Marijuana/Future..Security Clearance, Family...slight rant...

It is what it is.

 

I read the whole thing and I would just say quit for ever, it may be hard but it will help in the long run, you say you have girl problems to. That is most likely because of weed, I used to smoke weed when I was young, I used to think I was tough just because I smoked it, girls do not like it at all, they will stay away from you if they know you smoke it.

It's late at the moment but if you want to, pm me your msn and we can talk better on there.

 

It's purely self determination. If you really want to quit, you will. To aid in quitting, pick up something to take your mind off of it like a new sport, or hobby.
As for the whole "security clearance." In order to get them you must take a polygraph asking questions such as have you ever stolen etc. Use of illegal drugs is on the polygraph too... While I'm sure there's restrictions to the use of it, why risking failing a possible polygraph over something so small?

 

Incorrect..ask me about it before assuming reasoning for my problems...

True, but what would make me any more likely to pass the polygraph if I stopped now or if I stopped two months before?

 

Honestly, This sounds like my life story. Almost everything that has happened to you has happened to me. Its hard to deal with trust me, If you honestly love smoking that much. Sit down with your aunt and tell her the benefits, how it's proven that marijuana does not harm you/kill brain cells. It will be hard, I know it will. If you do quit don't pick up harder stuff like popping/snorting pills. Stay clean marijuana is not addictive but it is fairly hard to quit if you're accustomed to smoking a lot.

 

Alright man, let's see..

You should sit down with your cousin, talk to her about how you feel first of all, which should be the easiest step. Next thing to do is try and stop. As much as people here will tell you, smoking won't help you land a job. It may get you friends but once you get older, those aren't the kind of people you want to be around with constantly. (I am in no way trying to offend anyone who smokes/drinks)

You said she had a government job, right? Talk to her and see if you stay off the weed for a while if she could get you a job somewhere. I guarantee if you get a job, you will start smoking a lot less, and even if you don't you'll have money for it. So it's a win win.

If you feel like it's becoming a problem not smoking, then talk to someone about it, but honestly there are so many other things to take your mind off of it.

If you keep smoking, ask yourself, where will you be in 10 years? I myself have no problem with it, but I still want you to think about it. Show her that you are responsible and that you can stay off of it, then she will respect you alot more.

Talk to me on MSN about this, and sorry if my response wasn't that good.

Best of luck man, I know you can do it

 

I've already had these talks..the answer is an absolute no until i'm 18, then they acknowledge they can't stop me.

I'm not sure where you're going with the job thing..

and I wouldn't be much of anywhere different. All I want is a decent house somewhere out of the US with a wife I can talk to and shit, you know.

 

I mean with a job, you'll be at the house a lot less.

Meaning, more money, and less time to smoke.

 

I disagree because getting a job would acutally give him money which means more money and more stress which leads to smoking weed ...

Honestly if you don't get into trouble for smoking black and milds then try to stay with that for as long as possible I smoke black and milds and its perfect way to get the craving for weed out of you way. About the job you really need to stay focused on that trust me I got kicked out of school softmore year for fighting, skipping to smoke, etc.. It really sucked for soooo long nobody would hire me because I didn't have a highschool diploma and it really was probablly the worse choice I ever made. You just need to think about whats best for you and your family in the long run and smoking pot won't help you better either of those ..

 

How you been man? You've always been giving me good feedback and i've never responded to you yet.

I'm just going to say some simple things.

1.) Your cousin is doing good things for you. She's taken you in, she's given you freedom in her house to do more things without as many responsibilities coming from parents. She's opening doors for you and giving you a ticket to a job. She's looking out for you and trying what's best. You already know this, but you're gonna have to hit yourself hard in the head and get this bullshit in.

2)No one can change your love for weed. It's your choice, it's your sanctuary, I respect that, and it shouldn't be taken away. But for the sake of her, wait until you're at least 18. Wait until you have the steady job. When you accomplish these tasks and things are going well and you can do for your own. Then you can come home from that shitty day of work and take a hit and enjoy yourself. You just need to get things settled first.

3) From what I've seen, you're a level-headed person, an appreciative person. You got good things going for your future. Just apply yourself for now, it's hard, but life's hard, you gotta pick up the slack and deal with the bullshit, no matter how unfair it gets. You'll do good, I believe so. You just need to take things into a positive perspective and apply for the better. Weed is always going to be there for you. That baby is always ready to give you some pleasure, but you need to deserve that pleasure. Get your shit straight my man. Stay away from the alcohol though.

 

My parents are pretty protective...if I could get out of the house more I would, believe me.

No worries man...we just share a lot of the same interests and i've been waiting for you to be signed to a label since I saw your first freestyle. I've been good, thanks for posting here .

The one that lives with me i'm guessing your referring to. Well, it's not her house. She lives with her mom, and my mom died when I was young so I live with my aunt (her mom) too.

The bolded part you're talking about my out of country one? Well, she is. And seeing her cry..eyes bloodshot..it really effected me. But when I hit 18 and I already have a job..

It's just fucked up. Sure it's sad, but it's MY LIFE.

I'm trying my best..i've been clean for months..no contact with it except for hearing kids talk about it. I sort of wish I could find a girlfriend that has a similar past with it that I do, and we could encourage each other....

+1

Bolded: 6 ft tall 155 LBS / soccer body , I out drink people 2x my age. Expand? I get the health risks but just specify where you're coming from.

 

Hide it better.

*User infracted for this post*

Why?

 

Until you're 18,even 19 in some states.You must do as your parents say.In the end you will be glad you did.Or if you don't you will be lurking upon why you didn't obey them after they are dead and gone.

 

If you tell this to your cousin, GF any sort of relationship between you two forever. The last thing you want to do to someone who is so anti-marijuana is put ridiculously unproven and generalized claims in front of her face to demonstrate how "smart" you are.

Bro, it sounds like your life is as complicated as every kid who's going through late high school, give or take a little bit. Some kids do drugs; some kids drink; some kids don't do anything, and their parents (guardians) still think they're going to be running off the deep end and getting into trouble. The most important thing for you to do is realize that this friction is necessary and normal, and be respectful to your cousin. From what I hear, she deserves a lot of respect. It's probably hard to see, but in some years, you'll be able to see it. Don't fight too hard, and don't just hide away.

As for your marijuana problem, I suggest just letting it take a back seat. Your priorities can't include toking up. Girls, school, maybe even college, and definitely family (which is hard to see, I know) are probably the most important things to you. A little smoking, if you have a lot of self-control, is not going to kill you or your personality... But the psychological addiction is very strong for some people, especially any teenager who feels lost (which is all of them).

You're one of the better guys to talk with than I've ever met, and I've only ever talked with you online. Still, you've got a lot to lose and little to gain from what I can see. The best thing to do in any situation is to figure out what's causing the problem and just turn your chin up on it. And the best ways to avoid getting into big problems is to surround yourself with people who are equally happy and driven.

I'm not trying to demean your problems because "everyone else has them, suck it up" because they are far from small. I'm just saying that you're able to come out of them, and usually it's just time and allowing yourself to come into touch with the changed reality. When I was 16-17 (though I didn't get into weed), I too was always sullen at home. My mom (single mom of 7 kids at the time) and I fought whenever we saw eachother, and I felt her views on religion, life, etc. were boxing me in and suffocating me. But it's normal for a mom/guardian to try and exert more pressure when you're about to leave because they are scared. It's also normal for a kid to want more freedom at that time because they've had 16 years of relatively good track record, and they're practically an adult already. It's probably going to take several more years for you and your cousin to realize this, but in the meantime, just try and be respectful to her. You don't want to do anything that you'll regret for the rest of your life.

 

I really needed to hear that...

What do you think of drinking/black and milds as sort of a "replacement" ?

 

It's a short-term replacement, but plan on getting out of it when you're in a more emotionally-stable place. My once-best friend IRL got heavy into marijuana, then crack and heroin. He was kicked out of his house, couch hopping, when he decided to quit. Obviously, you can't go cold turkey when you're in such an instable place. So he picked up cigarettes and temporarily weed. With help from NA, he's quit weed; and his proctor is not helping him with cigarettes.

Your situation isn't that bad obviously, but you still face some hostilities at home, as I can see. I say you can try and quit, but it'll be hard in ANY situation. Seeing as the drugs are an escape from home, you might need to fix the home problems first.

Obviously, drinking and cigarettes are bad for your health.

 

I'm not really escaping. I've accepted my family problems, genetics messed up with me. I must be quite the recessive child. I know people that as soon as they hit 18 they didn't talk to any of their immediate family ever again and now live happy lives. I'm content at home..I just like to go out and party occasionally. Weed is weed; but i'll last off of drinking. Not to mention as I said, that's where the girls are at. .

Also as I said, having a girlfriend with a similar goal as me would help a lot.

 

Unfortunately, it's easy to think that booze parties really are where the girls are at. This rely isn't true for all girls, though. I met my girlfriend while walking away from a college orientation seminar I really don't recommend going to parties to pick up chicks, though.

What do you mean by the recessive child? You have red hair in a family of black hairs? You dont exhibit male-pattern baldness? Personality, my friend, isn't quite so hereditary. It's more what you want it to become. Didn't you post in my thread that we're all accountable? Or was it someone else...

My biological father (haven't been parented by him since I was 2, although I visit him) is very easygoing, laid back, cheerful. I am these things, too... So yes personality is genetic. However, my mom divorced him because hrs emotionally inert... So I've used this to "exercise" my emotional "muscles," indicating that I'm really in control of the expression of my genes.

(Excuse my poor sentencing. Im on my iPhone cause I'm at my mom's for the night, babysitting my younger siblings. She's got no Internet at all, so no laptop.)

Even if you dont know your parents at all, you still know yourself. You know your own personality, and you know what you'd like changed. So change it?

 

I have been in that situation with my mom. She cried over me smoking weed a while back. Basically, to combat her emotion, I showed a lack of emotion. I pointed out that she was the only one crying and getting all upset over this. I mentioned that my dad didn't care and that plenty of well-to-do people smoke pot regularly. I showed her that smoking wasn't turning me into a brain-dead gang-banger like all the other people I grew up around. I showed her that pot doesn't affect who I am as a person or turn me into a criminal. I backed up my statements with hard facts and logic that you'd be a fool to not take into consideration.

I know it's not about you winning an argument, but in a sense, you want to get your point across that smoking weed is no big deal right? Well the best way to get your point across is to make viewpoint look stupid. Be ready for a long conversation, ask her what she thinks about you smoking pot, and go from there into taking each specific point she gives you, and demolishing it with logic and undeniable facts. In the end, she may be a little hurt, but it will really help her to open up to the fact that pot isn't going to hurt anyone.

 

I strongly disagree with this. For one thing, as a 16/17 year old kid, you can rarely convince adults that you're right. It's just embedded culturally and physiologically in your body that you're always right dammit! even when you're not. In reality, it takes years of wisdom to be right. I spent hours of long conversations with my mom when I was 16/17.... and now I'm starting to realize she was right. It's really hard to admit it when you're in the moment, but after a couple of years of passed, I'm sure you'll start seeing her way (and, also, she'll see your way in some views, too. Just because you're not always right doesn't mean you're always wrong too.)

My mom is one of five siblings. She's the only one who didn't get into pot while growing up. Now, she has a master's degree, a house worth $400,000, a job for $100k+ a year.... One of her siblings died last year at 48; he spent at least 15 years of his life in jail. Another sibling (another brother) has spent just as many years in jail; right now, he lives with his ex-wife because he's had two divorces since he divorced her and has no job. The other two (her sisters) have near-minimum-wage paying jobs, bounce month-to-month on a paycheck without any savings account, and all of their kids ran away before they were 18. Coincidence? =|