that gives off a sense of "handicap" apart from that, you look like a young, healthly, goodlooking(no homo) guy!
Don't dwell on the past, man.
You're beyond that now!

 

yea thanks and easier said than done

 

Ahah, I know
But, you have nothing to worry about as far as your personal appearence!

 

My younger cousin is handicapped as well as none of her fingers have never grown properly. She's allowed herself to be on dates, and she's never given up. You're not a bad person, you're just in the dark. Let the world know who you are. Don't be afraid of yourself. Don't let others be afraid of you. Your appearance don't mean a thing.

 

but what if they dont like me or break up with me or dont show up to the date

 

Thing happens man, you have to overcome those fears. It's better to try and fail then to never try at all, remember? Personally, I wouldn't think about other people and just do your own thing. Who cares what people think about you? As long as you're happy yourself then everyone else around you can just fuck off. Excuse the language . That's how I look at it. If you want to make a fool out of yourself in public, then go for it. Don't worry about what you think people are saying in their heads around you. I know it's not easy to do but it's something to work on. Having that ability to not worry so much about what everyone else thinks about you will make things a hell of a lot easier in the long run.

I'm not saying to go run out in public and start screaming or anything like that. But I mean hey, talk to that girl that's cute in your group in class. Meet some new people, try to socialize as much as you can or want to. Maybe try going out of your comfort zone a little bit

 

As far as dating goes. Set your expectations lower. Start talking to a girl and you have to look for personality and not the looks. If you like how she acts and you KNOW that you like to be around her. Go for it. Rejection is a 5 second thing. It might hurt when it happens but the next day comes and you're fine. You need to know for sure if this is a girl that you're interested in. You have to attempt to hang out with her and not leave it to her to contact you. I really hope ANYTHING helped. Good Luck bro.

Sidenote: Try some different things (Changing Look mainly). I got my first girlfriend about 2 weeks after I did this, and honestly since then, I haven't really been "out of options" as far as the dating scene. I shaved my head, started working out, and the good outer look brings them in. You just have to sink it .

Once again. Good luck mate.

 

MSN IS KEY TO A RELATIONSHIP it seems ridiculous but i got a girlfriend through it we didnt talk much in class or anythin but in msn i always knew what to say which is Whenever she sais something like im bored you say i was bored but then you started talking to me AND ADD THE THATS IMPORTANT

Every insignificant detail is significant. Remember that.