why am i such... a burden? Girl help too please?

Hey guys... I feel like i've been such a burden to everyone around me... and I don't know what I should do.

I always make my girl feel bad (she lives away right now, we'll be together soon) because I cause drama for no reason... I feel like a big dick and i hate it because I know i'm not, i always help people :'( ...I always make problems that aren't there. On top of that my parents always yell at me,

i'm currently in college but that's apparently not enough for them. They really want me to get a job, and I've tried but I just can't find one in todays shitty economy, but i will keep trying.

I just feel like my life doesn't have much value, I just seem to do nothing but hurt my girl unintentionally and just otherwise fuck up..

I love my girl to absolute pieces, more than anything in this world. When I make her cry i want to get in my car slam the gas on the free way with a blind fold the wrong direction and never look back.

 

I don't really understand. So the girl on skype was your daughter's daughter?

 

Lmfao im only 18 brah i don't have a daughter or grandaughter. it was my girls cousin. Not related to me

 

sorry to hear all this but god forbid if you ever want to take your own life dont do it by possibly killing a innocent motorist

 

Honestly, and this is from the heart:
Smoke. Weed.
It will seriously make life so much better for you, you'll be way happier.
Guaranteed.

 

How does she think you hurt her?

Do you hit her, argue with her, ignore her?

No one gets hurt for absolutely no reason.

 

This isn't the case for everyone. I smoke a lot of weed and yeah, it makes me happy but I've seen it work out badly for people.

 

smoking and weeding make you addict, it happens a lot of times when u feel deprerssed or burden, just go out for a walk or for a vacation sD

 

Don't smoke weed, it doesn't help you with anything in the long term. All you're going to see is some short term masking of your feelings, which will never go away if you don't do something about them.

If I was you, I would start with your parents. Have you told them you can't find a job for that particular reason? Explain to them the difficulties you have with trying to find one, if they can't understand then that's their problem and you shouldn't feel burdened by that at all. When you get an offer, you get an offer, and until then all you can do is apply for every job you see till you get something.

And about your girlfriend, why do the dramas start in the first place? If its something you're saying, it might be better to hide what you're saying rather than telling her if you know it's going to put pressure on your already separated existence together. Tell her how you really feel and that you don't mean to fight, but that you need to be with her because separation is causing you to be someone you're not when talking to her.

Good luck, just don't get yourself down. Wake up in the morning, forget what has passed and always try to better yourself.

 

its depression mate... i also suffer from it - its best to hit up your local gp and they can provide you with better quality information ! act soon before its too late.

 

dont take drugs to cure depression.

and to OP:
i think you first have to realize that you probably are a dick.
we are what we do.
if we act like assholes then we are assholes.
the good thing is that we can change.
the first thing you need to do is define your shortcomings.
(ex. causing unnecessary drama)
then you simply need to pay attention to what you do.
(when you find yourself causing "unnecessary drama", simply apologize. people will think your a much better guy for doing this)
if you feel like your parents expect more of you then ask them what they expect directly and get a solid answer.

i think you will find that when you have solid goals to work on, instead of vague and abstract ideas, you will both have better success and feel better about yourself as you complete the individual goals.