How do I become less shy/gain more friends?

Going to try and make this as short as possible.

Basically, I've been shy my entire life. I don't want to be. I just am. I always try to talk but it doesn't work out. For example,

This girl always used to say hi to me in the hallway. I'd try to say something back.. but it wouldn't come out. My mind was like "HI!!!."

I used to talk to this girl on Myspace and we stopped talking. She was in my English class last year. She was like "Hey, *name*" I replied "Hello" in a very quiet voice.

or... the other day at work I was on my lunch break. As I was walking out of Subway I saw a girl walking by, I opened the door and she said "Oh, I'm just walking by, but thanks!" I was going to say something clever... but it wouldn't come out. Instead I reacted with a little laugh -.-...

I've just always been this way. With both sexes.

I'm not mean or anything. People usually love me. It just takes something to break the ice before I can talk to someone. It's weird :|

Anyway.

Back to my point.

I don't have very many friends. Mainly because of this problem. Also, my sophomore year I lost all of my friends because I transfered schools. After I transfered back last year I spent all of my lunches with my girlfriend (who graduated). So now I basically have no friends. Except one good one who got his schedule has a different lunch. Sure I can hang out with some old friends... but I don't want to seem desperate to hang out with anyone. I don't want to hang out with people who don't really want me.

As a senior now, I don't want to eat lunch alone. I feel like it's too late to make new friends. Since everyone established friends over 4 years.

Any ideas? :|

 

Well, it's too late to become "popular" or really gain any sort of tough reputation. What I'd suggest is try being a nice guy to people. If you're witty, definitely let people see it. Just be more outgoing in general. It will be tough at first, but after a while it will become natural to you.

I was very shy until then end of middle school. When I decided to change that in time for High School, my social life improved dramatically. I think people like you and I sometimes are afraid to put ourselves out there for fear of being rejected, but as I learned many years ago, the benefits of being outgoing greatly outweigh the risk of rejection.

 

My suggestion to trying to gain a friend or two is to find someone that has a interest in a subject that you do too, expect its gotta be something that not everyone is interested in, but has enough of a base, that you will be able to find a friend somewhere, e.g...for me its anime, not many people like anime, but I found two or three people in my grade who like it, and now there all my friends

Btw it's also because then it'll be much more easier to talk about something to him/her, since it seems normal conversations don't go too well for you

 

The only way to do it is to put yourself out there. You know when someone talks to you, and you don't really care about anything they are saying, but you keep going with the conversation anyway? Thats what most people are like. Even if you aren't talking about anything too exciting, as long as you give them something to reply to, they will talk to you. Unless they are a real bitch. Then once you find a common interest, or when you get to know them more, you can have more interesting conversations. Your first couple conversations with randoms, usually won't be the most entertaining ones you've ever had, since its more testing the waters and learning about them.

 

You just need to develop more of a confidence and try talking to people as much as you can.

I mean, developing confidence is hard but all you need to do to start is to step out of your boundaries and find happiness outside of it.

Just try having a casual conversation with someone you feel slightly comfortable with, but aren't totally friends with.

 

do what is best man.

 

Well your obviously not doing something wrong because this girl says hi to you, but it is what you aren't doing right. You said that you talked on myspace, but you probably don't have the guts to talk to her in person. You should probably start talking more serious on IM and then you can start making more and more small talk in person. You really need to just build upon yourself and build up your courage.

 

I'll give you a few tips I have been in this situation before, in school I was very shy. I hated being shy so 1 day I thought WTF it's not hard... There is a long story but that's it short, real short.

Tips:
Be loud - when you speak loud people notice you more and your presence in the room is alot.
Be mad - just do mad stuff, once you start doing crazy thing people come up to you and talk to you about it like "wooah that was awesome".
Smile a lot - there is a shy kid I my college now and because he doesn't talk to anyone he sits on his own and sulks.
Stop caring - self explanatory

I could probably give you hundreds of tips but right now it's 3am and I am super tired.

 

A Moe in the living flesh... I'm envious, but I feel your pain. I'm horribly shy, especially at this school I'm attending in Kyoto. Everyone likes me, especially because I'm American, but it's hard for me to form conversation, or even glance at their eyes for more than a few seconds. I don't want to make a bad impression. And all I want is their friendship.

 

Your never going to make any friends keeping to yourself. Talk to people in your classes.

 

I've had this problems, too. I'm very quiet. The only reason I have friends is because of my looks [arrogant, no] and how I'm good at a bunch of sports [samething] and met a bunch of people through forced interactions on the court.

But I've just been told to throw yourself out there, talk about anything, and try not to be too afraid of embarassing yourself

 

get an after school job that involves you talking to people. i was semi shy most of my child hood (im now 20) i did get a job working in a bank as a teller when i was 17 and my shyness faded away you get use to talking to every type of person and you find it 10x easier to strike up convos with randoms just becomes like nature

 

Best way for you to make friends is talk to people in your class.

 

Be funny.

All you need make sarcastic dry jokes and you will be fine.

 

Don't be afraid to engage in conversations with other people. If you want to make more friends then your going to have to get over your shyness. Your Senior year should be one of the best years of your life. Come out of your shell, and start making new friends.

 

Don't try do any huge changes in short time. Try talk to more people, talk to different people. If you feel like you're getting ignored by some, find someone else, you can go back to the first the next day or two. Slowly this will develop self-confidence, and talking to people will become easier.
And like I said, don't try do huge changes in short time. Be yourself, it's possible to change yourself, but that takes time.

Good luck!

 

BE FUNNY

watch standup, and try and develope your own sense of humor. You will gradually start talking to people more and be less shy etc

 

very good idea. also start reading some main stream things, politics, and world events. i know it sounds corny and all. but those can be conversation topics. with high school i would stick more to main stream such as Lady Gaygay's music or even Jersey Shore Bro bullshit. haha.

or just become really good at impressions. lmao. but thats childish

 

Try being more social (going out in public more often) or try finding other people who are shy who live around you and you can both concur your shyness together.

 

My suggestion is Facebook, people tend to be less shy over the computer while talking to people. This way you'll be more comfortable when you meet them.