Parents not understanding my relationship with my girlfriend Please help

Well im 2 months 2 weeks 4 days with my gf today (she told me so herself XD) and well her parents want to meet me more since ive only met them like twice for 4 minutes when i went to pick her up to take her to the mall. Well this saturday my girlfriend had a garage sale and her parents asked her to ask me to help her so she wouldnt be alone and they can meet me at the same time. I asked my parents they said no since she my first GF and they dont think im serious with her. Her and me decided we are serious and well i asked my dad straight up and he said to just stop loving her... to hook up with more girls even tho im with her... and her told me even if we go for more months he will never let me go to her house... so idk i just feel bad since my dad doesnt like this... he sais he has nothing agaisnt her he just wants me to explore the world and not just stay with my first gf... and well idk i love my gf but he just doesnt understand so please help me... wat should i do...

NO TORLLS PLEASE... i am seriously looking for help =/

 

If you're father doesn't appreciate what you do he isn't doing the right thing. Just go without his permission, you gotta do your own thing. Explore the world my ass, it's a good thing to do, but if you find what you want stick with it. He has nothing to do with this, it's between you and her. He's being ignorant.

 

I'll pm you since I have few questions before I can give advise.

 

Are you still in school? If so, I agree with your father. Not to be a dick or anything but everybody goes through the same high school bf/gf bullshit. Your parents don't give a shit about it either. Everybody is going to have a gf in high school that they want to marry. Then when they break up, they want to kill themselves. Nothing new. Your father just wants you to live a little.

 

I agree with this,
But your father should probably let you go out and do stuff with this girl.
I thought I would love my ex forever, and we would live together and have children and stuff,
we broke up and now we don't speak anymore, she loves someone else.
You should tell your dad your not going to her house to have sex, but to help out with a garage sale.
Maybe he will understand..

 

Your parents are just trying to help you, I know it doesn't seem like it, but chances are that you two will break up eventually so your dad is just trying to get you to end it now so that you can get more experience with more girls rather then wasting your school days away with just one girl, who might not last.

 

Yes, but how can he explore if his dad will not let him go to her house. They have only been together for two months. Chances are during your school years you will last with a lot of girls for two months or so, you should still be able to go to their house. I think your dad is wrong for this, but every parent is different. In thie situation, tell your dad straight up your going to help with the garage sale so afterwards you guys can hook up. Maybe then he will be more open to you going

 

Your dad sounds a bit off, no offence. What kind of parent actually promotes pimping?

Disobey your father.

 

When i was 16 i ran with a girl because my father didn't liked her,long story short we returned after a month and she moved at my house and after 5 days or so i broke up with her.So,
Considering its your first girlfriend i guess your no more than 15(no offense if your older).At this point everyone had a girlfriend that thought they'd love her forever and have childrens and stuff,BUT you will most likely break up so my advice to you is to follow your heart.Thats the joy of being a teenager,do all your hearts desires.If you want to be with her then do it.Period.

 

Well im 16 XD and yea... well idk... its cuz my dad fucked up when he was 16 and had a kid... and i guess thats wat hes tryin to protect me of

Well gonig to school ill check up on it after football practice

 

Just go meet her parents what harm could it do?

 

One thing, what age are you?

If you're under the age of 16 I support your father's decision. But you must remember even if no one on this forum supports your father's decision it is final. You're under his roof and he he has the power and quite possibly the motive to throw you out on your ass. Which I can ASSURE you is no joke, and is no way beneficial to your character.

Ask to speak him on an intilectual level about the matter, and hear his views. He's mabye giving you this advise because he has suffered because of similar actions to the ones you're trying to make.

 

I have the same problems although, my problem is that my father is christian and doesn't believe i should be dating at this age.
The only thing you can do is for the parents to force meet, invite her parents and her over for tea one nights, without your fathers consent. You most likely will get in trouble, but the risk must be taken if you love her and want to stay with her.. Some parents are just like this, just be nice to your parents and try... I am only 15 and i can bribe my parents, lol... I just say i'll do a job.. Anyways bro, goodluck with this, try ease it onto your dad, if it doesnt help, just invite them over yourself.

 

I agree with a previous post, you father does not sound completely strait, what father promotes pimping? But anyway, don't listen to him, you really don't get any satisfaction from just going around to everyone. I would say stay with her, and think about if you love her or not. If you do, stay with her. Add my msn if you want to talk, [email protected]

 

In all honesty, at 16 it's a first instinct to "love" someone after being with them for a little while. Every one of us grew up watching and reading romantic novels/movies where true love is found and all ends up well. This creates a feeling that it's just a natural thing to do and it is what actually happens.

At 16 it's nice to fantasize about whatever you want, what the future will be like, what will become of the relationship - etc. But in reality, you won't love someone fully until you begin to build a life with them. Picture yourself with someone you "love" both on good days(easy) and on hard days(difficult).

Do you want to put up with this person for the rest of your life? I can honestly say with my girlfriend, it's hard to put up with her shit sometimes because from my perspective it's ridiculous about what upsets her.

I think this is what your father is trying to tell you, but he's trying to let you fill in the blanks here. You're just taking the words for what they are, think outside of the box. No parent wants to flat out say things like this to their kids because then they'll probably end up single for the rest of their lives for thinking to literal.

It's okay to "love" at your age, but it's a bit different as you grow older. Take a step back sometimes and put yourself in your fathers shoes. Do you think he's just a bit freaked out that you are dating at your age? Talk to him. Ask him why he thinks such things and have a nice conversation with him as to why he says the things he does.

 

You're partially correct, Siinep, but having dealt with a multitude of parents (who are also mostly idiots when it comes to raising children), I doubt his father is a logical person.

Denying your child the right to visit a friend/girlfriend is not conducive to teaching them to establish healthy relationships, it teaches them to not be reliable, or available to friends. I can't be sure because I haven't heard it straight from your fathers mouth, but as it sounds, he's not exactly the most encouraging parent.

A real parent would tell you to keep it in your pants, and go have fun. If he's trying to stop you from building a good relationship with this girl just because it MIGHT fail, or you MIGHT be able to find someone better, he's completely wrong. Do as you see fit to promote your relationships, irregardless of what your parents may say. If they don't approve, tell them that they don't have to, because you really don't care.

A big part of life is learning disappointment. While your fathers actions may have the best intent, you cannot learn from his mistakes, you have to experience life yourself. If this girl turns out to not be the one you want for the rest of your life, you need to find that out yourself.

 

He told me... well i cant stop you from inviting her but under no circumstances will you be able to go to her house.... =/

Yea i actually want to stay with my gf... no fights or anything so far... and yea i can deal wit her

Yea i know but they dont understand... i want to live life... if i mess up or anything i have to learn by myself

 

I think your father is incorrect, if he really wants you to "explore the world" or w/e, he'd let you explore the current relationship your in. If this turns out to be serious or not, you'll learn a lesson from it either ways... because any mistakes you might make now, you'll learn from and not make again.
From what you father is saying, he just wants you to find a new girl for no apparent reason; I don't see how you could learn anything from splitting up with someone for no reason... by staying with the person and going through problems, its only going to help you in the future.

If I were you, I'd ignore my father (with all due respect) and try my best in the current relationship.

 

Yea like idk... he messed up when he was 16 and had a kid and thats wat hes tryin to protect me of... but geez... i cant do anything... Like i can walk from the mall to her house in 5 mins... so i guess ima end up going to her house either way next time we go to the mall

 

I'm going with the same response I always seem to give. Try to talk to him again. Reason with him. Tell him what he is saying makes no sense. Prepare for it. If he still doesn't listen, then tell him the fuck off. And mean it. If you start telling him off and he yells at you to go to your room and your grounded or what ever, don't fucking budge. Just get right back in his face and then just leave. Honestly. Plan it so that you can just go from that to leaving and going to her house.

Yes, your going to get shit, but it doesn't matter as long as you believe that you are right and that your parents are being illogical. Be a perfect child, other than for this issue. Then your parents might realize their mistakes. Mine sure do. I've told my mom off plenty of times and after a few days she normally comes and says sorry and admits that she was wrong.